I've written quite a bit, but here is my first newspaper article written for the Rattown Gazette. It kind of teases what will be the plot. I hope those of you familiar with the comic will find this recognizable in its tone.
RATTOWN CITY COUNCIL PASSES NEW PRO-CAT JOB LEGISLATION
Poor, adowable kitties to wecieve extwa hewp
By Beatrice Blue
All-around great-guy Council-cat Amadeus Chomper has done it again and proposed amazing legislation that would further help cats in Rattown. The bill was proposed and unanimously passed at the Rattown City Council meeting last night in the Great Room at Town Hall. The three-hundred twenty-three page bill will basically require businesses to hire kitties who want to work. When it passed, a great cheer went up from those sitting in the thousand-seat hall (and from the standing-room only wings where speakers piped the session).
During the session, when the public was invited to give input to the bill (before it unanimously passed), most rats were very excited to give their input.
“I love it! Poor kitties can work if they want now!” said one excited rat.
Another said, “This day is very great. Kitties are being helped!”
“Kitties are so cute,” said a small rat who stood up out of turn, but applause rang out and the rats on the council nodded wisely.
The only dissenting voice was from the old and crotchety mouse Ignatius Happypaws (who is never happy). “We need to stop this tomfoolery!” He exclaimed in his crotchety voice. “Cats can already work if they want to. My cleaning company can’t support employees who take five naps a shift and who will ignore what we tell them. Not to mention the jobs that the cats will be stealing from hard-working blue-collar mice everywhere! This is going to be like every other cat-helping bill that Rattown passes. It hurts the hard-working rodents and the upper-class wealthy rats don’t notice a thing!”
The council turned their heads in unison to look at Council-cat Chomper, but the mayor spoke up. “I for one completely support this bill, and…”
“I think cats will surprise us,” said Council-cat Chomper mysteriously, with a strange gleam on his adorable, mask-like face.
“Yes,” said the mayor, “They certainly surprise me on a daily basis. Why, just yesterday, I saw a kitty who had wandered into the City Hall courtyard chasing a butterfly! It was adorable!”
The entire hall broke into laughter.
“I was so overtaken by how cute he was I asked him what he was doing. He said, ‘I’m gonna get me some butter!’”
The laughter escalated, and many council-rats nodded and said, “Yes, that is so cat.”
Ignatius Happypaws was not happy. “Let me again reiterate that this is ridiculous. There hasn’t EVER been a mouse on the city council – despite many attempts by myself and others – and yet the moment a stray asks to be put on the council, the council bends over backwards to get him on!”
“Well, look at him,” argued the mayor, “He’s just so cute! Look at the way he puts his paws over his face in embarrassment!”
Council-cat Chomper was very cute with his paws over his face.
“Plus,” continued the mayor, his voice turning syrupy-sweet, “Just wook at his stubby widdle tail, the pwide and joy of every cat. The poor thing!”
“Awww,” said everyone. Council-cat Chomper’s ears went red (which only went to further accentuate his adorable cat-ness).
Overall, it was a very productive meeting, and many, many rats and cats (and other rodents as well) were happy last night. The law should go into effect over the next month. Business owners should look for notices in the mail of how it will affect them.
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Topic: Rainseeker's Web Comic Project!!! (Read 60786 times)