You guys finally get to see what a failed sanity check looks like!
Hmmm...Doctoring. Another hat to add to my ever expanding stack! Purchase the Kit and do general UPGRADES on...anyone's equipment that demands upgrades
You buy the kit and the mask. Now you look reeeeeally scary. You get back to the ship to see if anyone wants upgrades to their stuff.
"All right, why don't you kids do maintenance on those cannons, make sure they're in working order," Ax said. "I gotta go talk to our resident expert." He went to go find Riccto, and ask him if he could upgrade the cannons in some manner such as making them all fire from a single control panel, or at least increase their damage output.
The cannons are all in good condition. You call the Alchemist over and ask him if he can improve anything. Hmmm... He calls Iali over to help. (4+1) (4+1) (sanity:3) That's a really good control panel! +1 to usefulness. (power:5) You can now control the reloading, aiming, and firing of the cannons. Wow. (size:1) And it's a remote that fits in your pocket. That's impressive. But you get a -1 to accuracy because it's kind of hard to aim. (usefulness:5+1) And it will never break. Ever. (efficiency:4) You make the cannons reload speed faster too. 2 shots per cannon per turn! You guys are way too good at making weapons. And Schilcote takes the remote from you.
Have someone fix up my injuries.
You call the alchemist/doctor/mad scientist over to heal you. (6+1) He fixes you really well! And since he was using SCIENCE! (sanity:1) He gives you a few... Upgrades. (6+1) Like an extra pair of arms. That are built-in to your flesh. With weapons. +1 to power, usefulness, efficiency. (power:2+1) Alright, it's like having an extra pair of arms. With retractable claws. (size:2) They're a little small, but not enough that it matters. (usefulness:5+1) Oh, and they'll never break, even if you use them to block large chunks of metal. (efficiency:5+1) And they run off of your body's excess heat. So you don't actually need to refuel them. Does this go in mutations or inventory? Ah, I'll put it in inventory.
Fin' me a stoore tha' selle's da' turre'ts. Iffen not, a cannon migh't dew.
(1) The people in this town really hate you guys. Do you know how much damage flaming pirate ships cause if they smash into a house? You get kicked off of the island and back to Emet. Nobody here wants to see you again. And Schilcote won't let you take a cannon. Man... That's not fair...
I smash the evil dagger, somehow destroy the evil altars (or at least deface them), then loot gold, in that order. If there's trouble, I go intangible. There is nothing wrong about using an evil cult's gold, so long as it's used for the fight against Evil.
"For Imho! Again!" You run up and try to smash the dagger. (1) And you fall on top of it. And it is somehow pointing straight up. (damage:6-1) AAAAAGH! Your chest! That is the painfulness! (1) And you feel a dark presence encroaching on the edge of your soul. A demonic voice says, "
Hmm... You will do nicely... A fallen Paladin is the best kind of servant... I command you to serve ME, Rnarsthoth, demon lord of incompetence!" You here a familiar annoying voice, "
No! Foul beast, you will not have my knight's body! Prepare to duel!" (6-1 vs 4+1) This is an unpleasant situation. Imho and Rnarsthoth have apparently
both claimed you as their champion. Huh. Bad Luck Paladin indeed. You now have the power of incompetence and annoyance! You decide,
Screw it. and go to find the ship. You are immediately spotted by the townsfolk, who throw you at Emet. You land on the deck. And now you project an aura of annoying incompetence. Everyone wants to punch you in the face.
Set a course for PLOT!
It is too hot in here. I am dizzy.
To the Seven Vortices! (4+1) To ludicrous speed! Other ship whip by as you hurtle through the air plane at insane velocities. (3+1) And you manage to find the Vortices! And the school of Planejumpers there! (1) And the pirate armada attacking them! This is bad... (6) At least the pirates haven't seen you yet...
Statuses:
Species: Mutant
Description: A "Being" That stands like a man, the size of a man, but covered with horrible burns and an alchemists robe
Profession: Alchemist/Mad Scientest
Background: He once was a man. Atleast he thinks so. But what he does remember is his knack for mixing up chemicals and herbs, always trying to find that perfect mix. But he has suffered his fair share of accidents in the lab
Home Plane: Astral Plane
Abilities:
Master Alchemist,
Mad Alchemist,
Astral Denizen,
Well-ReadMutations:
Alchemical Immunities,
Four Arms,
Inventory:
Bottle Sling,
Good Chemistry Set,
Leather Robes,
Phial of enchanted gas,
Doctor's Bag, Plague Doctor Mask, Iron Dagger, 5 gp
Spells:
Spined HandsName: Axolisin Sathael. He prefers being called Ax or Sin since he thinks it's awesome.
Species: Tiefling
Description: Short, pale, and skinny. He stands about 5'5 and 120 pounds. His hair and eyes are pure black and his pure white skin has light gray spots across it. His horns are goat-like. He spends a lot of time moping and figures since he's just so mistreated he can do whatever he wants.
