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Author Topic: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity  (Read 55137 times)

HighEndNoob

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #210 on: April 13, 2011, 03:48:24 pm »
Imbue my Sword with fire, than slash the Butcher in the side
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Quote
(5) You manage to struggle free of the guards and sprint to a safe distance before tossing a knife at one! (5 + 1 = 6) The throwing knife zips through the air, slitting a guard's throat! It then travels around the group of guards like a boomerang. It (5) Slits another throat, (Three 6's in a row!) decapitates three more (!), (4) slices open the last guard's arm, and (2) narrowly misses a random bystander. It then flies back into your hand. Holy crap.

Zrk2

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #211 on: April 14, 2011, 05:59:18 pm »
Shoot the dwarf repeatedly, or until he is dead, whichever comes first.
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Quote from: PTTG?? on May 24, 2012, 12:34:25 pm
He's just keeping up with the Cardassians.

_DivideByZero_

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #212 on: April 17, 2011, 01:28:42 am »
Roll 13

Objective(s):
Police Duty

Location(s):
RidgeWalled - Castle
Barakar - Town (Hawk, Bjorn, Zrk, Sir Fiddle, Tarran, Taric, Porin, Cogs)

Nathaniel 'Hawk' Hawkins-Hawk gets out his pistol and observes the butcher through the scope, looking for a gap in his armor. Eventually, Hawk manages to align the crosshairs and [1] fire, but the shot hits the metal window sill, [2] spraying shrapenel everywhere and alreting the butcher.
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

Porin Keeperechoes-Still in hiding, Porin lashes out from the shadows and strikes the butcher in the leg. The hit [4] digs through the butcher's two layers of iron, but the steel halts the sword completely. Looks like it'll take more than a sword to hurt him.
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

Bjorn Inmus-Bjorn takes his sword out, putting his staff of magic away, and imbuing it with fire. With one hand, he [5] brings the sword down on the butcher's shoulder, synging his skin through the chain mail!
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

Ivan 'Sir Fiddle' Fiddlebottom-"Is this darned thing still in my back?"
"Sure is. Here, let me..."
The shopkeeper [1-1=0] yanks the shard out, causing excruciating pain as well as resuming the bleeding.
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)
-Status-
Impaled in Back | Wet

Taric 'Madman' Cogudib-Luckily, the butcher is [4] not a civ member. No loyalty cascade this time!
Taric takes aim and fires repeatedly through the fortification while the butcher continues his assualt. The rounds [6] strike the butcher's helmet repeatedly, bouncing off of his helmet but knocking him out in the process! -3 rounds
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

Butch 'Butcher' Artiboucheff-Before he is knocked out, Butch manages to jam his hammer into the ground next to Tarran's head.
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)
-Status-
Unconscious | Bleeding

Tarran Terra-Joining Porin, Tarran takes a stab (get it?) at killing the Butcher himself. He [2] stabs the Butcher in the boot, doing little damage, if anything. The butcher suddenly falls over with a loud clank.
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)
-Status-
Wet | Broken leg

Nihilius 'Cogs' Vekt-Seeing as everyone is crowded around the butcher, it's a great timer to fire, eh? Nope. But Cogs does anyway, hitting [1] [7] himself? [6] Tarran in the leg, breaking it. Again.
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

'Zrk'-Zrk gets out his pistol and shoots the Dwarf repeatedly in the side, [4] doing no noticable damage until [5] the last shot, which draws blood.
Silently drawing his pistol, Zrk strolls out the door and steps out from behind the corner. With his gun raised, he approaches the building, noticing Tarran being attacked and the two enemy soldiers halting the caravan guards.
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Current Allies (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Current Enemies (click to show/hide)

Meanwhile... the Spearman stabs the Mauler in the [1] torso, but the hit glances off the iron breastplate as the Mauler retaliates and [1] pushes the Spearman back.
The Maceman bashes the Swordsman in the [6] sword, knocking it out of his grip!
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Have I now become your enemy by telling you the truth? (Gal 4:16)

Tarran

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #213 on: April 17, 2011, 01:33:36 am »
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH YOU BASTARD WHY DID I EVEN CREATE YOUR RACE?! SCREW THIS, YOU ASSHOLES DEAL WITH THIS YOURSELF!"

