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[sonerohi]

Thread title is a huge clue in.

Basically, I suffer from panic attacks a lot, when socializing. The times I don't have attacks are small groups of friends, one on one conversations, meeting new people in the presence of friends, and a few others. Basically, it seems to me like ratios. I have always been heavily introverted, but I got along despite that. Now though, it seems like if I can't isolate and sort of remove myself, then I just break down.

Recently, I was at a lock in at school, and was having a great time. I was in a group of fifteen, out of a crowd of 400 or so. I had met everyone in my group and was getting along with them and opening up just as much as I do when chatting with my best friends. I felt really great about the situation and was laughing and dancing, and just all of a sudden got hit. I felt nauseous, heart rate shot up, got tunnel vision, felt faint, my extremities hurt, and I just felt cold inside and miserable all of a sudden. I am thinking (speculating with all my inner Internet doctor) that my heart condition, an unusually bad coronary artery fistula, may be compounding the situation.

Dear B12, my questions, based on this ( and a previous lock in that went exactly the same way), are several in number and are as follows. How do I fight the attacks once they happen? How do I distinguish the effects, like faintness and such, from what is being caused by the panic attack and what is my heart acting up in response to the attack? How do I socially maneuver into smaller groups to help prevent these instances?

To answer my own questions, so you guys know what I do and do not know, I'm editing here.
When an attack happens, I usually just sit down, breathe slowly, and try to make small talk with friends to help calm me down, and also get lots of cold water.
I have no clue how to distinguish the two, since a lot of what they cause in a person are the same, although the high heart rate from a panic attack will induce a heart flare-up thing (since attack is taken). They sort of feed into each other, because while I know the panic attack is mental and not real danger to me, the heart issue is, and since I can't tell what is what I get afraid, which heightens the panic attack, and the increased blood flow from that heightens my heart flare up.
The best I have for the social tactics to prevent this are to keep going to these lock ins. I have had panic attacks at the last five and intend to go to the next one still, to keep fighting it til it doesn't happen.

Advanced apologies if formating or reading flow are terrible, if you think my OP is terrible please tell me.

[Darvi]

Dear B12, my questions, based on this ( and a previous lock in that went exactly the same way), are several in number and are as follows. How do I fight the attacks once they happen? How do I distinguish the effects, like faintness and such, from what is being caused by the panic attack and what is my heart acting up in response to the attack?

When in doubt, consult a doctor.

How do I socially maneuver into smaller groups to help prevent these instances?

When the group becomes too big, jus' tell them that you'd like to leave. Or try to pretend that you're not actually in the group. That's what I do when there's too many people around. Go for a short walk. You know, spend some time being introvertive (is that actually a word?).

[ChairmanPoo]

You should go to a professional and get it treated. IIRC social phobia is treated with a combination of ansiolithics, antidepressants, and controled exposition and group training.

[smigenboger]

How do you fare doing extended activities when not around people? Dancing and being generally exertive could make your coping ability go down. The people I know with anxiety say they can cope much better earlier in the day and when fully rested and alert.

[The Merchant Of Menace]

Hmm...
My personal way of dealing with panic attacks is to get away from people and isolate myself as much as possible.

If you have some form of mantra it may help as well, just thinking "everythin is fine" or something to that extent.
Aside from that, I, personally, can't do much else to deal with them.

[Bouchart]

Just avoid large groups of people whenever possible.

[Heron TSG]

You must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
You will face your fear.
You will permit it to pass through you and over you.
And when it has gone past you shall turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only you will remain.

[Grakelin]

Fear cuts deeper than swords

see with your eyes, hear with your ears

[Tellemurius]

my father has rare panic attacks but they are fucking weird (he roams around the house at night periodically walks into our rooms and peer out the windows). ask your doctor for anxiety pills for emergencies.

[scriver]

My personal way of dealing with panic attacks is to get away from people and isolate myself as much as possible.

Just avoid large groups of people whenever possible.

These are both terrible, terrible advice. The only thing doing this will accomplish is reinforcing the condition, and will also put you in the risk-zone of developing social phobia and the like. Obviously, avoiding a problem does not deal with it.

If you don't want, can or think it's necessary  see a counsellor or therapist or something like that, I can only advice you to keep doing what you seem to be doing now; Keep pushing yourself into the kind of situations that triggers the attacks. Going to these "lock ins" (what is that, by the way?) seem like good idea, especially since you appear to have fun at them the rest of the time. You're body should get the hint eventually. If you've got the determination to do so, maybe make up some sort of plan so you can't make up excuses or procrastinate as easily. And while it doesn't appear so from your OP, I'll still add that if you feel ashamed, nervous or vulnerable about your panic attacks and having them in front of friends/how people will react to them, then telling your friends about how you want to fight them might ease those feelings somewhat. Having people understand what you're going through is always helpful.

