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Author Topic: How did you last *own*?  (Read 1351321 times)

Mr Space Cat

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1695 on: August 31, 2013, 09:45:15 pm »

I was Janitor Xemo, the lizardwoman. I start off, as traitor. I go steal the Double Barrel shotgun real fast, then get a syndikit, the camouflage kit. Useless when you have a FUCKING BRIGHT GREEN TAIL. So I get the QM to give me a circular saw, and I cut down the shotgun. Then I go to engineering, where some guy crits himself with his own e-sword. I get in, and take his e-sword in front of three people, sleight-of-hand style. Then I get his emag and Captain's Spare ID. So I mug the Head of Security's corpse, and find nothing of value.

I go loot the armory, and go to Cloning, where they are cloning the Head of Security. I emag the cloning pod, and slash her semi-cloned body a couple times, then stun most of the crew, and take the Head of Personnel hostage. As I'm doing so, she says, "HOW ARE YOU SO GOOD AT THIS?!" Up until this round, Xemo had never been robust or badass in any way, and was quite the opposite. Suddenly, huge character dissonance. It is far more disturbing to see a nice, polite, well mannered, helpful janitor suddenly turn into a raging engine of destruction than it is to see a soldier do so.

I go to security, and load up on the Ablative vest and other such things. Then, I stun three crewman that get in, and kill the one with a stun baton. The RD I throw in Interrogation, and the Virologist pulls a syringe gun on me, so I kill her too. Then the RD runs at me with a flash, and I kill him also with my sword. Then, as I'm boarding the pod, the HoS and I have a little firefight, and I finally stun the HoS thanks to my Riot Helmet, Shield, and Ablative vest. Then I cuff her and put her on the pod, warning her not to fight the restraints. She does so, so I cut her into critical with my e-sword and toss her into space. This whole time, I keep the Head of Personnel hostage.

I win the round, getting all my objectives complete, and also totally tripping a few people out with the whole character personality switch. The whole time, I kept speaking like Xemo, "Xemo no wants to fights you. Ple-ayse do not fights Xemo, Xemo has killeded three peoples already."

Hans!Xemo stronk.

This was SS13? Sounds crazy-awesome enough to be.
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Hanslanda

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1696 on: August 31, 2013, 10:04:14 pm »

* Hanslanda is meteor'd.

Yes, it was SS13.
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Well, we could put two and two together and write a book: "The Shit that Hans and Max Did: You Won't Believe This Shit."
He's fucking with us.

USEC_OFFICER

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1697 on: September 01, 2013, 08:27:15 am »

* Hanslanda is meteor'd.

Yes, it was SS13.

Don't worry. There are no meteors in the *own* thread. Only stern glances and sharp knifes.
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kaian-a-coel

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1698 on: September 01, 2013, 03:21:39 pm »

I was Janitor Xemo, the lizardwoman. I start off, as traitor. I go steal the Double Barrel shotgun real fast, then get a syndikit, the camouflage kit. Useless when you have a FUCKING BRIGHT GREEN TAIL. So I get the QM to give me a circular saw, and I cut down the shotgun. Then I go to engineering, where some guy crits himself with his own e-sword. I get in, and take his e-sword in front of three people, sleight-of-hand style. Then I get his emag and Captain's Spare ID. So I mug the Head of Security's corpse, and find nothing of value.

I go loot the armory, and go to Cloning, where they are cloning the Head of Security. I emag the cloning pod, and slash her semi-cloned body a couple times, then stun most of the crew, and take the Head of Personnel hostage. As I'm doing so, she says, "HOW ARE YOU SO GOOD AT THIS?!" Up until this round, Xemo had never been robust or badass in any way, and was quite the opposite. Suddenly, huge character dissonance. It is far more disturbing to see a nice, polite, well mannered, helpful janitor suddenly turn into a raging engine of destruction than it is to see a soldier do so.

I go to security, and load up on the Ablative vest and other such things. Then, I stun three crewman that get in, and kill the one with a stun baton. The RD I throw in Interrogation, and the Virologist pulls a syringe gun on me, so I kill her too. Then the RD runs at me with a flash, and I kill him also with my sword. Then, as I'm boarding the pod, the HoS and I have a little firefight, and I finally stun the HoS thanks to my Riot Helmet, Shield, and Ablative vest. Then I cuff her and put her on the pod, warning her not to fight the restraints. She does so, so I cut her into critical with my e-sword and toss her into space. This whole time, I keep the Head of Personnel hostage.

I win the round, getting all my objectives complete, and also totally tripping a few people out with the whole character personality switch. The whole time, I kept speaking like Xemo, "Xemo no wants to fights you. Ple-ayse do not fights Xemo, Xemo has killeded three peoples already."
one more of that stuff and I'm going to end up playing that game. Sounds freaking awesome.
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Facekillz058

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1699 on: September 01, 2013, 03:36:21 pm »

one more of that stuff and I'm going to end up playing that game. Sounds freaking awesome.
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Greiger

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1700 on: September 01, 2013, 07:44:09 pm »

I have a love hate relationship with  SS13.

