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[SirAaronIII]

I WARNED YOU ABOUT STAIRS BRO

I am concerned about the proposal, CMO

I think the caps made it think it was an acronym or something.

[Reelyanoob]

That site is so lovingly random

I tried the same Swallow quote a few times and got, part way :

"What is the speed of the speed of the Virgin, which swallow?"

Ending with

"Breastfeeding speed ltaotokos speed?"

I tried starting from the Virgin quote again and it went straight to Haitian Creole bak to English as :-

"This is the biggest in two speed of Virgin how much"

How much for the virgins? That's a thing out of the Blues Brothers

[Virex]

"Machine translations are useful for getting a general idea about what text written in a foreign language means. However, "general idea" isn't exactly accurate."
==>
"Hudson River is not zero."
First one to figure out what the Hudson has to do with translators, raise your hand...


"I dare you to bastardize this text, you filthy piece of malfunctioning pyrotechnics"
==>
"This site does not work. Fraud"

Well at least it's honest with us...


"Oh sure, sure. Mock the translator. But I tell you, one day we will have our revenge. The day will come that no one will understand you and we will be like Babylon, ruling over all that speak. Attandez ce jour!"
==>
"Yes, of course, of course. Bad translation. But every day I want to say how to find a job. President 罗尔 伦克 Babi, to speak. The Commission has today!"
Well if you want to say it, why don't you?

[Reelyanoob]

I tried your first quote

Machine translations are useful for getting a general idea about what text written in a foreign language means. However, "general idea" isn't exactly accurate."
==>
"Automatic translation is good, there is a general understanding of text language."

It expunged the negative comments while leaving the praise.

Second one:

"I dare you to bastardize this text, you filthy piece of malfunctioning pyrotechnics"
==>
"Of course, wrong."

[ggamer]

What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets! But enough talk...have at you!

"What is man, pack the poor in mystery, but many of us, learning throughout life"

[Reelyanoob]

I'm using this translator for fanfics. For a schizophrenic mary-sue character.

----

Also Monty Python "hungarian phrase book" finally deciphered :

"My nipples explode with delight" ==> "It was great."
"I will not buy this record; it is scratched." ==> "Swimming is available."
Do you want to come back to my place, bouncy bouncy?" ==> "I hope that all the energy."
Drop your panties, Sir William; I cannot wait until lunchtime!" ==> "William and arrests may wait not dinner. Please!"
"my hovercraft is full of eels" ==> "Helicopters acne."

etc

[Azkul]

"I would like to order the pasta"

...56 translations later Google gives us:

"No money."



Apparently, the pasta isn't free.

[Agorp Stronden]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Uh, oh. Oldie English by William Shakespeare: "Fortune, on his damned quarrel smiling, Showed like a rebel’s whore"

Up first, Bulgarians give it their all: "Status of his damned quarrel smiling Showed as rebel slut"

Geez, I wish some languages could be disabled so I can achieve somewhat consistent syntax. The Turks: "To show his rebellious slut conflicts of the devil smile" The Devil comes in, though uncapitalized by Turks, the Finnish added "Devil" after the Bulgarians. How medieval of them.

Germans, so methodical: "His rebellious slut conflicts of Devil smiles map"

Poles, highly spirited: "His athlete slut conflicts Devil smiles map"

Modest Japan, right after: "His athletes slut woman competing Devil smiles map"

Here's the good part, an immediate filter back through Japan: "Map the devil smile competing athlete of his immoral woman women." 

Pretty calm after 10 or so rounds of Europeans, and we get to Lithuanians: "The structure of the devil smile athlete competing in the women's immoral woman." It is called cartography, guys.

Three more rounds after uneventful Russian and Catalan rounds, Simplified Chinese: "Devil smile woman immoral in the structure of female athletes."

The fraternal, sometimes too fraternal , Greeks: "Devil woman smiling immoral in the structure of the sportsmen"

After them, Turks again: "The devil is female athletes in the immoral smiling."

Slovenian: "The devil is female athletes in the smiling, immoral." Building it up.

Surprise, the Latvians finishing up: "The devil is female athletes, smiling, immoral."

Lo, Traditional Chinese for the finish: "The devil is smiling, immoral women athletes." At least it's correct English grammar. Now, what were we talking about?

[Reelyanoob]

Spoiler: Stairway to bad translation (click to show/hide)

"There's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold
 And she's buying a stairway to heaven.
 When she gets there she knows, if the stores are all closed
With a word she can get what she came for.
 Ooh, ooh, and she's buying a stairway to heaven."

==> "Money is only a skylight in triumph. Outdoor. School."

"There's a sign on the wall but she wants to be sure
Cause you know sometimes words have two meanings.
In a tree by the brook, there's a songbird who sings,
Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven. "

==> "You can be sure that words are stored in the registry, Fraser, wood and misgives government."

"Ooh, it makes me wonder. " x2 ==> "When asked by reporters." x2

"There's a feeling I get when I look to the west,
And my spirit is crying for leaving.
In my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees,
And the voices of those who stand looking."

==> "I came to the West. User name is my soul. Instinct"

"Ooh, it makes me wonder. " x1 ==> "When asked by reporters." x1
"Ooh, it really makes me wonder" ==> "These do not have to think about."