Other than that, some "lighter" form of therapy or counselling could be helpful, if only because they most likely have experience with these kind of things and can give you advice and tools to help yourself, that you cant get from other people (as reliable, at least).

[The Merchant Of Menace]

Yah, I'm already terrified of people, ergo, panic attacks whenever I'm near them, and I did state that it was my personal way of dealing.

[Vector]

Going to these "lock ins" (what is that, by the way?) seem like good idea, especially since you appear to have fun at them the rest of the time.

I nearly drowned when I was 3.  My mother made me put my face into bowls of water in the kitchen, hand on the back of my neck, over and over again.  I took swim lessons for years, until I started crying every time they tried to get me to dive into a pool.  I failed the swim test in high school, despite being perfectly able to swim, due to panic attacks--automatic ones, endured with no sense of fear, even as I was forcing myself to keep moving.

When I went to college, I could still hardly wash my face with a wet washcloth.  I just started gasping.

If you're having panic attacks, forcing yourself into the most difficult situations will often just give you more panic attacks.

In the case of fixing my fear of swimming, I started with just standing in the shower, before getting my face closer and closer to the water, running water over the back of my head and into my face, and finally keeping myself calm as I ran water more and more directly onto my face itself, just standing there feeling it without trying to wash or do anything but control my breathing.  Nowadays, I can get a little water up my nose and all over my mouth without much trouble.  My brain will quietly tell me "Vector, you are drowning," to which I can tell it "No, I am not drowning" and everything moves on this way.  I was even able to swim last summer without any fear at all, because I took a year to slowly make progress.  All of the quick exposures the world had ever offered me just made me more and more frightened, as I started sinking below the surface, again and again, with my desperate efforts to stay afloat.


I'm sure you can understand what the metaphor is, here.  Take little steps.  Don't just force your way through it with the idea that it is "Hurr manly" or something like that.  I'm not saying that you should spend all your time isolated--I've done that, and it was bad.  But work up to it.  Find your limits, acclimate yourself to those limits, and move on while being kind to yourself.  If you need a psychologist to help you with that, then go for it.  But for goodness' sakes, don't just keep pushing yourself up against the wall unless you've already tried some other things.  You've "failed" 5 times.  Isn't that enough to show you that you should see how a different tactic works out?

[scriver]

Vector, the way I see it, going to these lock ins might be more similar to your shower therapy than having your mother pressing your face into a bowl of water (What the hell gave her the idea that would be helping anyway? It's just outright cruel). He said he had no trouble spending time with small groups of people and friends, so trying to expand the "safe" zone to slightly bigger social happenings would be the next logical step. As long as he have friends around him, and have fun (except for or despite the attacks), of course. If these "exercises" increases anxiety rather than the opposite, of course he should step down a notch and try something less taxing. All I wrote in the above post was under the assumption that he was in fact ready to face these kind of situations. Maybe I should have been a bit more clear on that.

[Darvi]

Vector, the way I see it, going to these lock ins might be more similar to your shower therapy than having your mother pressing your face into a bowl of water (What the hell gave her the idea that would be helping anyway? It's just outright cruel). He said he had no trouble spending time with small groups of people and friends, so trying to expand the "safe" zone to slightly bigger social happenings would be the next logical step. As long as he have friends around him, and have fun (except for or despite the attacks), of course. If these "exercises" increases anxiety rather than the opposite, of course he should step down a notch and try something less taxing. All I wrote in the above post was under the assumption that he was in fact ready to face these kind of situations. Maybe I should have been a bit more clear on that.

Exactly. Baby steps. And, as I said, step out if you get too uncomfortable.

[sonerohi]

Thank you for the tips everyone. You guys have no idea how comforting it is to get the reinforcement provided here.

@Vector: I am already going to a therapist, and was considering bringing this up at my next appointment, but will definitely do so now. I didn't really realize panic attacks could be reinforced into behavior, but now I do and am taking steps. I'm not going to go all 'herp derp testosterone mangrit' on the issue, but I will keep at it, and a change in tactics probably is necessary.

@Tellemarius & Chairman: I'll be talking to my therapist about the necessity of medications, but are there any you would recommend me asking about?

@Scriver & Darvi: Thank you two for kind of encouraging me to keep at it. As I've said, my approach might change up but this will be solved.

@Scriver: A lock in at my school is a sort of hodge podge of stuff. Kids from every high school in the district can sign up and attend, and we all come in on a Friday evening and then they lock the building. We do a lot of peer counseling sort of stuff, along with drug awareness and prevention, but we do it in a goofy and fun way. It is an amazing bonding experience, and gets pretty emotional.