Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[DuckBoy2]

Oooh, I got another long one.  This time I'll just post the highlights, since this one goes on forever

In:  When I play Dwarf Fortress, I like to create a conveyor belt of socks, after I light them on fire using magma

Best Outs: 

Dwarf fortress my socks are on fire when you play after you use the magma, creating a conveyor belt that I

After you use the magma, creating a conveyor belt, socks when playing dwarf fortress that is burning me

When you are burning to play my dwarf fortress, the sock to create a conveyor belt, after using the magma

When you burn playing dwarf fortress, my socks after using the magma, creating a conveyor belt

...and bake when you play a dwarf in my socks

My personal favorite, follows the classic "If you... You might be a redneck" style
When you play with fire in my socks using a conveyor belt to build your fortress of magma, you dwarf

[Nyxalinth]

Mine has HFS references, so...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Digging too deeply into the earth will unleash the demon minions of hell upon your dwarves

becomes this

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Demonstrate to the minions of Satan also dug deep dwarf planet

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Dwarf planet dug deep and demonstrated the hand of the devil

Here's another

this is an amethyst bucket.  all craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It menaces with spikes of dogs bone and is encrusted with flint.  On the item is an image of plump helmets in amethyst.

It gave me

This is the amethyst bucket. Craftsdwarfship All are top quality. It is studded with flint threat spike dog bone. Plump helmet is an image of Amethyst items.

[iEpinephrine]

Input:
The forgotten beast Ozsit Genlathgakit has come! A great skinless dimetrodon. It has a pair of fan-like antennae and it squirms and fidgets. Beware its deadly spittle.

Output:
The Forgotten Beast Ozsit Genlathgakit came! Great skin dimetrodon. Wiggle is fidgeting like a pair of male antenna. Please note that deadly spit.

Reading it, it seems very suggestive for no reason.

Hahahaha, oh dear...

[EvilFuzzy9]

In: The goblins are in our fort, killing our dwarves.
Out: Dowafugoburin are killing us in our fort.

Bah, standard engrish, nothing impressive.

In: Blood for the blood god! Skulls for the skull throne!
Out: Blood Blood God! Skull Skull Throne!

I chuckle at this one because "blood blood" in Japanese can be read as "chi chi", which is homophonous with the Japanese word for breast-milk. So immature...

In: Dwarves don't have sex. They reproduce via spores.
Out: Dwarves need to have sex. They are spores to reproduce.

That explains so much about Japan.

In: Losing is fun.
Out: Please enjoy losing.

... There is nothing I can add to that.

[IpunchFaces]

In:
"Dwarves are creatures fond of drink and industry"

Out:
"Dwarves like to drink life and industry."

I think I like this thing.

---

Also, In:
"There is an elephant in the cage trap!"

Out:
"The cage trap is an elephant!"

OH, SH-

[Dutchling]

In: I am a dwarf and I really hate goblins
Out: My children and I really need to use the Goblin

:S

In: Magma is the solution for all your elf related problems
Out: Magma is a solution for all problems related to Elf

That's true but pretty much the same thing

In: A raccoon always has a tail, but a tail does not always have a racoon
Halfway out: Raccoon at the end, all the time except for the raccoon tail       <--
Out: Finally, all the time Tanukitanukiteru

In: This an artifact, it is pretty useless, and because it was produced by a possesses mood the Dwarf that created it is not gonna live for a very long time
Out: If you are not intended to create a child you do not live long, it is very beautiful, I felt that this project has been generated

Well, it does like children

EDIT: the raccoon thing ended up weird because I misspelled on of the two raccoons :S

[Darvi]

In:
I am a dwarf and I really hate goblins

Out:
My children and I really need to use the Goblin

:S

PLease tell me "goblin" is an euphemism for loo.

[Dutchling]

In:
I am a dwarf and I really hate goblins

Out:
My children and I really need to use the Goblin

:S

PLease tell me "goblin" is an euphemism for loo.

This is a goblin skull loo. all craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is encrusted with troll teeth.

[Dutchling]

I'm not trying to spam the thread but this one is just pure awesomesauce:

In: Oh my God! They killed Kenny

Out: For them, the Holy mackerel killed Kenny

whut?

[Lovechild]

In: Welcome to fucking Boatmurdered!

Out: Welcome, kill the fucking boat!
_____

In: Don't travel alone at night, or the bogeyman will get you.

Out: Or you can go to my boogeyman will guide you through the night just for you.

