I constructed a skeleton! Technically I constructed a dozen skeletons last week, but the mostly-intact human remains that keep washing up on the river hardly count. All they needed were "skulls". Human skulls are bizarrely rare compared to every other bone, but fortunately you can buy replicas. The constables who buy the "murder evidence" seem more impressed than concerned that the replicas are made of brass.
But these remains weren't human, oh no! Nothing so nearly-authentic! Today I did "paleontology" in the most cynical, victorian sense!
So first I went on a dream-safari and captured a bird with seven heads. This part was actually legitimate science, of a sort. Then I butchered it, which I felt kinda bad about because it's sentient and very talkative. Lots of talking animals get casually killed in this game, it's a little weird actually. But Victorian science, right? At least this was in the interests of knowledge?
Ha no, the skeleton was way too small so I used a magically warped ruler to make it human-sized. Then I took it into a slimey bohemian basement in the suburbs where squid-peopled helped me glue an eighth spine on it. You know, for... science?
Why did I do that part? I think I saw the option and assumed it was useful somehow?So I kinda let it sit in that state for a few weeks because it needs 8 skulls, and skulls are the one body part I don't have piles of. I also just had no idea how to use this thing - clearly it was valuable, or at least expensive to make. Who would buy it?
Ah, a bizarrely wealthy author of gothic tales, perfect! She'd pay in scrip, which meant I could invest some scrip in buying 8 skulls. Giant bird skulls? No no, we're long past any sort of authenticity, I bought sabre-cat skulls. Because they met the buyer's desires of antiquity and menace. I think the thighs I attached were from a dinosaur, maybe, so that's a nice coincidence of taxonomy.
I don't know of any dinosaurs that walked on three legs with one pincer-arm. It... it was the best way to balance the antiquity and menace, see, and also I wanted to see if the buyer would go for it. Apparently limbs are anything-goes with chimera, so it was "fine". To her credit it was actually very difficult to convince her that this monstrosity ever existed - but apparently some people really want to believe in bygone monsters.
For my trouble I made a decent profit in scrip (after expenses) and a heaping pile of "stygian ivory". I also reached a market exhaustion level of "Depleted for Two to Three Weeks, But You Certainly Impressed Them". Those are real-life weeks, ehehe. That suits me fine. I'm just... kinda reeling with how incredibly cynical this game's depiction of paleontology is. Dredging up murder victims really is about as authentic as it gets, here, and even there you have to fake their skulls.
It is pretty funny though, and obviously inspired by real
bestiaries. Like, it's fine to recount stories, but it's amazing what was stated as fact:
Near the town of Lisbon, mares stand facing a west wind and conceive a foal from it; such colts are very swift but only live three years.
Okay ramble done. Fallen London