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Author Topic: Caged Dwarf  (Read 563 times)

Girlinhat

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Caged Dwarf
« on: February 13, 2011, 09:10:25 pm »

As you may or may not remember, I've recently acquired a male and female giant cave spider.  I managed to get them both locked away on chains in a pseudo temple, and then placed more chains just outside where I kept a pair of dogs, with the intent that the dogs would cause the spider to spew at them and harvesting could begin while I awaited breeding (modded to give birth, here).

I forgot about them, as they refused to give me any silk.

After a time though, they gave birth, and the hatchlings promptly loitered around their mother while avoiding my cage traps just outside.  The hope that the dogs would also lure the young out seemed to have failed.  Then, however, I got the message, "The Stray Dog has been struck down!" and lo and behold, the children scurried out and into the traps, but not before landing bites on the dogs and killing them via poison.  No worries there, plenty more dogs.

However, in the process, silk was produced.  I quickly ordered my cloth-lord to harvest it, and unlocked the main door to the temple.  Immediately, a half dozen peasants rush out with cages to refill the traps, and along the way trash all but like 3 pieces of silk, and one manages to get himself caught in a cage.  I've now built the cage, and he's alive... for now.  He's a legendary mason and engraver, and I've used him to make slabs before, but not much else.  I'd rather not kill him, but he needs to be punished for his ruining of bountiful silk!  Ideas?

Also, I think I'm gonna put cage traps everywhere, as well as tame spider cages and wild spider cages, then release them all at once.  I should have a few dozen spider corpses for harvesting, some re-caged spiders, silk, and shortly afterwards, caged dwarves!

bobhayes

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Re: Caged Dwarf
« Reply #1 on: February 13, 2011, 09:25:28 pm »

However, in the process, silk was produced.  I quickly ordered my cloth-lord to harvest it, and unlocked the main door to the temple.  Immediately, a half dozen peasants rush out with cages to refill the traps, and along the way trash all but like 3 pieces of silk, and one manages to get himself caught in a cage.  I've now built the cage, and he's alive... for now.  He's a legendary mason and engraver, and I've used him to make slabs before, but not much else.  I'd rather not kill him, but he needs to be punished for his ruining of bountiful silk!  Ideas?

Look through all your female dwarves and find the least attractive one (by dorf standards). Burrow the two of them together in a dining room until they fall in love and get married. That'll be punishment enough.
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Nekudotayim

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Re: Caged Dwarf
« Reply #2 on: February 13, 2011, 09:27:07 pm »

I'd rather not kill him, but he needs to be punished for his ruining of bountiful silk!  Ideas?

Not kill him? Hm... create a burrow below an atom smasher and assign his children to this burrow. Smash them. You said not to kill HIM.

If he has no children, his wife will do the job as well.

Edit:

Ooooh and put his cage in front of the atom smasher, so he has to watch it!
« Last Edit: February 13, 2011, 09:29:12 pm by Nekudotayim »
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Once upon a time there was a dwarf. Then he died. The End.

Duhwolf

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Re: Caged Dwarf
« Reply #3 on: February 13, 2011, 09:47:10 pm »

Same general idea as Nekudotayim had but why not do it one at a time. Let him throw a tantrum in the cage and then put another family member in there. Or better yet feed them to the spiders.
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Girlinhat

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Re: Caged Dwarf
« Reply #4 on: February 13, 2011, 09:50:52 pm »

He has now died of thirst.  It appears that no one will water him unless he's a prisoner.  I've LEARNED something!

Aramco

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Re: Caged Dwarf
« Reply #5 on: February 13, 2011, 10:16:05 pm »

He has now died of thirst.  It appears that no one will water him unless he's a prisoner.  I've LEARNED something!

Yes, something which can be put to use in my current fortress, hmmm...
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Or maybe there's a god who's just completely insane and sends you to Detroit, Michigan in a new body if you ever utter the name "Pat Sajak".

Uristocrat

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Re: Caged Dwarf
« Reply #6 on: February 13, 2011, 10:42:08 pm »

He has now died of thirst.  It appears that no one will water him unless he's a prisoner.  I've LEARNED something!

Should have tried to dump his cage onto the trade depot from a garbage zone above, then attempted to trade it to the elves.

I have no idea if that will work, but....
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You could have berries on the rocks and the dwarves would say it was "berry gneiss."
You should die horribly for this. And I mean that in the nicest possible way.

Savolainen5

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Re: Caged Dwarf
« Reply #7 on: February 14, 2011, 12:56:58 am »

I dunno, I think it'd be ironic and awesome to sacrifice him to the GCSs.
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A small creature sometimes found on paper.  It is small.  Its eyes are black. It is adored by children for its cuteness.
(On a picture of cavies):
We see a family of small land rodents.
Dwarfs see masterpiece roasts.