Crawl away from sight.
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Quote from: Phantom
Unknown to most but the insane and the mystics, Tarran is actually Earth itself, as Earth is sentient like that planet in Avatar. Originally Earth used names such as Terra on the internet, but to protect it's identity it changed letters, now becoming the Tarran you know today.
Quote from: Ze Spy
Tarran has the "Tarran Bug", a bug which causes the affected character to repeatedly hit teammates while dual-wielding instead of whatever the hell he is shooting at.

SeriousConcentrate

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #214 on: April 17, 2011, 02:05:56 am »
With a ruthless, practiced efficiency one wouldn't expect from such a small, cute creature, Porin moved to slit the Butcher's throat and loot the body for neat trinkets. "Tarran OK?" he asked over his shoulder as he went about his business.
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SerCon Shorts: This Is How You Do It - Twenty-three one minute or less videos of random stupidity in AC:U, Bloodborne, DS2:SotFS, Salt & Sanctuary, and The Witcher 3.

Tarran

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #215 on: April 17, 2011, 02:16:08 am »
"NO I AM NOT MY DAMN FOOT'S BEEN SHOT AGAIN!"
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Quote from: Phantom
Unknown to most but the insane and the mystics, Tarran is actually Earth itself, as Earth is sentient like that planet in Avatar. Originally Earth used names such as Terra on the internet, but to protect it's identity it changed letters, now becoming the Tarran you know today.
Quote from: Ze Spy
Tarran has the "Tarran Bug", a bug which causes the affected character to repeatedly hit teammates while dual-wielding instead of whatever the hell he is shooting at.

SeriousConcentrate

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #216 on: April 17, 2011, 02:23:21 am »
Porin looked sad. That didn't stop him from continuing his ironic attempt to slaughter the butcher and loot his body. "If Porin find healing potion Porin give you one," he offered as he went through pockets.
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SerCon Shorts: This Is How You Do It - Twenty-three one minute or less videos of random stupidity in AC:U, Bloodborne, DS2:SotFS, Salt & Sanctuary, and The Witcher 3.

Taricus

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #217 on: April 17, 2011, 04:53:26 am »
Back to beating an enemy with the bayonet time!
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We sided with the holocaust for a fucking +1 roll
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jakeread1

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #218 on: April 17, 2011, 05:18:44 am »
Politly say "Thanks! It seems the bleeding is back though does this place have a doctor?
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Quote from: Meanmelter on February 14, 2011, 06:39:27 pm
New Character awaits a epic black vs hood black vs straight up black fight!
http://www.youtube.com/user/jakeread1 <----- that there is my youtube channel!

Mekboy

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #219 on: April 17, 2011, 07:06:46 am »
"Oh bugger." Reloading his weapon once more, Cogs decides to try and make amends by rushing over to Tarran, once he has reached a safe distance from the fight, and doing what he can for the broken leg.
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Quote from: CatalystParadox
Aw, Mekboy! A song for meeeee?
You're so sweet.  Why don't you just come in here so I can give you a hug.
... bring my pants.
Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
You seem to be under the illusion that we give a shit about what happens to dwarves who are too dumb to live.

HighEndNoob

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #220 on: April 17, 2011, 01:57:32 pm »
Use The Sword imbued with Ice on the Mauler
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Quote
(5) You manage to struggle free of the guards and sprint to a safe distance before tossing a knife at one! (5 + 1 = 6) The throwing knife zips through the air, slitting a guard's throat! It then travels around the group of guards like a boomerang. It (5) Slits another throat, (Three 6's in a row!) decapitates three more (!), (4) slices open the last guard's arm, and (2) narrowly misses a random bystander. It then flies back into your hand. Holy crap.

Zrk2

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #221 on: April 19, 2011, 03:58:46 pm »
Quote from: SeriousConcentrate on April 17, 2011, 02:05:56 am
With a ruthless, practiced efficiency one wouldn't expect from such a small, cute creature, Porin moved to slit the Butcher's throat and loot the body for neat trinkets. "Tarran OK?" he asked over his shoulder as he went about his business.
Quote from: SeriousConcentrate on April 17, 2011, 02:23:21 am
Porin looked sad. That didn't stop him from continuing his ironic attempt to slaughter the butcher and loot his body. "If Porin find healing potion Porin give you one," he offered as he went through pockets.

