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[USEC_OFFICER]

Nothing's better than beating up tanks and jet fighters with your robo-fists.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Super Robot Wars: Original Generation

Also trying out different ways of resizing screenshots for future LP shenanigans.

[kisame12794]

Got the Enforcer for Risk of Rain, and my god, the Serve and Protect skill is amazing. Blocks all damage when the enemy is in front of you? Hell yeah! Put your back against a wall, plonk your shield down, and blast away with your shotgun. Still haven't gotten past level two yet, but it's still not at the ragequit level.

Risk of Rain.

[IronTomato]

Disarmed an enemy of his sword.

Cut his head off with it.

Kept the sword.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

DF adventure mode. This adventurer's racked up a pretty impressive list of kills, mostly criminals, as this area has an abundance. His title is "The Confusing Hammerer of Budding.

[Xantalos]

Disarmed an enemy of his sword.

Cut his head off with it.

Kept the sword.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

DF adventure mode. This adventurer's racked up a pretty impressive list of kills, mostly criminals, as this area has an abundance. His title is "The Confusing Hammerer of Budding.

But are you bisecting people with a mining pick?

[IronTomato]

Disarmed an enemy of his sword.

Cut his head off with it.

Kept the sword.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

DF adventure mode. This adventurer's racked up a pretty impressive list of kills, mostly criminals, as this area has an abundance. His title is "The Confusing Hammerer of Budding.

But are you bisecting people with a mining pick?

No, I've never heard of that happening. You just gave me another adventure mode goal, though.

Also, this adventurer was just assassinated. I looked at the legends page for the killers, they were members of the same faction as the criminals whose camps he had cleared out.

[Mr Space Cat]

But are you bisecting people with a mining pick?

No, I've never heard of that happening. You just gave me another adventure mode goal, though.

Picks can be crazy awesome tools of carnage. Like the dwarven, more fun equivalent of lightsaber-whips.

[Xantalos]

But are you bisecting people with a mining pick?

No, I've never heard of that happening. You just gave me another adventure mode goal, though.

Picks can be crazy awesome tools of carnage. Like the dwarven, more fun equivalent of lightsaber-whips.

Indeed. I've been doing it for a while now. I'm carrying around 12 picks on my person.
My autoattack is a rain of blood and death.

[Hanslanda]

I got to the mines of Cloakwood. Pro-tip: Actually getting to the mines is half the work. Let me lay it down for you.

There are four areas to be traversed to get to the mines themselves. The first area is a little woodland area of no real interest. There is a fight with some druids and a few spiders, wolves, and tasloi (ugly little things with spears).

The second area is the spider nest. Spiders everywhere, in packs of 6-9, mostly Huge Spiders, with an occasional Giant Spider. There are dozens of web traps that WILL ABSOLUTELY RUIN YOU. Imoen didn't actually have a high enough trap finding skill to find them, because I'm a dumbass, so I had to use the tried and true method of 'Run over the trap, then run back to the group and hope you don't get webbed, poisoned, and die like a dipshit.' It worked perfectly, allowing me to easily vanquish the few Ettercaps I encountered. Then I got to the Spider's Nest, with Centeol, who is grossly disfigured. She summons a sword spider (BAD FUCKING NEWS) four Giant Spiders, two Ettercaps, and I think she can cast spells. Or maybe not. Anyways, I kill all this crap, and move on.

The next area is another woodland area with another fight with some Shadow Druids. Easy enough.

Then final area is the area with the Wyvern Caves. Wyverns have some of the nastiest poison in the entire Baldur's Gate series, and that is seriously saying something. I clear out the Wyvern caves with minimal difficulties, and get to the Mines. There is a little Motte and Bailey, and in the first palisaded area, you encounter two fighters and two mages. This is usually a rough fight because they're well equipped, but I separated the fighters from the mages and horrored them, then killed one of them while the other ran away. I slaughtered the mages without their meat shields. Then I returned to the Friendly Arm Inn because I needed to sell some shit. Then I hunted down Captain Brage because holy shit Cloakwood Mines are fucking ridiculous.

Baldur's Gate: the Original Saga

[JimboM12]

This one isn't really about me owning, but it was pretty cool nonetheless.

So, I spawn in and quickly get my bearings, cuz I haven't logged in this game since last year. I run to the nearest terminal and switch classes to Combat Medic, the only class I spent cert points in. 

The squad leader of the squad I was dumped into buys a Galaxy troopship and yells for the rest of us to get on board. So me and the other 3 squad members run to the thing and strap in, taking off for the nearest hotspot (one of the biolabs if I remember right). There were tracers lighting up the sky ahead and dog fights going on, shit was going down, man. So, we start taking ground fire and we start lowering alt. One of our squadies panics when we take a heavy hit and exits the ship, squashing himself flat on the ground below, lol nooblord. The rest of us hold on while our valiant leader gets us in under the flak fire. 

We ram into the side of the lab and exit quick, taking cover inside. We sneakily run to point A and begin camping, pretty confident the enemy was too busy fighting against our allies outside to notice. Well, here comes one MAX suited tango with double anti-infantry mounts and shreds our leader and our heavy assault. So me and engineer-bro start going full auto on the guy, making him break off, buying enough time for me to rez our fallen allies. Engi-bro deploys a turret and our allies cover the other entrance, in case we get flanked. Welp, here comes Tango-1 again, bursting our heavy down again, but this time takes a rocket to the face, and mass dakka puts him down hard, so we break for point B after i rez our fallen dude again.

This time though, Tango-1 gets a few buddies and comes back, setting us into a protracted siege where we covered our only entrance with every thing we had. It looked pretty grim, as more and more of them poured in heedless of losses against our combined dakka, Stalin be proud. We start giving cheezy heroic speeches like "Thank you for your service, comrades!".