Profession: Thief
Background: He's been kicked around his entire life as you might expect and resorted to thievery since Tieflings are branded as thieves and untrustworthy anyway. He's very small time and hasn't progressed much beyond mugging, purse stealing, pickpocketing, and robbing the poor.
Home Plane: Plane of Shadow
Inventory:
Steel Daggers,
Throwing Daggers,
Cheap Lockpicks,
Black Leather Armor,
Magic Ring, 150 gp
Abilities:
Burglar,
Good Eyes,
Denizen of ShadowHealth: Fine
Species: Golem
Description: Created as a result of DRUNK THAUMATOLOGY!. Was intended to have humanlike personality and intellgence. Doesn't talk much, but isn't stupid. Has no goals of his own besides survival, goes around helping people with various things for lack of a better purpose. Will do anything asked of him unless he has a reason not to (if it conflicts with an existing goal or his basic morality). Lawful Good (as in lawful as the opposite of chaotic). Extremely logical and unemotional. Dislikes entropic behavior. Is good with machines (clockwork and a bit of early steam power, I guess).
When he does talk, it sounds something like the above paragraph.
Profession: None. See above. Requires no food and builds his own shelter, and has very little interest in material goods.
Background: See description.
Home Plane: Material Plane.
Inventory:
Iron Maul,
Toolkit, 15 gp,
Magitek ManualsAbilities:
Pneumatic Joints,
Simple Personality,
Material Plane Denizen,
Oh Captain My Captain,
Cannon RemoteHealth: Fine
Species: Mutant
Description: An ugly looking mutant who hates most people. Permanantly disguised as a beautiful woman.
Profession: A guard to a local inn.
Background: Created in a magic experiment gone wrong, he escaped and decided to live his live in a nearby city.
Home Plane: Material Plane
Mutations:
Rhinocerous Skin,
Claw HandsAbilities:
Alcoholism,
Brawler,
Material Plane Denizen,
Curse of BeautyInventory:
Half-Brick in a Sock, 3 Empty Beer Bottles,
Concealing clothes,
Cursed Brass Knuckles,
Bionic ArmsThis character brought to you thanks to the wonderful racial descriptions.
Species: Aasimar
Description: Lawful Neutral, almost Lawful Stupid. He firmly believes in the tenets of his faith, and is willing to die to uphold them.
Profession: Paladin.
Background: His people believe themselves to be the only true guardians of the material plane; the best way to help the mortal inhabitants of said plane is by not touching anything. Obviously this is what The Creator had in mind, and any who meddle in the plane, and therefore blaspheme The Creator, are to be punished severely.
After three decades of military service (doing nothing), he has been sent out as a sort of test to determine the extent of the planer distortion, fix it if possible, find the perpetrators, deliver justice, then report back.
Home Plane: Ethereal Plane.
Abilities:
Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking,
Righteous Fury,
Ethereal Denizen,
Avatar of Imho and RnarsthothInventory:
Holy Longsword,
Mass-Produced Holy Symbol,
Full Plate Armor,
Enchanted Ring, 50 gp
Name: Jo'Ldza (Big Jo)
Species: Orc
Description: We'sn orcs may be deesa jerks, but we's still hassda jobs. I'mn A big ork. Got'sa bald head, with red eyes and wella build a'ms. I'sa been a kaptain for more dan' twenn'y yea's. I 'elp keep the balance wit' mah krew.
Profession: Kaptain of an orc sailing ship
Background: Grew up on a sailing boat with his brother, who was also a kaptain. inherited kaptain'ism and crew from his brother when he died.
Home Plane: Water Plane
Abilities:
Sailor,
Swashbuckler Water Plane Denizen,
Dinghy PilotInventory:
Rapier,
Grappling Hook,
Pirate Outfit,
Magic Coin Necklace,
Paralyzing Poison (4 uses), 20 gp
Allies:
You kind of made his house into your flying machine, so he decided to tag along. He is now going all fangirl over Schilcote, who he sees as almost a demigod of mechanics.
Abilities:
Master Mechanic,
Old ManInventory: The entire contents of his house, which you made into a flying machine.
You saved them from some pirates. Yay!
Abilities:
Powder Monkeys,
Kids,
Air Plane NativesInventory:Clothes
Vehicles:
The house part belongs to the gnome mechanic, the flying mechanism belongs to Schilcote, the fueling system was made by Riccto. It runs on air and can easily break the sound barrier. It will almost never break. Schilcote can planejump the ship, but will have -1 on all actions in the next turn.
First floor: Workshop, door outside, kitchen
Second Floor: Nirur's room (one cannon - left), Spare bedroom (one cannon - right), Engine room
Third floor: Spare bedroom, cockpit (two cannons - forward), Iali Boltcut's room, ladder to roof
Roof:
Pouting TieflingAx's "room",
Badass FlameTurret, Two swivelling cannons
Bought by Schilcote to keep Big Jo happy. Flies as fast as you can row it (with the orc alone? Pretty fast.), enchantment is permanent.