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[Maklak]

[...]
Maybe he'd give a long-winded overly dramatic speech...

Urist McEmo: And now, you assholes, because you didn't bring me a purple gem when I asked for one, I'm going to lay down in this coffin and stay in there until I DIE. That's right. I hope you all feel really fucking ba-
Urist McCarpenter: *throws plump helmets at Urist McEmo* Get on with it! I have some bins to make, you stupid turd!
Urist McEmo: ;_;

You obviously don't understand depression at all. In case of Dwarfs it is suffering so great, that they are willing to die to end it. They don't talk to other dwarfs after they get melancholy, they are too focused on dying. Walking into an instant deathtrap or jumping into magma makes much more sense in that state of mind than your silly suggestion (which seems more like throwing a tantrum, but still a long shot from there).