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[noah22223]

You are asshole.
You hate all that are around you, and you like to make them know it.
You are also own a submarine armed with Torpedo's and AA Guns.
What do you do?

[NewsMuffin]

Protect my only child from the horrors outside of my own ego.
If I don't have an only child, PRODUCE ONE.

[noah22223]

You look for your only child.
He has not been fed for 3 days, and has little clean water.
You convince him you are protecting him.

[rarborman]

Give him some food, tell him to eat it slow you dont want the little shit for brains to choke, yet...

[noah22223]

You give him a piece of pizza.
He eats it slowly, savoring it.
He is the only thing you don't hate, other then Vests.
Also, your name is...?

[noah22223]

You walk outside.
You be an asshole to the nearest woman.
"Hey, bitch. Make my dinner!"
"Fuck you."
Walking away, you say.
"Damn feminists..."

[rarborman]

Richard Dean Anderson go gogogogogogogo!

[noah22223]

You try your hardest to imagine yourself as a blonde actor who was born in 1950.
You fail.

[jetex1911]

What? Oh yeah, your name was Francis, and you hate everything... EVERYTHING BUT VESTS.

[noah22223]

You realize that your name is Francis.
You now hate your name.
You gained a hate level!
Hate Level: 99
Shotgun Using Level: 99
Child Raising Level: -99
Relationship Level: 0

[jetex1911]

Cause the zombie apocolypse, because you hate perfect society.

[Phantom]

Commence training in the Art of Dickery.

[noah22223]

You throw an Instant Apocalypse Kit outside, and it infects someone. Give him 4 weeks, and the apocalypse will begin...
You train in the Art of Dickery for 1 week.
ZOMBIES ETA 3 WEEKS.

[Phantom]

Fail to hate that awesome vest you wear.

Use your Dickery to make an extremely convoluted but working plan to make the president of Canada yell "I LOVE BIG DICKS." into a microphone in front of a crowd.

[noah22223]

You just Can't hate this awesome vest you are wearing!
You spend 2 weeks creating a perfect plan to make the president of Canada yell "I LOVE BIG DICKS" into a crowd by telling him he will get candy if he does so.
It works.
You realize you will need a weapon for the apocalypse coming, so you go to the Conveniently Placed Gun Shop.
They have...
Shotgun
Assault Rifle
Hunting Rifle
Shotgun
Shotgun
Shotgun
Shotgun
Shotgun
Shotgun
Auto Shotgun.