What're you doing?

Backhand Porin. 'Bugger off, how am I supposed to interrogate him if you kill him, genius?' Wake the butcher up and put my gun between his legs. 'Tell me who sent you or I'll blow your bloody manhood off.'
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Quote from: PTTG?? on May 24, 2012, 12:34:25 pm
He's just keeping up with the Cardassians.

Krath

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #222 on: April 19, 2011, 04:08:59 pm »
You all seem to be assuming you'll kill the butcher  :P
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Quote from: ein on July 29, 2011, 11:29:01 pm
Jizzar sounds some kinda celestial object made of jizz~
Like a quasar or something~

HighEndNoob

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #223 on: April 22, 2011, 05:06:14 pm »
Bump
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Quote
(5) You manage to struggle free of the guards and sprint to a safe distance before tossing a knife at one! (5 + 1 = 6) The throwing knife zips through the air, slitting a guard's throat! It then travels around the group of guards like a boomerang. It (5) Slits another throat, (Three 6's in a row!) decapitates three more (!), (4) slices open the last guard's arm, and (2) narrowly misses a random bystander. It then flies back into your hand. Holy crap.

_DivideByZero_

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Re: Histories of Brilliance and Stupidity
« Reply #224 on: April 22, 2011, 06:34:05 pm »
Roll 14

Objective(s):
Police Duty

Location(s):
RidgeWalled - Castle
Barakar - Town (Hawk, Bjorn, Zrk, Sir Fiddle, Tarran, Taric, Porin, Cogs)

Nathaniel 'Hawk' Hawkins-Unhappy, Hawk rushes down the stairs to meet the butcher head on.
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

Porin Keeperechoes-Noticing Tarran's injury, Porin politely asks,
"Tarran OK?"
"NO I AM NOT MY DAMN FOOT'S BEEN SHOT AGAIN!"
Doesn't sound good.
"If Porin find healing potion Porin give you one,"
Without killing the butcher, Porin (4) pulls a large watch out of the Butcher's pocket before the Butcher gets up and throws everyone away, entering a martial trance and stunning those thrown!
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)
-Status
Stunned

Bjorn Inmus-Rushing past the Butcher to help out the traders, you [3] freeze your sword and bring it down on the mauler. Despite your wizard squishiness (-1), you (6-1=5) decapitate the hammerman and loot his maul.
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

Ivan 'Sir Fiddle' Fiddlebottom-"Thanks! It seems the bleeding is back though. Does this place have a doctor?"
"Nope. Sorry."[/b]
(1)
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)
-Status
Impaled in Back | Wet

Taric 'Madman' Cogudib-After Butcher enters his trance, Taric rushes over to bea him with his bayonet! He (6) hacks The Butcher in the head x43 with his steel bayonet, but the attack is deflected by the steel helm x43!
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)
-Status
Right Leg

Tarran Terra-"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH YOU BASTARD WHY DID I EVEN CREATE YOUR RACE?! SCREW THIS, YOU ASSHOLES DEAL WITH THIS YOURSELF!"
Tarran quickly (3) crawls over to safety and enjoys himself while the Butcher turns his party into a salad.
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)
-Status
Wet | Broken Leg | Stunned

Nihilius 'Cogs' Vekt-"Oh bugger."
Cogs makes his way over to Tarran, deeply apologizes, then (3) uses his toolkit to build a makeshift splint out of a wrench and a screwdriver.
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

'Zrk'-Zrk, coming late to the party, is surprised by the Butcher's sudden revival. Doing what he can, he takes his gun and pushes it into the Butcher's chest, threatening to fire. (1) with a quick and sudden move, the Butcher flicks the gun out of Zrk's hand and brings out his Maul, slamming it into Zrk and knocking him back.
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)
-Status
Trouble Breathing

Butch 'Butcher' Artiboucheff-Now in a berserk rage, the Butcher responds to Taric's futile attempt by almost hacking his leg off through the leather pants, shattering the bone and tearing apart the muscle!
Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)
-Status
Bleeding


Spoiler: Current Allies (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Current Enemies (click to show/hide)

The Swordsman (4) grabs his sword and gets up!
« Last Edit: April 22, 2011, 06:36:45 pm by _DivideByZero_ »
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Have I now become your enemy by telling you the truth? (Gal 4:16)
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