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[phoenixuk]

On my civ screen, under important elven peoples:
Lulo Lirimasami: Acolyte/Elf Drunk
Salore Epevemowe: Princess
Yonali Ilathecethutha: Queen
Dafo Iledacata: Druid

So we've a druid, his wife, a daughter... and a drunk. Anyone else feel this has the making of a sit-com built into it?

On a more serious note, my civ has no important individuals. Does this mean I can't get a king at all? No promotion from within?

[Necro910]

You must have come across one of Cacame's (many) interdimensional children! Alriiiight!

You should be *vomits* friends with the elves. Else you will fear his under-developed beard's wrath!

[phoenixuk]

Cacame is cleary infecting other elves with his attributes, but the average elf cannot handle much, so this one just got Alcoholism.

It's a start

[Girlinhat]

Screencap plz!

[phoenixuk]

Voila, hope it works.

[NightmareBros]

Sorry guys, i just don't trust this drunk acolyte elf

I mean what self repecting drunk would go outside or prance peacefully with trees and animals

None! In my experiance they punch people in the face and throw tables.

Unless that's how he does things, in which case, good job drunkelf, we'ol stop being genociadal towards your race in case you breed anymore of yourself. Your drunk, incredibly bad tempered self.

[metime00]

None! In my experiance they punch people in the face and throw tables.

I'm going to assume you mean the outdated human mead hall tables, as dwarven tables are rooted into the earth by beard hair. They're impossible to move except by a legendary +5 furniture mover.

[Girlinhat]

Is that how dwarven construction methods work?  I've been wondering how a chalk wall can resist a flood of magma, and how dwarven fingernails can dismantle a steel floor.  They must augment the construction with beard hair and liquor!  They don't actually consume the majority of the alcohol, they just store it in their bodies, reconstituted by intricate Liver Operations and later re-applied to produce goods and construction.  This is how they work the stone without tools, they use their Booze Glue pouch and squirt liquid cement onto the stone.  Similarly, the Booze Acid gland allows them to smooth and engrave stone.

[Necro910]

None! In my experiance they punch people in the face and throw tables.

I'm going to assume you mean the outdated human mead hall tables, as dwarven tables are rooted into the earth by beard hair. They're impossible to move except by a legendary +5 furniture mover.

Legendary +5 Misc. Object User.

Get it right! 

[Naz]

Is that how dwarven construction methods work?  I've been wondering how a chalk wall can resist a flood of magma, and how dwarven fingernails can dismantle a steel floor.  They must augment the construction with beard hair and liquor!  They don't actually consume the majority of the alcohol, they just store it in their bodies, reconstituted by intricate Liver Operations and later re-applied to produce goods and construction.  This is how they work the stone without tools, they use their Booze Glue pouch and squirt liquid cement onto the stone.  Similarly, the Booze Acid gland allows them to smooth and engrave stone.

Dwarves have a biological process similar to how wasps chew up wood and then regurgitate it to build their nests. Except Dwarves do it with booze. We all know the primary organs in Dwarven anatomy: the beard, the axe, the booze hole and like...28 livers. All them extra livers process excess booze into a natural cement that so far has proven to stand up to extremes of pressure, temperature, strange moods and all known forms of attack.

[Girlinhat]

Perhaps this is why one log is enough for one earring, but somehow enough for an entire wall.  It's actually a very small log, carvable into an earring (granted, dwarves have super-dwarvenly tough ear lobes, so it's a rather large earring) but the actual wall is mostly constructed from reconstituted sugar and fermentation, with a smallish log set in the middle of it.

[Naryar]

*grunts* Wha' kind o' pansy dwarf play's ELVES ?

But... who said elves do not enjoy booze ? They do make alcohol after all.

[Azated]

Is that how dwarven construction methods work?  I've been wondering how a chalk wall can resist a flood of magma, and how dwarven fingernails can dismantle a steel floor.  They must augment the construction with beard hair and liquor!  They don't actually consume the majority of the alcohol, they just store it in their bodies, reconstituted by intricate Liver Operations and later re-applied to produce goods and construction.  This is how they work the stone without tools, they use their Booze Glue pouch and squirt liquid cement onto the stone.  Similarly, the Booze Acid gland allows them to smooth and engrave stone.

Everyone knows dwarves use their beard for all crafting requirements. They can chisel a rock of solid obsidian into a beautiful earring, and they can tear a wall apart in seconds with that sucker too.

Would be cool if the beard counted in combat.

Urist McBeardy slashes the Elven siege with his !!*beard*!!!
The severed piece flies off in an arc!

[Girlinhat]

Well technically, it takes several days to dismantle some walls.  Consider the timespan in fort mode.  Also, if so inclined, you could add an attack for the beard, but it would be rather limp and ticklish according to the raws.

[moki]

...but it would be rather limp and ticklish according to the raws.

Sorry for even more derailment, but some sentences simply have to read out of context...