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[Armok]

Oh hai guiz! sorry i didn't get back to u, but ive been kinda busy!

so it turns out ima rare mutation that means i never can haz soul, an also sorts of this applied theology progidy. And also i waz the only one to come up with teh idea to comine bayeian statistics, distributed computing, and certani magic glyps... so anywayz, now im basically a living incarnation of teh internets. and also evulz '

wach out britan, because this anon gona troll this planet to bits. so when u see me hatin in my new body that loks like this totaly sweet hetai version of slenderman with candy corn horns and eating a cupcake make from the sweet and tasy flesh of loli ponies riding my Amazing Horse all the way acros the sky, you'd beter hide! ^_^

((please don't kill me...))

[Taricus]

Where's that BFG I left lying around here...

[Burnt Pies]

Just saw a guy riding some sort of horse across the sky. My phobia of horsemen took over, and, I, uh... took a pot-shot at him. Think I hit him, because he fell off his horse and dropped his cupcake. Can't tell where he landed, but I found his cupcake, and, well, it smells terrible. I'm not even touching this thing.

Got a flask full of Lager and Black. No point in going through the apocalypse sober.

(I didn't kill you, I surprised your horse and it bucked you off. I figure with your cool new candy cane horns you can survive a drop like that.)

[ragnarok97071]

Well. Yesterday had some rather interesting results. I've figured out how to direct it, so I don't just randomly yell out latin and blow crap up whenever I need to.

Now I do it whenever I want to.

One of those Horsemen came by. called himself Explosions.

He tried to blow up my house. I channeled it into what looked like some sort of... Solid fire. And then everything that he'd damaged within the last hour or so (it was a lot.) suddenly became repaired.

And then I set up a magic minefield and took a nap.

[Armok]

oh belive me, i am still alive. dat cupcake was made from the flesh of ur moma so of corse it smells teribble. taktes gret thou! also my horns are candy corn not cane u mortal little uman. Imma go recreta boatmurdered up ur as now

((OOC: any tips for how to keep RPing like this without risking stepping on any forum rules? ))

[Furtuka]

May, 23, 2011, 3:03

Location: Chicago


A lot of us have fled to he cities and holed up in these makeshift bunkers and shelters. Outside we've been under constant siege from monsters. Just before I left I managed to print up a few copies of the Salvation War and they've been making the rounds around here. Seems they've been a real moral booster for some people.

[Burnt Pies]

That was you? Good grief.

If I'd known that I would've given it both barrels.

And didn't you say it was the flesh of loli ponies? Or is that some sort of weird internet code for the flesh of my mother?

Got my pills, my clothes and the Bike keys. Nothing in my house currently, knife hands guy and his friends seem to be milling around in the street outside. One of them looks a bit more intelligent than the others, doing my best to keep out of his way, even if he does turn out friendly.

[TherosPherae]

So I'm in Indianapolis, or the remains of it. I'm holed up in an old coffee shop, taking potshots at zombies from the roof, when this big glowing red moron with horns shows up, plows through a bunch of zombies and my barricade, and grabs me by the neck. In desperation, I chucked my coffee at him...

Apparently, espresso is another form of holy water now. That bugger turned into some sort of dust that's really hot to the touch. I think I'm gonna fill some shotgun shells with it after I rebuild my barrier and see what happens.

[Taricus]

Is it a starbucks?

[ragnarok97071]

Trying to make a Rift.

Think I'll drop in on you, Theros.

If you see it raining fire, you'll know that I've arrived.

Or demons, but probably me.

Probably won't be anywhere near you, but if you give me the name of the coffee place I might be able to pin it down with google maps.

[TherosPherae]

It's just some generic Starbucks place. Probably a million of 'em around here. I'll see if I can burn something into the roof to get your attention, though.

Also, the demon-ashes work very well as incendiary rounds. This big-ass biker zombie came marching up to my barricades, ripped 'em down, and I blew his torso into a smoking crater. Now I have to rebuild that barricade. Again.

[Taricus]

Well, atleast if the ashes run out you have the coffee to use. Starbucks coffee is lethal...

And in other news, Platypus demons.

[TherosPherae]

Yeah, but that demon left behind a LOT of ashes. And the espresso I killed 'im with wasn't from the Starbucks stocks, it was somethin' I brewed up myself. Good, strong, and enough caffeine to fell a rhino.

I chucked the Starbucks stuff out in the street to be gnawed on by the zombies. Oh, and I burned a toad into the roof with some demon-ashes if anyone wants to drop by.

Also, I looted that biker-zombie, and have now acquired a very large wrench for use as a blunt weapon for when I get bored of watching zombies' heads get blown off in clouds of fire.

[ragnarok97071]

Demon ash Toad, Huh? Gimme a second to modify my WIP spell to use it as a target...

There.

Should be showing up in a moment.

I'll probably proceed to roast anything nearby when I show up, so you'll know.

[Furtuka]

May 23 2011 4:29

Some sort of huge THING made of fire just showed up. It melted through most of the defenses like they were butter. Then it started tossing fireballs around until someone managed to catch it off guard and collapse part of the roof on top of it. When we were sure that it was dead we tried to dig out the corpse but all that was left of it was ashes. Right now we're all frantically scrambling to repair the holes it left.