[Kc_spot]

This is a goblin skull loo. all craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is encrusted with troll teeth.

Sigged like a boss.

[Seanp888]

In "Rats i'm toast, Curse you magma !"
Midway"I'm a rat, I curse the toast of magma?"
Out "Magma, or curse my toast and rats?"

in"Oh no Urist chopped off one of his friend's arms !"
out"Oh no, Urist is one of the arms of his friend!"

In"Oh no my doctor needs a doctor for he is wounded"

Some of the midways
"Ah he is wounded, my doctor is no need"
"Alas, he is a doctor, not mandatory, but I was injured."
"Unfortunately, the doctor may need to hurt me."(Oh dear...)

Out"Unfortunately, the doctor must be to hurt me"

Heh it made the least sense at the end
and all the things in the middle end up being quite true

Oh and also my sig a suppose

 In:  I don't imagine them marching out there in a column and facing the enemy in a phalanx and using traditional footwork and precise blows to disable their target.  I figure they chug six beers, strap up and roll out with the intention of making something vomit.

Out:My goal is an accurate shot is facing an enemy that is used to imagine a sequence of bone can be clearly traditional march footwork. I will chug a beer on her knees and vomiting, some of them, please please try to be connected to a six-year expansion project.

[Jacob/Lee]

In:
Because its stupid, pointless and overly complicated. It's perfect for dwarves!

Out:
It is to avoid the complexity of silly nonsense. This is perfect for dwarf.
HERETIC!

[GreatWyrmGold]

First, funny ones in the middle, last

---

My frames per second rate is horrible because of all my cats.

My frames per second, all cats are terrible.

I have a bad frame per second all the cats.

---

Oh no! My woodcutter is being interrupted by zombie whales!

Oh no! The logger, but I'm not being interrupted by Zonbikujira!

---

WHY did I embark on a terrifying ocean? WHY?

I embark on a sea of poor people why? Why?

I embark on the sea for the poor? Why?

---

Oh, yeah, the magma pipe and serene forest and lack of elves and stuff.

Oh, and the lack of quiet woods and raw materials Elf magma pipe.

Oh, Erufumagumapaipu lack of raw materials forests and quiet.

Oh, and the lack of raw materials forests Erufumagumapaipu quiet.

---

Next time, I'll embark on a volcano right next to a forest retreat, clear-cut the forest, and unleash the power of MAGMA on those Armok-hated hippies! Yeah!

Next time, I Armok they were next to the magma of the volcano lair in the forest, a clear right to embark on a forest really hate hippies! Yes!

Next time, I was the forests they had a nest next to the magma of the volcano show that the right to embark on a forest really hippie Armok! Yes!

Volcanic magma Armok forest, forest has been started for real the next time, I was just beside the nest of hippies! Yes!

Volcanic magma Armok forest, forest, has been started for real next time, I was just beside the nest of hippies! Yes!

---

Toady One plays Russian Roulette with forgotten beasts. Will your fortress be attacked by a harmless quadruped made of snow that breathes fire or a giant steel spider that flies and spews necrotic blood everywhere?

One is playing toady to forget Russian roulette with the beast. Fortress, you will be attacked by blowing snow made the four-legged giant steel spider spit fire and blood flies and necrosis where innocent?

One has to toady played Russian roulette with the forgotten animals. Fortress is making giant steel spider spit fire 4 foot caught in a snowstorm you fly the blood of innocent deaths here?

One has to toady played Russian roulette with the forgotten animals. Fort involved in creating a storm of fire 4 feet flying giant steel spider spit blood of innocent deaths here?

One has to toady played Russian roulette with the forgotten animals. Spit blood involved in creating a fire storm of four feet of the fort where the death of a giant steel spider innocent?

One has to toady played Russian roulette with the forgotten animals. In this case, involved in creating a fire storm of the four legs of the innocent death of Fort giant steel spider vomit blood?

One has to toady played Russian roulette with the forgotten animals. In this case, creating a storm of fire involving four legs of the death of innocent blood in vomit Fort giant steel spider?

One has to toady played Russian roulette with the forgotten animals. In this case, creating a fire storm of four legs of the death of innocent blood in vomit Fort giant steel spider?

---
That's enough non-DF insanity for now.

[SirAaronIII]

"Dwarves are cool with humans, but they hate elves" --> "Humans and dwarves are cool, they are using the elf"
Sorta true, if by "using" you mean "brutally slaughtering".