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[Yoink]

Right. So the above-ground portion of my fort, as well as the caverns, are being completely overrun by a ridiculously huge goblin army. The few dwarves left above ground are dying horribly, as the bulk of my population hide in the halls carved out beneath the river. In the basement of one of my above-ground buildings, this one dwarf, Cerol Vucarnicat, a recently-migrated miller, is being strangled simultaneously by SIX TROLLS. I look in the combat report... And he has OVER SEVENTY-THREE (the report obviously lost count, I guess) PAGES of being strangled, as well as the occasional few punches and gorings, or a troll snapping his limps like dry twigs. AND HE IS STILL ALIVE!
So I drafted one of the other guys trapped out side of the safe area, a gem cutter named Libash Edimzaneg, and he grabs up the nearest axe, runs up the stairs and starts hacking into these trolls from behind(While half of them are passed-out from over-exertion!!) as they continue strangling the miller. Holy cow. That's insane... And awesome!

[darkrider2]

This is an engraving of the dwarf Cerol Vucarnicat, the troll Nordon Mikeli, and the dwarf Libash Edimzaneg. Cerol Vucarnicat is in the fetal position. The Nordon Mikeli is striking a menacing pose. Libash Edimzaneg is laughing.

and right next to it...

This is an engraving of cheese. The cheese is delicious.

[Krelos]

Cerol Vucarnicat - Legendary Victim.

[Yoink]

Lol, yeah. He's still going, 76 pages and counting...
Man, I know trolls are stupid, but I didn't know they were THIS stupid...
So they kept strangling poor Cerol as the newly-drafted axedwarf chopped bits off them. A few of them decided they didn't like this treatment, so they ran a few meters away and are now standing there, just watching as Libash batters away at their buddies... Trolls are stupid.

[Nagassh]

Lol, yeah. He's still going, 76 pages and counting...
Man, I know trolls are stupid, but I didn't know they were THIS stupid...
So they kept strangling poor Cerol as the newly-drafted axedwarf chopped bits off them.

Well ofcourse they are, imagine what the little devil will do in revenge if he's ever NOT being throttled.

[Yoink]

Holy ****, this is getting ridiculous!! Well, it was already ridiculous, but it's become even moreso!
Well, after a while of that, Libash managed to kill one troll and cut bits off a few others. I imagine that would have gone on for a long time, but a band of goblins, one of the four-or-so squads in the attack, stumbled upon the scene and quickly killed poor, brave old Libash.
I pretty much just dismissed Cerol as dead, and went back to overseeing the survival of my dwarves locked away in the dining room. But a while later I checked back, to see how much damage Libash had inflicted on the trolls, and...
The crazy ****er is still alive! By Armok! I'm stunned for a moment, then I look at the combat report... All the old logs are gone, replaced by ONE HUNDERED AND FOURTY-FOUR pages of a combined force of the remaining four trolls and, if I count right, about TWENTY-NINE goblins! INCLUDING a spearmaster and swordsmaster!?!!

Surely that's not possible, but it's happening... Look:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Wow. Just wow. And get this, he's still conscious!! The health screen only lists Heavy Bleeding, Exhausted, Winded, Cannot Breathe, Ability to Stand Lost and Ability to Grasp Lost. Not unconscious. :O
Wow. This guy is freaking amazing. I wish there was some way I could rescue him, but I doubt it's possible with all those goblins... Do you guys think I should save my game, and launch some desperate rescue attempt?

[Krelos]

It would be nice to save him, but you'd probably need a team of legendary-everything doctors to keep him alive after all those wounds.

[Sutremaine]

If you want a tomb for him, assign him a coffin now. You can't do it after death.

[Keldane]

Please tell me you intend to pave his name in gold on the surface of your embark.

I say why not? Save, then launch a rescue attempt. He will likely be a permanent hospital resident, but if you arrange things right and he survives, you might be able to get him elected mayor. I vote for entombing him alive in a vast structure made of valuable metals with about a fifth the fort's population permanently dedicated to keeping him alive - doctors, farmers, brewers, and personal honor guard, who never leave the golden tomb.

[Yoink]

Sounds like a plan!
But first I've just gotta deal with these pesky goblins, and their forgotten-beast leader...
Well, I forsee savesumming. Let's DO this!

[Oliolli]

Let's DO this!

UUUURIIIIISTTT McLEEEEROOOOYYYYYJEEEEENKIIIIIIINSSSSSS!!!!

[Fredd]

Always remember, futility is a keystone of the dwarven way of life

[NightS]

Sit him on a golden throne and call him the emperor of dwarfkind, he deserves it. Also, give him souls to eat.

[Mister Always]

Sit him on a golden throne and call him the emperor of dwarfkind, he deserves it. Also, give him souls to eat.

Where you gonna get souls? Dwarves don't have 'em (obviously), elves don't have 'em ('cuz they're pussies), goblins don't have 'em, and killing humans just to feed their souls to some ponce on a golden chair seems excessive.

[GamerKnight]

In DF souls are harvested from the skulls of Elves. Elves don't have souls, it's just that Elf skulls are comfy for the souls.

EDIT: Also, have you read the description? This guy deserves a harem of five thousand dwarven, elven, human and goblin women. Get to work on that, Yoink.