Well once suggestions die down, I'm going to take suggestions for squad structure and command hierarchy. Using a complex series of algorithms (see: coin flips and 40K dice), we'll see who wins. Each combatant will get an ability that modifies the battle according to what their most prominent trait or biggest accomplishment is.
Each squad will have a commander, and the battlefield will be determined by them. Coin flip decides if it's the Dorf or Elf home turf. The sides will set up in strategic formations on opposite sides of the map (note that it will be drawn by me), and the fighting will commence. The 40K hit dice will determine movement, and coin will determine who attacks and hits. It will be turn based (Dorf1-Elf1-Dorf2-Etc). I've done this before with video game characters (me and a buddy listed 150-some and chose our units by choosing a random number that would correspond to the units). It can be very interesting, and with a little imagination and storytelling skill (which any DF player should possess), it can become near epic. Once fighting ensues, I'll also provide turn-by-turn screenshots along with the blow-by-blow account.
Bet you didn't think it was going to be that complex!