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[Mindmaker]

People are a lot more complex than that.
Their isn't some magic formula, on how to win someone over.

[Nikov]

My wife obsessed over me for years before I first noticed her. What does that mean, Vector?

... I mean, do you seriously think that your wife was swept off her feet by your superior ignoring-skills?  If she was, then I need to take lessons from you.  I'm not the best at just letting things go.

I ignored her so well we ran two years of cross country on the same team with her constantly right behind me without noticing her.

_{No I don't think I swept her off her feet with ignoring skills.}

Anyway, the best way to address any relationship problem is to talk to the person you're in a relationship with. I wish I could offer advice on getting a girl, but I kind of know less about that than you guys do. I just know how to keep one.

[sonerohi]

Nikov, perhaps she intentionally stayed behind you? I don't know your wife but maybe she liked the view.

And yes, there is a magical victory formula in the form of talking. I've had a lot of ruined relationships from when I tried to be the suave dude and be a pickup artist and crap. I've had other, better relationships, where I was strange and awkward because I put myself out there and was honest, even when talking was embarrassing and awkward.

[Toady One]

I just deleted some derail and nasty business (Grakelin muted for 3 days).  Please try to be helpful and on-topic.

edit: didn't apply the mute until around 8:10am forum time

[Bouchart]

Here's my advice about women and dating:

Any woman worth dating wants a man that, to some degree, shows maturity, loyalty, faithfulness, trustworthiness and stability.

Beyond that, the entire dating process is entirely random and unpredictable, so as long as you have a good head on your shoulders, you shouldn't worry about anything because you have zero control anyway.  Go for it.

[Mazonas]

Dude, sorry you got a no from the girl you're interested in.

But!

Can I just say props to you for going for it and letting her know how you felt in the first place?  Too few guys and girls do this.  Just keep being awesome, be honest about your feelings and you'll find someone awesome soon

[inteuniso]

I used to get depressed when the girl I liked rejected me/went for another guy/etc.

Then I realized I was going at it all wrong. Since I've listened to my shower philosophy (I came up with it in the SHOWER, as with all of my good ideas) I just look at multiple girls. One doesn't like me; so what? There's three others I'm interested in.

I'm not so depressed because of girls anymore.

[Heron TSG]

Well, if it's really your first one, then I'd say... really don't worry about it.  You're young.  You've got lots of time to enjoy ahead of you =)

For some reason I find this to be a really pessimistic attitude, but I guess it might work differently for different people.

Good job at least trying, Thundawich. I hope you do better in the future.

[Artifakt]

I have been there. The best thing I can suggest is build a friendly relationship with her. I talk to my crush a lot (she currently has a boyfriend) but it still is somewhat cathartic.

[eerr]

There is a girl in my life that i have feelings for. I have had these feelings for a little while.

I recently approached her about my feelings, but was bitterly dissapointed when she said she had feelings for another guy.
Since then iv been feeling kind of empty inside and lonely, even though we still talk a fair bit.

I'm just asking if anyone has any advice to help me get through..... ive never been in a situation like this before so i dont know what to do.

Thanks......

Feelings can change, it's fairly common.
...
No guarrentees, but don't give up immediately just because she has feelings for some guy.

[Tack]

(comments related to deleted portions removed)

To bring us back on track- Dude, if a girl doesn't like you, then that's all you can do.

But, if you at least get to know her, then you might get a chance later. Later being, when she gets to know you better, and finds out she knows you better than her secret crush.
But don't rush it. That's just going to cause problems.

[Zrk2]

I would say befriend, and then re-evaluate whether you wish to continue, if you do, then go for it!

[Toady One]

(trolling removed, vipre01 banned)

[Vector]

(trolling removed, vipre01 banned)

Thank you.

Well, if it's really your first one, then I'd say... really don't worry about it.  You're young.  You've got lots of time to enjoy ahead of you =)

For some reason I find this to be a really pessimistic attitude, but I guess it might work differently for different people.

Hmm... to me, it actually feels optimistic.  "Well, if it doesn't work then you have plenty of time, and if it does work, then you're ahead of the game "

In any case, I think that Thundawich is off to a good start.

[Heron TSG]

Well, if it's really your first one, then I'd say... really don't worry about it.  You're young.  You've got lots of time to enjoy ahead of you =)

For some reason I find this to be a really pessimistic attitude, but I guess it might work differently for different people.

Hmm... to me, it actually feels optimistic.  "Well, if it doesn't work then you have plenty of time, and if it does work, then you're ahead of the game "

In any case, I think that Thundawich is off to a good start.

I first thought that you were implying this. "Your first one was bound to fail anyway, just keep trying." I can see how it's optimistic in the future, but the message is none too happy in the present.
[/derail]