Gendo's Diary: Entry 2
It's been a while since I wrote in this. I figured it was time I tried it again; after the last disaster our main X-COM base has been in disarray attempting to form another cohesive unit to combat the alien threats. However, our Team-GAUX base has no such trouble. I've interviewed the various recruits, and will record the discussions here for posterity.
: Well, well, it's been a long time Mr. Williams. Tell me, were you intentionally AWOL, or just in a convenient coma?
: Neither, sir! It's been a long journey getting to a base out in North Africa! I even brought a friend!
: Sup.
: Very well, despite the free-loader you brought I'm willing to take you back. But as punishment, you're being re-assigned to the GAUX Initiative.
: What is GAUX, sir?
: Hm? Oh, nothing, nothing...
: Welcome to X-COM, Mr. Ciaphas.
: My name is Caiphas Cain.
: And I'm Director Doesn't-Give-A-Shit, now take your rifle and head to the barracks.
: W-what?! I was told I would be serving more of a... well, a behind-the-scenes sort of purpose!
: And I was told you weren't a whiny bitch, but I guess we're both getting the shaft today. Now get to your post.
: Ati? Is that you?
: Pat.
: Hm?
: It's always been Pat. Sir.
: Well whatever the fuck you are, I'm just glad you know how to wield a rifle. Where did you disappear to anyway?
: Your porn folder on that computer next to you.
: Cute. Now get out of my office before you wind up in the Recycle Bin.
: Your profile checks out, Mr. Cold. Tell me though, what qualifications do you have to work in a team-based unit like the GAUX Initiative's?
: I was a captain on a space station.
: Really? And... how did that go?
: ... Well enough.
: I have obviously heard of X-COM, but have you heard of me? The great Travis Namio? Probably not. There's a difference between being famous and being good. The man that shot JFK? Small fry, no one worth his price in my business would have been caught on that job. I've killed a dozen world leaders, and they never even learned my name. My gun has shot thirteen bullets that sparked wars, my scythe has reaped the heads of hundreds, and I am still unknown. THAT is why you need me, Gendo.
*BANG*
: FUCK! MY LEG!
: You talk too much. Get boastful like that on the field and you're as good as dead. Aliens don't care who you are or what you've done, they only want to end you. So you'd better shape up, shut up, and fall in line if you want to survive past your first outing with Team GAUX. Now get to the medic and get that bullet wound patched up; I expect this will not impede your performance, considering how "great" you are?
: *leaves* gr... bastard...
: Name's Hudson. I hear you've got yourself a bit of an alien problem?
: Did you learn about it before or after they burned down Beijing?
: Hey, don't be like that man! All I'm saying is, you've got some bugs needing squashing, and I'm a bug-hunter by profession, if you catch my drift.
: How adorable, the kid roasts some ants with a magnifying glass and thinks he's ready to take on the hornet's nest. It's your funeral, soldier; grab a rifle and get to the barracks.
:
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!! *spark spark*: ... Welcome to X-COM.
: Sorry about Blanka, bud. He's got some... anger management issues. But it's all coo', I got him handled if you set me up in this place.
: Only if you promise never to talk like that again.
: Hello!
: Goodbye. *stamps the APPROVED seal on his papers* Get out of my office.
: Daddy, we're back!
: *huff, puff* Oh, thank goodness, we're back.
: LIZZY? B-b-b-but I... I saw... WHAT?
: Oh, Daddy! Don't tell me you thought those puny alien weapons could kill the Queen of Darkness!
: Well you certainly could have told me there was a recovery period first! And Cube what the hell is this form with your name here for?
: Well, sir, it's both your job and mine to take care of Lizzy, and if she's going to be out on the frontlines, I need to make sure she's safe personally!
: Fine, fine. But in your absence Quibble will be taking over as my butler, and I think we both know how that's going to turn out.
:
QUIBBLE!One surprise came when that blasted cube of his actually came in handy. We were able to revive (albeit in weaker shape) one of our top operatives for the GAUX Initiative.
: What the... Hey, I'm alive! Who did this??
: Hello, Stitch. I guess you've been re-drafted.
: AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
: Wait, aren't you from the same place as that crazy Browncoat?
: WHAT? Never! I'm with the Coalition, and I'd never stoop so low as to work with a Browncoat!
: White mask, Brown Coat, I really don't care, you're all wearing Red Shirts in X-COM. So in the name of equality, go get your ass handed to you by a Sectoid.
That was all of the recruits I had available to me. I don't know how long they'll last, but they may be humanity's only hope until the main X-COM base is up and running again...
Gendo's reaction to these characters in no way reflects my view of various forumites.
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Topic: X-COM Genesis Evangelion -- A Poorly Thought-Out X-COM LP! (Read 85064 times)