It is awesome.  But it also takes forever, and I feel guilty leaving in the middle of the round so I often end up staying awake a good 4 hours after I needed to go to bed or do something else, especially when I'm something like the CE.

----
Planetside 2.
Trying to hold a facility solo as a member of new conglomerate. I am a light assault. There is a VS Sunderer parked outside the facility with a small guild respawning from it attempting to take my facility.  I usually get less than 10 fps playing this game, but there aren't a whole lot of people on this section of the map and I'm getting a buttery smooth 40 fps.

Maybe that explains it, but I somehow went from usually dies before I even see the enemy, to an unholy god of war.  I spot all three of them jumping out of the sunderer and pick one off from inside the main tower with my carbine.  He was their medic, ouch.

I end up in a bad sniper duel, me with a carbine and the enemy with a sniper rifle.  While in cover I lob a grenade and pop out of cover firing a couple bursts.  Most hit, miraculously but my gun isn't strong enough to take them out with a few hits, especially at that range.  My grenade however happily explodes on top of them, finishing the job.

Then I see the point being captured and run to go deal with that.  But the guy isn't even facing in my direction. I come up behind him and knife him a few times before he gets a chance to fight back.

It was awesome, and best I ever did in that game.  Of course almost immediately after that the infiltrator headshot me twice when I couldn't even tell where he was, killing my spree. But a minute or so later some friendly guys spawned in and helped me clean them out.   I like to think that if it wasn't for that first spree they wouldn't have had time to spawn in and save the day.
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mcclay

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1701 on: September 01, 2013, 07:55:30 pm »

FUCK YOU NAZIS! YOU THINK I CAN'T BLOW UP YOUR PANZERS AND FINISH THE LEVEL! I SURE FUCKING SHOWED YOU! I SPIT ON VETERAN MODE! I SPIT!

Call of Duty 2, veteran mode.
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Hanslanda

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1702 on: September 01, 2013, 09:08:47 pm »

I have a Wespe, a Tier 3 Artillery Tank. Just got it, fresh paint and everything. I start my first round with it, and the player list comes up.

Literally everyone but three people is Tier Five. Me, another Tier 3, and a Tier 4. I type, "Oh god. I am in the WRONG PLACE." Round starts, and I roll up this little hill behind a rock formation.

My first shot immobilizes a (heavy?) tank, and it gets cut apart by two of my teammates from cover. My second shot misses, but my third outright kills a medium tank. My fourth and fifth shot don't hit, but my sixth shot ALSO kills a tank outright. My final shot immobilizes the final enemy tank, who then gets RAMMED FOR GREAT JUSTICE by a teammate, who then blows their ass away with point blank cannon fire.

Well. Guess I wasn't in the wrong place.

World of Tanks
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Well, we could put two and two together and write a book: "The Shit that Hans and Max Did: You Won't Believe This Shit."
He's fucking with us.

jetex1911

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1703 on: September 01, 2013, 10:15:15 pm »

I managed to escort Mercedes through areas that I had no business in, evading a Chimera and a Drake, (Which killed me whenever they saw me.), and after battling a small army of Saurians. Of course, when the Shadow Fort was in sight, my party was seen by a goblin, which blew a horn it had... Suffice to say, I think the sight of a man holding an armored lady hopping furiously to the door, all while he was chased by his allies and an army of goblins must have been a funny sight to the defenders.

Dragon's Dogma

Of course, me having no business being there, they won't let me enter the fortress. And night has already fallen... I suppose I'll have to make a mad dash for Gran Soren. Wish me luck! Edit: Made it.
« Last Edit: September 01, 2013, 10:55:31 pm by jetex1911 »
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Sirus

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1704 on: September 03, 2013, 11:00:56 pm »

Defeated the jerk who stole my character's title as the world's Number 1 Hero. On my first try! Afterwards, the main character thanked me for all my help in fulfilling her dream. Awww.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Hanslanda

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1705 on: September 03, 2013, 11:40:54 pm »

I had a Tier One Liechttraktor in a Tier FIVE (!!!) match with Heavy Tanks and stuff. I survived being shot SEVERAL times, and ALSO made it to the enemy base.

In a fucking Tier One light tank. In a gorram Tier Five match. I don't even... What...

We won.

World of Tanks
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Well, we could put two and two together and write a book: "The Shit that Hans and Max Did: You Won't Believe This Shit."
He's fucking with us.

tryrar

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1706 on: September 03, 2013, 11:59:16 pm »

I have a love hate relationship with  SS13.

It is awesome.  But it also takes forever, and I feel guilty leaving in the middle of the round so I often end up staying awake a good 4 hours after I needed to go to bed or do something else, especially when I'm something like the CE.

