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[monk12]

Urist, would you kindly wring that kitten's neck?

Meta: Go explore somewhere nobody else has been before.

Fantasy: Check on the demon, make sure he's not being evil. Then continue sailing.

That's just vague enough to work!

FAKEEDIT: Wow, we posted fast.

[Dermonster]

It's an RTD run by Gatleos.

We're physically addicted. If I don't get another turn by 6 AM tomorrow that road under the bridge will be much redder.

Because of all the paint balloons I will throw in my rage.

[RedWarrior0]

This is on track to catch Multiworld Madness by the end of the next month or so.

[Dermonster]

Also: Why havent all of you gona and voted for this in the Hall of Legends!? Go people GO~!

[Gatleos]

This is on track to catch Multiworld Madness by the end of the next month or so.

Not really, but it will soon overtake Roll To Strike The Earth. Muhahahahaha!

[Frelock]

Meta: Investigate blue pedestal.  Use uncanny prediction to determine whether this holds a keycard, and how to retrieve it.

Fantasy: Use the rigging like monkey bars to get back down to the deck.

[monk12]

This is on track to catch Multiworld Madness by the end of the next month or so.

Not really, but it will soon overtake Roll To Strike The Earth. Muhahahahaha!

Noooooooooo! ...wait, my updates are retarded more by my own time deficits than anything else. Actually I should go do some prep work for tomorrows update...

And look at that, all replies in under an hour and a half.

[Gatleos]

This is on track to catch Multiworld Madness by the end of the next month or so.

Not really, but it will soon overtake Roll To Strike The Earth. Muhahahahaha!

Noooooooooo! ...wait, my updates are retarded more by my own time deficits than anything else. Actually I should go do some prep work for tomorrows update...

And look at that, all replies in under an hour and a half.

Well it does run in real-time weeks, while this one updates around every 1-1.5 days.

[Dermonster]

or in some cases .5 days (Hefts a paint balloon with a meaningful look and a glance at your open car window.)

[Gatleos]

or in some cases .5 days (Hefts a paint balloon with a meaningful look and a glance at your open car window.)

I don't own a car nor do I browse internet forums while driving one down the highway in Minnesota.

[Dermonster]

THEN I WILL BUY YOU A CAR JUST SO I CAN SOIL IT WITH MY RED HOT PAINT RAGE

[Alzeranox]

I lol'd and I can definitely see hilarity ensuing in the next turn or two with Urist and Nist/randomly summoned cat.

[Gatleos]

You will have such fun. The first [DATA EXPUNGED] is coming up.

**********~
Turn 38
**********~

META TURN:
A pedestal...

Goals
Find the keycard stations.

Current Soundtrack
Sanctuary

Actions

RW: Open lol.jpg and FedMail.lnk. Then open docs?

(...) You open lol.jpg.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

You look in the docs folder and find a lot of lolcats, as well as some personal text documents. Finally, you open FedMail.lnk.

Code: [Select]

Welcome to FedMail! Please Login.

Username: _


Meta: Opps sorry! Repeat previous action

(...) John struggles and slaps at you, but you hold him still and expertly wrap up his hand. You even manage to stop the bleeding!

Meta: Flail around some more intending to administer punishment on whoever violated the chain of command.

(...) You don't really get much slappin' done, and someone holds your hands down. You feel the pain in your hand being soothed.

Meta: Go explore somewhere nobody else has been before.

(...) You walk into the sector 3 storage room and look around. Looks like a lot of standard supplies that you would find on a ship like this, mostly non-perishable food and tools.

Meta: Investigate blue pedestal.  Use uncanny prediction to determine whether this holds a keycard, and how to retrieve it.

(...) John follows you to the pedestal, and walks so closely behind you that you trip. You can tell there's no keycard in there though.

You all hear a metal grinding noise from somewhere nearby.

Status
Player: dermonster
Name: Derek L.
Occupation: Video game Developer/designer.
Currently: PERICLASE\Main\Weapons Dept.\Private\A26363450>_
Inventory: Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Splint | Bottle of Painkillers | Metal Bar | Mecha-spider (commanding)
Wounds: None
Abilities: Code Expert | Neckbeard | NERD RAEG
Player: Frelock
Name: Frederick Stephonavich
Occupation: Actuary (Knowing probabilities of things)
Currently: Laying on his face.
Inventory: Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Medical Scalpel
Wounds: Missing Arm | Heavy Bleeding
Abilities: Uncanny Prediction | Actuary's Lament | Tweak the Odds
Player: monk12
Name: Monk
Occupation: Troper
Description: Characteristically wears nice hats. Top hats, pirate hats, fedoras, you name it. Hopefully still has one in his possession.
Currently: Looking through the storage room.
Inventory: Moist Top Hat | Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Frag Grenade x3 | Plasma Rifle
Wounds: None
Abilities: Applied Phlebotinum | TV Tropes Will Ruin Your Life | MacGyvering | Telekinesis
Player: HighEndNoob
Name: Kyle Hammers
Occupation: Janitor
Currently: Healing John.
Inventory: Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Mop | Floor Buffer | Rubber Gloves | Medkit
Wounds: Broken Nose
Abilities: That's The Power of Pinesol, Bitch! | Clean Freak | Custodial Might | EMT
Player: _DivideByZero_
Name: John Freeman
Occupation: Drill Sergeant
Currently: Following Frederick.
Inventory: Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit
Wounds: Light Bleeding | Broken Hand
Abilities: Major Payne | Fullmetal Jacket | Apocalypse Now

