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[Vorthon]

This is a game in a similar vein as Man of SCIENCE! and YOU ARE WIZARD!, only in space.

Intro:

Well, you don't remember much... You do remember that this thing you're sitting in is your ship, you've just come out of stasis, the star you're hurtling towards is Tau Ceti, and that you should probably make a course adjustment soon if you don't want to die.

In front of your seat is an instrument panel. It has many buttons. Some of which likely control your ship's thrusters.

What was your name again? You forget.

[Dwarmin]

How could I forget a name like Bub Blastingcap?

[Demonic Spoon]

Randomly mash buttons on the instrument panel.

[Vorthon]

How could I forget a name like Bub Blastingcap?

Of course! How silly of you to forget a name as awesome as Bub Blastingcap!

Randomly mash buttons on the instrument panel.

You find the ship begins to rapidly accelerate, and your ships veers towards a pale blue dot

A computerized voice says, "WARNING: YOU ARE NOW ON A COLLISION COURSE WITH TAU CETI II. WOULD YOU LIKE TO NAME THIS PLANET?"

[Ahra]

negative ACTIVATE BRAKES

[Argembarger]

WE SHALL NAME THE PLANET OH SHIT ACTIVATE BRAKES.

Frantically mash more buttons. Really get into the spirit of the thing. This isn't a time for half-assed mashing.

[Deus ex Machina]

WE SHALL NAME THE PLANET OH SHIT ACTIVATE BRAKES.

[Argembarger]

WE SHALL NAME THE PLANET OH SHIT ACTIVATE BRAKES.

Also, this.

[Vorthon]

Scream OH SHIT at the computerized voice

Frantically mash more buttons. Really get into the spirit of the thing. This isn't a time for half-assed mashing.

The computer merely responds with "OH MY, SOMEONE HAS A FOUL MOUTH."

Success! Your insane, frantic, somewhat comical button-smashing puts you on a course for the planet that will put you into a (semi)stable orbit.

WE SHALL NAME THE PLANET OH SHIT ACTIVATE BRAKES.

"ACCEPTED. TAU CETI II ==> OH SHIT ACTIVATE BRAKES. RUNNING SCANS ON OH SHIT ACTIVATE BRAKES...
25% COMPLETED...
50% COMPLETED...
75% COMPLETED...
100% COMPLETED...
NOW DISPLAYING RESULTS"

Your view of OH SHIT ACTIVATE BRAKES is interrupted by a data chart showing geological, atmospheric, and various other data about OH SHIT ACTIVATE BRAKES.
>DISPLAYING DATA ON OH SHIT ACTIVATE BRAKES_
>EQUATORIAL_RADIUS = 5047.4 KM
>AVERAGE_DENSITY = 5.43 GRAMS/CM^3
>SURFACE_GRAVITY = 0.78G
>SEMIMAJOR_AXIS = 0.641 AU
>AVERAGE_SURFACE_TEMPERATURE = 7.1 DEGREES CELSIUS
>ATMOSPHERIC_PRESSURE_AT_SEA_LEVEL = 295 MILLIBARS (0.291 EARTH ATMOSPHERES)
>ATMOSPHERIC_COMPOSITION: NITROGEN 55.7%; OXYGEN 43.6%; ARGON 0.6%
>AXIAL_TILT = 27 DEGREES
>PLANETARY_ALBEDO = 0.2
>ROTATION_PERIOD = 43.89 HOURS
>ORBITAL_PERIOD = 0.5663244353182751540041067761807 STANDARD YEARS
>HYDROSPHERE_COVERAGE = 67.6%
>AVERAGE_CLOUD_COVER = 27.0%
>ICE_CAP_COVERAGE = 5.6%
>NOTES:
>>TRACES OF INDUSTRIAL POLLUTANTS FOUND {CO, ETC.}
>>UNUSUAL CONCENTRATION OF BIO-MASS DETECTED NEAR COASTLINES
>>CONCLUSIONS:
>>>PLANET MAY HOST LOW-TIER INDUSTRIAL CIVILIZATION. {75% LIKELYHOOD}

[Armok]

> Sell weapons and trinkets, buy half a continent or so.

... low tier industrial civs have online auctions, right?

[Vorthon]

... low tier industrial civs have online auctions, right?

'Fraid not. Low-tier industrial civs are roughly comaparable to mid-18th century england.

[Armok]

yea, but the main character probably ain't that familiar with them. I should have used a :p .

[Vorthon]

> Sell weapons and trinkets, buy half a continent or so.

Whoops... you enter OH SHIT ACTIVATE BRAKES atmosphere at the wrong angle. You are now plummeting uncontrollably towards what appears to be a large city.

[adwarf]

No convince them that we are a god and have super high tech magic stuff bow doen to us or die

[Twi]

Actually activate your brakes, parachutes, retrorockets, or whatever we have to avoid crashing and burning. Or, more likely, exploding.