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[Supermikhail]

They called him about the thing at work.

“This is agent Johnson, FBI,” the caller introduced himself. He had a confident, smooth baritone that made Rick tense. Without waiting for Rick's reply, the agent continued, “You are aware of the incident at your apartment?”

Rick confessed that he wasn't.

“Something has happened at your apartment today. Something that we consider potentially a matter of national importance.”

Rick exhaled, exasperated at the ambiguity. The agent mercifully gave him a moment to make the necessary inferences, creating a rush of quite disturbing images in Rick's head.

“What...”

Rick's attempt to speak was cut short by the agent.

“We would really appreciate it if you didn't speak to other people about this.”

“Is my dad there?” Rick almost shouted into the phone.

“Yes, he's there, and he's alright. The matter doesn't involve any harm to people.”

“And my cat?”

There was a short silence on the other end.

“Your cat is alright. Also your girlfriend. Mr. Bhatti, would you be able to go home right now?”

“Yes, of course. I mean I hope I can, if I can settle it with the boss.”

“How long will it take you?”

“Two... I mean, I could make it in an hour. It's working hours after all.”

“Good.”

The caller hung up.

Rick stood staring into the distance, trying to make out what the hell just happened. He felt it in his guts that this national importance didn't promise anything good to him.

[malkomk]

Don't leave me in suspence, please! I kind of like this...

[Vertigon]

Was that a chapter or a teaser? Because if it was a chapter, it was pitifully short.

[Supermikhail]

That was... a snippet. Long story short, I found myself here, and they made me obsessed with 300-word snippets. I guess now I'm also a lifelong fan of collaborative writing. Have another bit. Can't say what my update schedule is going to be, as I don't have a backburner.

Rick was awoken from his musing by the secretary woman.

“Got into trouble, Mr. Bhatti?” she said squinting at him.

Rick squinted back and, ignoring her question, said, “Director in?”

The secretary nodded grimly.

Rick peeked through the director's door. The director, Mr. Segura, was looking through some documents at his table.

Mr. Segura considered Rick's request amicably, but asked, “He didn't tell you what it was?”

“No,” Rick said apologetically.

“Well, I hope it's nothing serious.” Mr. Segura paused. “That'll be shorter hours today.”

Screw this national importance, Rick thought, but said nothing.

When he was going home, there was a news story on the Underground TV: A Concrete Cancer, they called it. A fly-by showed an apt building that had its wall as if swollen in a place. “If you look closer, you can see that it has this sort of organic texture,” the reporter said, and the camera zoomed in. An ornament of vein-like bluish curves decorated the ivory surface of the swelling. It seemed to naturally grow out of the concrete surface of the wall, burrowing into it with wire-like tendrils. “As of this time the authorities have offered no explanation on the nature and origins of this suspiciously cancer-like formation.” The camera turned down and showed a bunch of government cars near one of the entrances of the building. “Can it be a sign warning us about the consequences of our tampering with nature?”

Sign by whom? Rick quipped to himself. As the camera zoomed out at the end of the story, he suddenly recognized his block in the layout of the buildings. The abomination spread its feelers next to his home! Among fear and disgust Rick felt relief at finding out about the “incident” himself, and calming satisfaction that agent Johnson's secret got released through no fault of his.

[Supermikhail]

Rick didn't make it home. Several blocks away he faced a red-and-white tape barrier, and several army guys barring the passage down the street. A small mob of bystanders gathered next to the blockade, along with a TV-reporter and crew. Rick got closer to the barrier. The city beyond it was still and quiet.

"What the hell is going on?" he said half-to-himself.

"They're evacuatin' everybody, but no one knows for sure why," an old guy with a mustache and overalls said. "There's been talk it's a terrorist bio-weapon. Weapon-shwepon. I bet it's another government fuck-up. Our tax dollars at work, while they could be makin' new medicines..."

Rick got out his phone and, with some apprehension, dialled Amanda, the girl that woke up in his bed this morning. Nobody picked up for quite a while. Then he heard a familiar male voice.

"Hello," the voice said.

Rick recognized agent Johnson's powerful tone. "You! Where's Amanda?"

It took the agent a moment to recall Rick. "Oh, Mr. Bhatti. Things have changed a bit since we last talked. Now we're evacuating everybody."

"Because of that thing?" Rick said.

"You've seen... Yes, but your relatives are alright. They got out first. They went to the Saint-Michael Hospital... I mean your father and your girlfriend. She forgot her phone here."

"Why did they go to a hospital?"

"Well, they need to check'em, they've been in contact with this thing. Ah..." Johnson paused. "And the cat went with them."

"Thanks," Rick said glumly, and hung up.

He took a moment to think about having no home to go back to, then turned and marched back.

[Supermikhail]

St. Michael's Hospital's entrance was completely obscured by a row of buses and a military-looking ambulance car. A bunch of folks stood next to them talking on their phones agressively. Rick waded through their midst and went up the marble stairs of front porch. His dad was crouching against the hospital's wall holding Tucky, their cat. Dad's black hair was ruffled just a bit more than usual and his face showed weariness.

"Hi, Dad," Rick said.

"Hi, Rick." Dad's face brightened up a bit.

"What's going on?"

Dad got up with a crunch. Tucky stoically bore the upheaval.

"Do you believe in gods?"

Rick stared at the sincere face of Dad. "Uhm. What does it have to do with anything?"

Dad lowered his eyes. "Yes..." He stroked Tucky. "They said it was a terrorist thing. But it didn't do anything. It just was there, grew there. Then the FBI came and started measuring it. I guess they got something. So they got everyone out of there."

"Did you actually see it?" Rick said.

"Yes..."

The hospital's door opened, and a non-personnel woman called, "Mr. Bhatti!"