Locations
The S.S. Periclase
Main Deck
Maintenance Deck 3, Main Elevator
EARTH!
Elevator Controls
Interrogation Room 7E-365 (Deck M3): You were all shackled to chairs in here when you woke up. The door has been dropkicked off its hinges. There's circuitry on the walls, a row of monitors, and a row of 5 chairs.

Spoiler: INITIATING RTD ROUTINE (click to show/hide)

FANTASY TURN:

Clear waters lie between you and Helmath!

Goals
"KIDNAP THE MAYOR OF THIS TOWN AND ESCAPE" Complete!
Throw Ogomspoxom into the fires of Mt. Helmath!

Current Soundtrack
Ocean Redux

Actions

FW: Overheat Urists beard. TAKE BACK TEH KITTEH.

(...) With a flick of the wrist, you set Urist's head on fire! He starts yelling and running in circles! You grab the kitty and back away.

Fantasy: Wake up divide before Nist is butchered. Or after, just to heal my ankle.

(...) So the guy carrying a barrel of gunpowder runs at the guy on fire. Yup. (...) Urist runs at you screaming and you attempt to get out of the way, but he leaps onto your back! His flaming beard brushes at the barrel!

Fantasy: Lock the door and wait for the spiral to end. Urist is too dwarfy to take the logical course of action.

(...) You try to close the door, but a berserking mason runs into the room, steals Nist and throws a flaming goat intestine at your face! AHHHH, your beard is on fire! You begin running in circles on the ship's deck, and jump onto someone's back!

Fantasy: Check on the demon, make sure he's not being evil. Then continue sailing.

(...) You check on the demon, taking the navigation wheel with you. Looks like he's still passed out. Still looks evil, though- you look down at your hands and realize you ripped the navigation wheel off the deck.

Fantasy: Use the rigging like monkey bars to get back down to the deck.

(...)You slip and begin plummeting to the deck below!

Status
Player: dermonster
Name: Derm Hell-binder
Occupation: Elemental Mage/Summoner.
Currently: Wishing he hadn't lit Urist on fire.
Inventory: Robes | Spiffy Hat | Left Upper Canine Tooth | Keyring | George (commanding) | Sword | Armor
Wounds: Missing Tooth | Black Eye
Abilities: Gift of the Magi (...) | Squishy Wizard | Summoner (...) | Water Blast | Superheat
Player: Frelock
Name: Frelock Von-Heisenberg
Occupation: Luck-o-mancer (Manipulating probabilities of things)
Currently: Falling.
Inventory: Gold Coin | Peasant Robes | Golden Pocket Watch | Sack o' Gold | Map of Westport | Long Sword | Armor | Spring Shoes
Wounds: None
Abilities: Smooth Criminal | Accident Waiting to Happen | Befuddlement
Player: monk12
Name: Edgar
Occupation: Sky Pirate
Currently: Reenacting an old pirate joke.
Inventory: Sleeveless Long Coat | Grappling Hook | Harpoon Gun | Armor
Wounds: Right Forearm Missing
Abilities: Booze Power | Terraphobia | Side-quest Radar
Player: HighEndNoob
Name: HighEndNoob
Occupation: Ninja Sniper
Currently: Lugging around a barrel of gunpowder WITH A FLAMING DWARF ON IT.
Inventory: Robe | Throwing Star x1 | Throwing Dagger x18 | Sword | Musket | Musket Ammo x35 | Barrel of Gunpowder
Wounds: Missing Tooth | Broken Ankle
Abilities: Immaculate Aim | Clumsy Fighter | 'Splode On Impact
Player: _DivideByZero_
Name: Urist Anvilsmasher
Occupation: Soap Maker
Description
Currently: Screaming, flaming, etc.
Inventory: Pig Tail Fiber Robe | Cave Spider Silk Shoes x2 | Bar of Kitten Tallow Soap | Battle Axe
Wounds: None
Abilities: Dabbling Surgeon (...) | Meager Social Ability | Martial Trance
Name: George
Description: A 1.5-foot-tall rat with a scorpion stinger, gills and fins! He takes orders from Derm.
Inventory: None
Wounds: None
Abilities: Amphibious

Locations
Hellfire Cove
The Borealis
Condition:
Sunk
Westport
Mayor's Ogomspoxom's Former Manor

[Dermonster]

RW: Get off my ass and check out the grinding noise.. (Why was I spending so much time on here?)

FW: Water blast Urist

[monk12]

I can't help but notice the only one to succeed in the fantasy world was the one who set the dwarf on fire.

Meta: Loot!

Fantasy: Shove the wheel back in the deck, hope it works.


Ships work like that, right? Riiiiiiight?