We start getting hammered and I couldn't afford putting away my heal gun, when we start hearing explosions close by. Well, wouldn't you guess it, Nooblord had spawned back at the warpgate and loaded up another troopship with a bunch of guys and came back. Feeling very heartened by this we begin pushing back out towards point A again. After a protracted battle and 2 more reinforcement waves, we take the area and raise a great shout! Hip hip hooray for Nooblord!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

This was Planetside 2, we were Terran vs the Vanu. It was glorious.

[Reudh]

Got my first ever MAX kill on Planetside 2, Terran Light Assault vs. NC MAX.

He must've been using a trackpad, because he couldn't seem to move his view fast enough to keep up with me circle strafing and occasionally flying over him. It was glorious.

[Hanslanda]

I absolutely stomped the top floor of the Iron Throne tower.

You come up the stairs, and are immediately beset by: 2 priests, 2 mages, 3 fighters, and several doppelgangers. The mages (Bard and a mage, truth be told) both turn invisible and start lobbing damage spells at me. The priest starts trying to cast dominations and such, but my party is hasted, blessed, resistant to fear, and prepared for this confrontation. Minsc rushes across and assaults a mage and a fighter. Jaheira summons a swarm of wild dogs on top of the archer/halberd fighter, and keeps casting entangling. Dynaheir casts horror and magic missile at the mages, disrupting the closest one's spell casting. Khalid deals with the Doppelgangers (We love him so, but he must take the easy jobs, disadvantaged as he is. Surely you understand, poor fellow.) and my character butchers a priest, a fighter, and the mage that Dynaheir is disrupting. The enemy forces are surprised by the speed and power of our counter-assault, and most of the spell-casters die pretty much immediately. Minsc wails on his fighter to great effect, and the dogs pile onto the fighter/archer, slowly tearing her to shreds. We mop them up in record time.

The first time I ever did this fight, seven or more long years ago, the bad guys BUTCHERED me. Absolutely butchered. This time, I slaughtered them with ease.

Baldur's Gate

[Akura]

Invaded Utopia. Sent three massive troop carriers, carrying well over 60 troopers in total. Parked them all in the same spot somewhere in Utopia's orbital path, then sent all three to attack the planet. Utopia's ion cannon disabled one, but the other two managed to reach the planet. All at once, the defenders of Utopia shredded the (now empty) transports, but left the disabled one alone, while the Ancient Guardians simply said "Stop attacking us!". While the ground battle was going fairly evenly, the third transport, still disabled, somehow floated right into Utopia, dropping it's load. The defenders of Utopia, who were previously outnumbered roughly 2-1, suddenly surrendered, giving me control of the best planet in the galaxy, about 50-100 ships with maxed out tech, and Utopia's massive space port and defense batteries. I proceeded to retire all the Ancient Guardians' ships for their tasty tech bonuses(most of them, for some reason, kept giving progress on Indestructible Compounds, which I wasn't really researching).

My tax income went from -~40k(tourism more than covered that) to over 1 million instantly.

In the meantime, I am building two abandoned planet destoryers, although my spies have discovered that the Boskara are building one of their own. And since the bugs have had no qualms about spying on me(badly), parking fleets in orbit around my worlds, and even one or two isolated attacks on freighters, I'm gonna use it on their homeworld.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Distant Worlds: Return of the Shakturi.

[itisnotlogical]

Beat Knee-Deep in the Dead in Doom in one sitting, which took about a month of effort the first time. It's a bit embarrassing to see that some levels previously took me 20 minutes to complete. I think the ZDoom automap shows some things that the vanilla map doesn't, but I'm still absolutely smashing my previous playthrough. I have no idea why I used to suck so badly at Doom.

Doom, obvs.

[Mech#4]

Oh I get like that sometimes. I'm rather surprised by how short some games I used to play actually are. I put it down to I used to explore a whole lot more, because I didn't know for sure whether or not there was something behind that permanently locked door or not.

Recent ownage... uh... I can perform a proper combo in "Skullgirls"? "lp - lk - mk - fwd hk -cancel into qcb - qcf kk" for Painwheel. Combo inputs and me have a "practice-then-get-finger-cramp" relation. I much prefer fighters which allow moves to be queued to a degree, unlike Street Fighter IV which requires insane timing skills to pull off regularly.

[Hanslanda]

I beat Baldur's Gate: The Original Saga legitimately (Read: Without cheating) for the fifth or so time ever in my entire life.


Sarevok is an engine of destruction. He's absolutely horrifying. Dynaheir used an entire Wand of Monster Summoning that I bought for THIS EXPRESS PURPOSE ENTIRELY ON SAREVOK. HE KILLED ALL OF THE SUMMONS. HE KILLED LIKE 50+ Gnolls, 30+ Hobgoblins, and UNCOUNTED wild dogs. My main character, Minsc, and Khalid kept dashing in and slashing him once or twice until he refocused on them, then they'd dash back out before he killed them. Imoen used ALL her Arrows of Piercing and Biting and most of her +2 Arrows. Dynaheir cast ALL THE MAGIC MISSILE (Some 14 Magic Missiles. 14 x 5 = 70 individual 1d4+1 missiles), and Jaheira cast all her useful buffs and stuff, then plinked away with +2 bullets and slashed Semaj to blood ruins on her own, because badass.

I BARELY killed Sarevok with the cheesiest tactics ever. He's a fucking monster and my favorite villain ever for it. Course, Irenicus has MUCH better lines. "I cannot be caged. *kills a high level wizard with a flick of his wrist* I cannot be controlled. *Kills another* Understand this as you die. Ever pathetic, ever fools. *Turns the last to stone and casually explodes the statue*"