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[ProbablyRed]

Pull the 'self destruct' lever and flood the fort with magma.

WWUD while the fort is getting flooded with magma?

[IncompetentFortressMaker]

Take an accidental magma bath.

WWUD after taking a magma bath?

[King Zultan]

Start screaming about how his skin and fat melted off.

WWUD after losing all his skin and fat?

[Olith McHuman]

Urist feels satisfaction after meeting his weight loss goal.

WWUD if the doctor had no actual medical skills?

[IncompetentFortressMaker]

Drink booze to remedy his wounds.

WWUD after drinking booze?

[A_Curious_Cat]

Complain that there wasn't any booze left.








What would Urist do if the Overseer told him to make more booze because the fortress was all out of it?

[IncompetentFortressMaker]

Do his best to make booze and spectacularly fail. The still Urist was using has now exploded, throwing shrapnel everywhere - including a sliver of rock through Urist's beard!

WWUD about the sliver of rock in his beard?

[Olith McHuman]

His fake beard falls off - Urist is an elvin spy! (as if failing to brew booze wasn't enough of a clue)

WWUD if an elvin spy blew up the still?

[A_Curious_Cat]

Smile to himself that he was able to provide the new (and suspiciously thin) brewer with bars of charcoal, and boulders of brimstone and saltpeter, just like Friend Assembly of Mechanisms and Axles told him to.  After all, Friend Assembly of Mechanisms and Axles is always right!

What would Urist do if a collection of Mechanisms and Axles started telling him what to do?

[King Zultan]

He would obey them as they are his god.

WWUD if he found out another dwarf was being bossed around by mechanisms and axles?

[IncompetentFortressMaker]

Give the mechanisms and axles a talking-to, or try to.

WWUD after trying to give mechanisms and axles a talking-to?

[Naturegirl1999]

Be persuaded to find more axles and mechanisms to add, improving their mind
WWUD if the dwarf who tried to talk to the Friendly Mechanisms and Axles proceeded to go look for more mechanisms and axles to help Friendly grow?

[Blomquistador]

Burn all the wood trinkets the Elves lost upon being slaughered donated in order to forge some metal mechanisms and axles for Friendly; thus creating the most powerful hivemind in existence.

WWUD if Friendly Mechanisms and Axles then began to demand that he feed the cats booze?

[IncompetentFortressMaker]

Comply with their demands. The result? A fortress's worth of drunk cats.

WWUD about a fortress's worth of drunk cats?

[Eric Blank]

Go insane from cleaning up vomit and dead, rotten cats all day.

Wwud with annoying spam humans