Morg's Meat Mashers vs. Giving the Boot
Orcs Kick Off
Orcs lined up in their standard power formation, with the thrower back as the safety. Goblins lined up entirely in the center. Kickoff is deep and to one side.
G1: The Goblins get off to a bad start by believing that they will be kicking the ball. Trying to make up for it, the fanatic manages to stun a black orc on the line. One of the trolls stares stupidly while another manages to knock over a lineman. The Goblins pick up the ball and get some help surrounding the ballcarrier in the backfield. A blitzing goblin also manages to knock over another orc from the line, much to said orc's embarrassment.
O1: The orcs, having few targets in tackle zones, pull their four wingers downfield toward the ball, knock over a troll, pull their deep safety thrower up to the closest goblin, and mostly feel useless.
G2: The fanatic stuns another black orc. But, sadly, this time, when a 2-die blocking goblin goes for the blitz, his reroll gives him double skulls.
O2: The orcs, looking to take advantage, manage to kill a goblin with a foul, get three men on the ballcarrier, and run away from the fanatic.
G3: The fanatic knocks down two orcs, stunning one. The dodging ballcarrier double-botches his dodge, falling over in the face of the orcs who just killed one of his blockers.
O3: The orcs succeed at a couple of blocks on the line and knock out one goblin before picking up the ball and running it in for the TD.
G4: The goblins, realizing they were receiving the kickoff this time, go with a somewhat different formation... bombs, pogo sticks, and chainsaws. Sad at the current situation, the fans bonk an orc with a rock. Then the chainsaw tears another orc open, sending him off the pitch. The bomb misses its targets, one troll goes stupid, the other pushes a black orc. Pogo manages to pick up the ball and move it forward. Another goblin blitz leaves the goblin hurt and a black orc knocked down.
O4: An orc manages to knock out the chainsaw-wielding madman. Overall, the line collapses toward the center ballcarrier and the two trolls in front of him.
G5: After a quick block, the goblins muff the handoff.
O5: The orcs knock over a goblin, get their broken-legged thrower to the ball, picking it up, and throwing it to the A4 lineman, in the tackle zone of a goblin. The catcher runs toward the end zone, and the orcs ko some more goblins before a black orc falls over trying to block a troll.
G6: The goblins knock over a troll with an errant bomb.
O6: After some meaningless blocks, the orcs run the ball in.
G7: Another rock stuns another orc player... my, these fans are angry! The troll goes for a 2-die block... double skulls.
O7: The orcs knock out another goblin, get some knockdowns, go for the ball... and watch it slide closer to the orc side of the pitch.
G8: The goblins pick up the ball, put fall over on the way to get beside a troll.
O8: The orcs pick up the ball, hand it off to a waiting blitzer, and get it in the end zone.
Half Time Score: Mashers 3 - Giving the Boot 0
O9: The orcs get a quick snap, and the kick goes out of bounds. The thrower brings it up and tosses it off to the A4 lineman. He gets a couple of lead blockers, while the line pushes around the trolls.
G9: The goblin blitz of the ball carrier is a push. The trolls knock out a black ork and push another. A goblin attempting to sneak his way around the orc lead blockers manages three blocks before falling over.
O10: The ball carrier advances. A block takes another goblin out of the game. More pushing silliness by the trolls.
G10: Another goblin blitz of the ball carrier ends with a push. The trolls knock over an orc, and another goblin gets to the ball carrier.
O11: The orc thrower pushes one goblin on the thrower out of bounds. The ball carrier gets away from the other goblin, and tosses the ball to a waiting blitzer, who runs it in for a touchdown.
G11: The goblins are down to 9 men on the pitch. The kick is short and near the midfield sideline. The goblins pull their backfield over to pick the ball up and cover the carrier. The trolls get a knockdown, but then a both-down against an orc with block.
O12: The orcs injure another goblin, and mostly surround the ball carrier.
G12: The ball carrier gets over to the trolls. One stuns another orc... the other is too stupid to throw the new ball carrier, forcing him to run off by himself.
O13: A blitzer catches up to the goblin runner and knocks him over. The A4 thrower picks up the ball and launches it back toward midfield, only to continue his butterfinger ways and drop it without throwing it anywhere.
G13: The goblins try to pick the ball up from beside the thrower and fail.
O14: The orcs knock over some goblins, pick the ball back up, run it forward, and throw it to a waiting blitzer. The thrower is inaccurate, but the ball bounces into the blitzer's hands, so all's well that ends well. He runs it forward.
G14: The troll goes for a blitz, and knocks both himself and the orc down.
O15: The orcs run the ball in.
G15: 8 Goblins on the pitch. The fans, tired of their beloved goblins doing poorly, throw rocks at both teams, killing a goblin. The goblins finally get a launched ball carrier from their trolls, who falls down on landing.
O16: The orc thrower picks up the ball and throws it to a waiting blitzer, who gets it safely downfield.
G16: Goblins swarm the ball carrier, knocking themselves over.
Final Score: Morg's Meat Mashers 5 - 0 Giving the Boot
Thoughts: Sadly, the goblins had loaded dice today. They made some dodges here and there, but failed an important roll pretty much every turn. The one-sided-ness of it all took away from the strategy, as the game was practically over by the half, and the second half felt pretty much like 8 turns of piling on. When I failed a GFI on turn 16, it was a surprise to both of us.
Despite 4 passes, 5TDs, 1 death, and 3 other casualties, I was only paid 20k for the match, and the match was given a 15/20 rating. Ungrateful wretches!
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Topic: Bloodbowl: LE - Season 2 - Morg's Meat Mashers Wins! (Read 21578 times)