"Yes?" Rick and Dad said simultaneously.

The woman gave them a brief glance. "They want you about that mute girl." The woman disappeared back inside.

"Who?" Rick asked Dad.

"That girl... Your girl. I couldn't remember her name, you should go tell it to them. I will stay here. They didn't wan't to let me stay with Tucky..."

"Wait-wait! Amanda isn't mute. At least she wasn't this morning..." A terrible realisation struck Rick. "So it is a weapon! It did it, right?"

Dad srugged. "You should go."

"Fuck!" Rick said and walked towards the door.

[fqllve]

I don't think there's anything wrong with you're writing. It's very readable and transparent which is good because you're writing in such short snippets.

The only thing that I noticed was this.

When he was going home, there was a news story on the Underground TV: A Concrete Cancer, they called it.

Where exactly was he watching the television?

[Supermikhail]

Oh, fiddlesticks. I knew I hadn't heard it where I should have. It probably should be Subway TV. Living in Russia, I'm a bit vague on how people call it in the USA. But Rick was watching TV on a subway train... It may not be it, but I felt that it was a nice futuristic element.

Edit: Readable, but not very engaging, I assume? I mean if it was then someone would have noted the TV thing earlier. Sigh. Well I'll keep on trucking, because this format is pretty challenging. And also it feels good when every time you sit down to write something significant happens in your writing... Just try it.

[fqllve]

Ah, yeah I think underground is a chiefly British thing while we call it a subway here in the states. You might just make a passing mention of the train he's on so it'd be clear for everyone. If it's set in the US I'd probably go with subway though.

And I dunno, I found it engaging, I read the whole thing after all. It might just be that no one else noticed it. It is a relatively small thing.

[Supermikhail]

Like your poetry... Er. Hm. Yeah, I read the first poem (at least I think I did completely), but I can't make myself interested enough in ordinary poetry, so such avantgarde stuff completely stumbles my brain.

vvvHere me writing again. And screw it, went over my word limit. Can't cut anything, and don't want to drop mid-dialog. Also I wrote it already, don't want to leave half-a-snippet for later.


Rick halted at the threshold of the lobby, startled at the number of people there. Men, women and children sat and stood along walls, talked and argued with the personnel, paced up and down the lobby. Some government suits were working on the situation, by talking and arguing with the personnel, and, it seemed to Rick, helped little. Among the noise and commotion Rick tried in vain to recognize the woman that called "Mr. Bhatti" inside, or see anybody with interest in him. He waded through the whirlpool towards the clerk desk, though there didn't seem to be much hope there. All clerks were busy with phone calls, queues of patients, and emergency arrivals. Rick pushed a bit. Then he saw Bill Carter, his neighbor, in one of the queues. Rick came closer.

"Hey, Bill."

"Hey, Rick," Bill said without enthusiasm.

"You know what's going on?" Rick said. "A fed called me when I was at work, and while I was going home they already called the evacuation. I met my dad outside, and he talks in puzzles. Although I saw something on TV. Is it that bad?"

Walking on to keep up with the queue, Bill scratched his head uncomfortably. "Well, I haven't seen much myself. I was sleeping after my night shift when the FBI came, then it got hard to keep asleep. You know what I mean." Bill looked away. "There was some weird shit at your place, Rick. I got a peek - there was this weird shining, like a fire glow, but without flicker, eerie."

"So it was... is... right at my place?" Rick asked making a last effort to fend off the inevitable triumph of fate.

"Yes."

Rick shuffled after Bill in silence. Then a realization struck him, and suddenly his armpits were drenched in sweat.

"Bill, did they check you for radiation?"

Bill thought for a moment. "No, I don't think so."

Rick felt some relief, but couldn't relax completely. What if that was it, something kept whispering to him.

"Mr. Bhatti!" A strong female voice cut through the din. "Somebody call him, for Christ's sake. I can't hold this girl here forever."

Rick quickly turned around and located the speaker who turned out to be a small black woman.

"I am Bhatti."

[Supermikhail]

The woman gave Rick a heavy stare, then said, "Okay. Come in." She turned and entered an open door behind her. Rick followed.

"Are you a husband?" the woman asked when Rick shut the door and the commotion.

"No. We've slept together for about a week, I guess I'm kind of like her boyfriend." Rick shrugged.

"I see," the woman said with a sigh. "Well, as long as you can ID her?"

"Is she already dead?!" Rick stepped back. "They talked only about being mute..."

"No."

The woman opened a door into an adjacent room. A bush of blonde hair greeted Rick above a chair back. He thought how he would come and kiss the girl right on the top of her head, breath in the smell of her shampoo - in different circumstances.

"Babe?"

She sat with a straight back, rigid, her hands on her thighs, her eyes on an invisible object beyond the wall in front of her. Rick crouched beside her, placing his hand over hers, and felt no response.

"Ame?" Rick turned to the hospital woman. "What's wrong with her?"

The woman, her arms folded on her stomach, said, "I think she's been raped. Unless that's you."

Rick felt his heartbeat quicken. "No. It's been all mutual between us... And we didn't have sex today. I had to go to work and she..." Rick looked at the statue in the chair. "Amanda?"

"I'm sorry," the hospital woman said. "Could you tell me her name please."

Rick got up and followed the woman to her desk with a computer.

"Can't you find her in you database or something?" he asked.

"No, we're still recovering from an outage this morning?"

"Is it because of that thing..." Rick let the line hang, lacking a proper name.

"They don't know."

Rick told the woman everything he knew about Amanda, which wasn't much. The woman then managed to find Amanda's mother's phone number in a phone database.

"Would you like to call her parents?"

"Uhm," Rick said awkwardly. "We've never met, I don't think..."

"Alright," the hospital woman said. She dialled the number.