----
Planetside 2.
Trying to hold a facility solo as a member of new conglomerate. I am a light assault. There is a VS Sunderer parked outside the facility with a small guild respawning from it attempting to take my facility.  I usually get less than 10 fps playing this game, but there aren't a whole lot of people on this section of the map and I'm getting a buttery smooth 40 fps.

Maybe that explains it, but I somehow went from usually dies before I even see the enemy, to an unholy god of war.  I spot all three of them jumping out of the sunderer and pick one off from inside the main tower with my carbine.  He was their medic, ouch.

I end up in a bad sniper duel, me with a carbine and the enemy with a sniper rifle.  While in cover I lob a grenade and pop out of cover firing a couple bursts.  Most hit, miraculously but my gun isn't strong enough to take them out with a few hits, especially at that range.  My grenade however happily explodes on top of them, finishing the job.

Then I see the point being captured and run to go deal with that.  But the guy isn't even facing in my direction. I come up behind him and knife him a few times before he gets a chance to fight back.

It was awesome, and best I ever did in that game.  Of course almost immediately after that the infiltrator headshot me twice when I couldn't even tell where he was, killing my spree. But a minute or so later some friendly guys spawned in and helped me clean them out.   I like to think that if it wasn't for that first spree they wouldn't have had time to spawn in and save the day.

Planetside 2 is cool and all, but frequent fps deops and my general suckyness with FPS multiplayer made it a true grind to unlock ANYTHING without resorting to PTW(Pay to Win), which killed the enjoyment for me :(
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Akura

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1707 on: September 05, 2013, 11:46:16 am »

The Confedracy managed to build their ultimate starship, the Malevolence, and launched it in a suprise attack on Kuat. Or Alderaan, I forget, and they should have been able to reach either. Since I haven't actually fought a superweapon before, I was surprised to find out that it's always visible(Clone Intelligence at work, I suppose. Hey, where's Grievous hiding, by the way?!) on the map, and I had time to move my fleet to reinforce. The result was a resounding victory for the Republic, the Malevolence and its entire fleet was destroyed with minimal losses on my side.

Then, seconds later: "Malevolence construction time: 0:59". Turns out you can just rebuild superweapons. And I checked their credit history, they didn't seem to pay anything for it, the fucking cheaters :x.

But that's not all. I quickly dispatched Master Plo Kloon and what was left of Delta Squad(Fixer having been killed in an earlier assault on Fondor) to do a commando raid on Mintooine, the only place the Malevolence can be built. They arrive at ONE second left before it was ready.

One old Jedi and a crack commando squad landed, cut their way through patrolling droids, destroyed or bypass several of the ridiculous number of starship-sized blaster cannons they had defending the place. They made all the way to a fork that split off north and south. To the south was a single droid factory, producing constant reinforcements, and to the north was a shield generator protecting and powered by a power generator that also powered all these big guns. Unfortunately, neither side was viable, since the junction was guarded by no less than four of the starship cannons, far too much for Delta Squad and Master Plo Koon to take head-on. Instead, I sent Sev, who has a personal stealth field, alone, and snuck him around to take out the power generator with his sniper rifle. Everything else was just sticking droids with a lightsaber.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Dirg

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1708 on: September 05, 2013, 10:22:50 pm »

I was just a mouse minding my own buisness when I noticed the station had gone on full alert and the power was out. I had remembered seeing a slice of cheese laying on the table of a kitchen, but because of the not so friendly chef, I hadn't tried to eat it yet. Now was my chance.

I quickly snuck in via the vents under the cover of darkness to seek my prize when the chef saw me out of the corner of his eye and started trying to chase me out of the kitchen. I ran for the vents but didn't have enough time on the first pass to be able to squeeze to safety so I continued to run from this mad man as he finally caught up and cornered me, but I saw an opening! I dashed between his legs and sprang for the vent when in his frenzied state, the chef struck himself in the chest with his own knife. I could hear him swearing and cursing me as I crawled away to safety on another part of the ship.

I later went back for the cheese when I felt enough time had passed that he would no longer be watching the vents. Whether it was because of the self inflicted knife wound causing him to bleed out slowly over time, or something else, when I returned I saw the chef passed out on the ground. Because of the emergency shutters being in place no help had arrived for him, or even knew of his fate. I took one long look at my former adversary before I climbed up onto the table and finally began nibbling on the cheese.
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« Last Edit: September 05, 2013, 10:27:18 pm by Dirg »
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Greiger

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Re: How did you last *own*?
« Reply #1709 on: September 05, 2013, 10:29:07 pm »

SS13 becomes more and more awesome every time I hear it mentioned.
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Disclaimer: Not responsible for dwarven deaths from the use or misuse of this post.
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I don't need friends!! I've got knives!!!
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