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[Aklyon]

You are the Leader of a Large SCIENCE Company.  You have a quite large HAMMER in your left hand, and the Dept. heads are generally in a sad mood over the lack of good news, except in the Redundancy Department, who have been redundantly reproducing their redundant successes and generally getting themselves stuck in a Happy Loop.

It is now time to end the meeting. How will you end it this time? The bean counters are hoping that it will not involve another HAMMERED TABLE, but they aren't saying so out loud.

[Aklyon]

You decide to just say "We're done here.", and walk out.
What SCIENCE Project will be worked on first?
(basically suggest anything a reasonably large SCIENCE company could do, and if it isn't completely crap and/or impossible (or not very profitable if we start running out of money), they'll try it!)

[ggamer]

Develop a cannon that shoots monkeys. Market it as a children's toy.

[Geen]

Portal guns! 'nuff said.

[Aklyon]

The Portal Device is suggested an agreed upon unanimously! The (Kids) MONKEY CANNON is also proposed. Current funding is Adequate, so both are sent straight to Research!

Projects:
Current R&D: Portal Device (Main), Kid's Monkey Cannon (Secondary team)
Current Production: The quickly failing Manageroid. Full abandonement of remaining stock to Mail-Order Catalog and Door-to-Door salesperson subsidiaries imminent in coming months.

Funding/Profits: Adequate/Lackluster.

[Hubris Incalculable]

Apply for government funding on portal device - market it to them as a high-profile weapon

[Aklyon]

The government won't listen until it reaches at least PROTOTYPE stage. You call one of the secretaries to write down that plan for later.

[powpow]

propose a charity oragnisation owned by the company with donations being skimed for profit

also create or buy out popular fast food chain for steady profits

[noah22223]

Create Giant AI named GLaDoS.
Rename company Aperture Science.

[Hubris Incalculable]

Create Giant AI named GLaDoS.
Rename company Aperture Science.

No, that's going a bit far.

[Ultimuh]

Create Giant AI named GLaDoS.
Rename company Aperture Science.

No, that's going a bit far.

Yes I agree.
But this raises a question.. what IS our company name? No wonder why things are going slow.

[powpow]

it the LARGE science comapany

[Knave]

HAMMERs seem to be a big part of this science company.

HAMMER Technologies.

[Aklyon]

You guys pre-empted me
I was about to ask that.
Anyone against HAMMER Technologies? (we should probably turn that into an acronym if its going to be in the company title, I've just een CAPS-ing our hammer because its an IMPORTANT ITEM.)

Meanwhile, The monkey cannon finishes R&D first, and is now in the MONKEY-LESS PROTOTYPE stage. Monkeys are being acquired as this is announced.

[Taricus]

HAMMER the executive board out of their bonuses. You need those more than they do.