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[Bobble]

I've played Dwarf Fortress off and on over the past few years and I've gotten a lot of use out of the wiki, utilities, graphics, and helpful advice from this forum.  I thought I'd give a little something back to the DF community. 



RECRUIT URIST
To the tune of MC Hammer's "U Can't Touch This"

Recruit Urist
Recruit Urist
Recruit Urist
Recruit Urist

My-my-my-my hammer hits thee, so hard
Give up my, training sword
Armok, is blessing me
With a war hammer made of adamantine

It feels good, when you know you're down
With the Sunken Thunders of Kingdomcrown
And I'm known, as such
It's better than a bolt-uh!, in the guts

I told you, mayor
Recruit Urist
Yeah, that's how we slayin' and ya know
Recruit Urist
Look at my hammer, man
Recruit Urist
Yo, let me haul some brand new bricks
Recruit Urist

Weaponsmith's, in a trance
Made war hammer, outta green glass
Dolomite door's complete
Can't haul that, gotta go eat
While patrolling, hold on
Sleep a little bit and got a catsplosion
one cat, two cat
see the garbage pit so put 'em on the stack
Happy about my gabbro hutch
And this encrusted, tower-cap crutch

Yo! I told you
Recruit Urist
Why you standing there, dwarf?
Recruit Urist
Yo, sound the alert, trainings on, sucker
Recruit Urist

Put me in a mood, or tantrum
Just one swing, I'm taking off a limb
Now, they know
You're talking about my hammer, not a crossbow
That's might, with bite
Marksdwarfs are running, ain't that a site
Danger room, to learn
From wrestler to hammerdwarf I'll turn
That hurts, a bit
Gotta work hard to be able to hit

It's a siege, so you know
Recruit Urist
Recruit Urist

Digging down!

Pause ... Hammerdwarf

Hot magma flow, it is said
That if you can't move from this, then you probably are dead
Gotta, widen this stair
Trying to get a beer, got six dwarfs to a square
This is it, beginner
Join the squad, or learn to be a spinner
Haul, back from the dump
Just for a minute, let's all man the pump
Pump pump pump

Yeah, Recruit Urist
Caverns?  Recruit Urist
Better find hematite, boy, 'cause you're in for FUN
Recruit Urist
Plump helmets, pack 'em in

Digging down!

Pause ... Hammerdwarf

Recruit Urist
Recruit Urist
Recruit Urist
Recruit Urist

Digging down!

Pause ... Hammerdwarf

Every time you see him, Urist just ain't right
He's puked on the floor, and impaled on a spike
Now why would I ever, stop doing this?
With others using weapons, that just don't hit
Patrolled around the burrow, from magma to the clay
It's hammer, go hammer, hit 'em hammer, yo hammer, I need to rest now right away

Recruit Urist
Recruit Urist
Recruit Urist
Yeah, Recruit Urist
I told you, Recruit Urist
Felsite, Recruit Urist
Yo, we outta here, Recruit Urist

    - Bone Setter Dre and Urist Laggy Lag

[EmperorJon]

 

[Karakzon]

this needs a group of drunks to sing and record it or such.

*this thread is decorated with masterfull lyrics of win*

[Terrahex]

adamantine warhammer?

seems... unpractical.

[Aramco]

adamantine warhammer?

seems... unpractically dwarfy.

[Humaan]

adamantine warhammer?

seems... unpractically dwarfy.

No, really. That hammer is going to be pathetically weak,, due to adamantine being so damn light.

[Aramco]

adamantine warhammer?

seems... unpractically dwarfy.

No, really. That hammer is going to be pathetically weak,, due to adamantine being so damn light.

That's why it's Dwarfy-- you get to beat your enemy down for a longer amount of time.

[Qinetix]

and suprisingly adamantine sucks for blunt weapons

[Halconnen]

So, mp3 download where?

[Anathema]

I think that's the point - adamantine, green glass, both terrible hammer materials - the kind of weapon you give to a hammerer you don't actually want to injure any criminals, or to a useless expert milker rapper migrant-turned-militia.

Also, to the OP.. that's.. impressive, in a slightly frightening way. I guess it suits the community, good contribution.