Decided I was sick and tired of France besieging my cities on the mainland, and went on the offensive. My king and a large army of mostly infantry and longbowmen set sail from England and went straight for Paris, which was only lightly defended. Of course, the Frenchies would have none of that, and their largest army (that I know of) attacked along with the Parisian garrison, on opposite sides. I faced well over a thousand soldiers in all.
I positioned my army in a wooded area, counting on my troops hiding among the trees to land the first blow on a surprised enemy. Since longbows have ridiculous range, they were able to open fire before any of the attacking army could react. And because I had so many longbows, vast swaths of the French were dead in minutes. Their own pitiful archers got in range and tried to shoot back, but my casualties were acceptably light and soon the archers were routing. I diverted my attention to the Parisian garrison, which was slowly marching towards my rear. The Parisians had brought their faction heir along with a large number of crossbowmen, but few infantry. I had my king and a unit of Mailed Knights charge the French faction heir by themselves, retreating when French spearmen managed to join the fray and looping around to attack the crossbowmen. The faction heir decided to ignore my king and charge my longbowmen instead, only to be surprised by hidden English spearmen and get himself killed.
By this point, the main French army had finally managed to come to grips with my own army. It was a bloody, confusing mess, but with French dying everywhere and their leaders dead or fleeing the field my victory was inevitable. Less than 100 French soldiers escaped, and because Paris was virtually undefended it was captured without further fighting.
Medieval II: Total War. Of course, immediately after this the Pope dies. The French cardinal somehow gets every single one of the votes, and now I'm being told to play nice or face excommunication. Considering that my best mainland fortress is currently under siege and the French are refusing a ceasefire...