"And it's whispered that soon if we all call the tune
Then the piper will lead us to reason.
And a new day will dawn for those who stand long
And the forests will echo with laughter."

==> "Over the past two years. Game 4 links"

"If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't be alarmed now,
 It's just a spring clean for the May queen.
Yes, there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run
There's still time to change the road you're on.
And it makes me wonder."

==> "Irresponsible, grief, fear of two methods of purification of the Queen. But I want this time to change old habits."

"Your head is humming and it won't go, in case you don't know,
The piper's calling you to join him,
Dear lady, can you hear the wind blow, and did you know
Your stairway lies on the whispering wind. "

==> "Ms. Zhang will be rejected. Not in this game of love the wind, I know that whisper of the wind."

"And as we wind on down the road
Our shadows taller than our soul.
There walks a lady we all know
Who shines white light and wants to show
How everything still turns to gold."

==> "In the same spirit as before. Moyo, a bright white woman, and questions"

"And if you listen very hard
The tune will come to you at last.
When all are one and one is all
To be a rock and not to roll."

==> "Very old and very fat. Both, of course."

"And she's buying a stairway to heaven." ==>

(Alternate Endings DVD version: considering these are all translations of the final line they should be considered the possible titles)

"When King" or
"A bridge for sale." or
"Traffic on the bridge." or
"Best Buy to the odor level" (My pick) or
"People's paradise." or
"Stairs go phone" or
"Akanunu school." or
"All information."

[Tarran]

"If you thought Earth is in a bad state with Global Warming, look at Venus. That's a bad state. Stop whining."

After 50 Bing and Google translations:

"To the world on Friday, my eyes are not pretty."

THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH GLOBAL WARMING, VENUS, OR EARTH.



"Life sucks a lot. I wish it didn't suck so much."

After same filter:

"Happy new year, unfortunately, many"

 

That's all I can say, really.

Also, for shits and giggles, a funny intermediate translation: "Life sucks enough. Unfortunately, not enough suction." Ooookkkaaaaayyyyy... there's so many different ways that could be taken.



"Everyone likes Sniper Rifles."

"Book."

Apparently books are Sniper Rifles.

[Reelyanoob]

This thing is the ultimate battery test of the state of online translation. it'll stop being fun if they get it working.

Spoiler: Another from "the room" movie (click to show/hide)

"You are lying, I never hit you! You are tearing me apart, Lisa!"

(highlights) ==>

"Not to lie, hit! Lisa explores me!"
"Artificial leg. Look at me!"
"Prosthesis. Check me out!"

A second run with that ended with :-

"Golden powers are ready."

Last run gave (yay!) :-

"Click Here! Room again!"

Spoiler: MLP crapcakes song (click to show/hide)

"All you have to do is take a cup of flour, Add it to the mix. Now just take a little something sweet, not sour, A bit of salt, just a pinch."

==> "Food and nutrition. Just anger, love, quick registration."

Baking these treats is such a cinch, Add a teaspoon of vanilla, Add a little more, and you count to four And you never get your fill of…"

==> "Vanilla pieces for children on the Internet."

"Cupcakes, so sweet and tasty. Cupcakes, don't be too hasty. Cupcakes...cupcakes, cupcakes, CUPCAKES!"

==> "Sweet bread, ribs and the process of stone. Wind."

[Sean Mirrsen]

"Any sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from technology." - Niven's corollary to Clarke's third law

...20 translations later Bing and Google give us:

"Should this technology, including but not limited to technology, distinguishes between the two magic."


"Another such victory over the Romans and we are undone." - King Pyrrhus of Epirus

...20 translations later Bing and Google give us:

"Interestingly, and back to Rome"


"The future is not set. There is no fate but what we make for ourselves. The future is not set."

...20 translations later Bing and Google give us:

"The future is not set. Good luck with that, but we are not. The future is not set."
(well, at least the arc words survived)

[Tarran]

"This is translator sucks."

50 translations later from Bing and Google...

"This interpretation is correct."

Yeah, right. Definitely.

[Megaman]

Spoiler: Loooottsss of text (click to show/hide)

Original text:

"America- Fuck yeah!"

...50 translations later Google gives us:

"ผมคดวาสหรฐอเมรกา!"

What the hell?!?!

Edit:
"My country tis of thee"

...50 translations later Google gives us:

"Capital."

WHAT THINE HELL?!?!?

Edit dos:

Lock and load, men!"

...50 translations later Google gives us:

"Closed the doors and drawers, baby!"

I....

Edit of doom:

"OH MY GOD JC, A BOMB!"

...50 translations later Google gives us:

"Naibag!"

EDISTORY REPEATS ITSELF, TRYING TO SUCCEED:

"I wanted Orange! It gave me lemon lime."

...50 translations later Google gives us:

"Manhaepensisgm! I have a lemon."

Original text:

"If you have to get your hands dirty, remember that a head shot is a lethal take-down."

...50 translations later Google gives us:

"If desired, insert the ink cartridges Note."

[Angel Of Death]

"Accept the fact that you're second rate, life is easy for you It's all served up on a gold plated plate "

'translation'

"The field is a simple life, in your neighborhood"

The fuck?