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[bowdown2q]

Meta: what I did last time, but with less fail.

Fantasy: GTFO with the mayor and Monk. Make sure the mayor isnt, like, DEAD.

[Roy Greenhilt]

Queue Please
Meta
    * Name: Roy Greenhilt
    * Occupation: Otaku/Troper
    * Personality/Appearance: Stays awake whilst on forums, average height/slightly slim build, Aspergers Syndrome (IRL )
Fantasy:
    * Name: Roy Greenhilt
    * Occupation: Intelligent Fighter / Leader of the Order of the Stick
    * Personality/Appearance: As per the comic Law:75 Chaos:25 Good:90 Evil:10
(can i get the starmetal sword?)

[Gatleos]

Queue Please
Meta
    * Name: Roy Greenhilt
    * Occupation: Otaku/Troper
    * Personality/Appearance: Stays awake whilst on forums, average height/slightly slim build, Aspergers Syndrome (IRL )
Fantasy:
    * Name: Roy Greenhilt
    * Occupation: Intelligent Fighter / Leader of the Order of the Stick
    * Personality/Appearance: As per the comic Law:75 Chaos:25 Good:90 Evil:10
(can i get the starmetal sword?)

Added!

Ever seen an 8 in RTD? Ever seen two in a row?

**********~
Turn 14
**********~

META TURN:

DRONES: SCRAMBLE THE DRONES

Goals
Find the keycard stations.

Current Soundtrack
Final Flight

Actions

RW: Attempt to tear up jumpsuit leggings and use them as bandages. Mecha: Hide in the elevator.

(...) The mecha-spider skids to a halt in the elevator, and you rip off the ends of your jumpsuit leggings to use as bandages. You wrap one around your bleeding leg, and use the other one as a tourniquet to stop the bleeding. You've stopped most of the blood loss, but there's still a HUGE METAL BAR stuck in your leg.

Meta: See what the other group is doing, and figure out how to make them help us without their knowledge.

(...) They kind of ran away.

Meta: Use debris to MacGyver up a blast shield to protect against the drone explosions.

(...) Summoning the powers of the divine engineer, you grab the burning metal off of your legs and all the debris laying around you and fuse it together into... an... energy shield?! The energy shield powers up and gives you protection from the shrapnel! As it does so, electricity begins to arc from the surface of the shield and lash out at nearby electronics! It begins to fizzle with energy overload!

Meta: Army-Crawl to the elevator, with the aid of the GM somehow.

(...) You activate the GM and allow it to drag you along the hangar floor toward the elevator! You crash into the back of the elevator and collapse in a heap.

Meta: what I did last time, but with less fail.

(...) You try to heave Monk into a sitting position, but slip and fall again. *SIIIIIIIIIIGH*

Shrapnel Everywhere!

• dermonster: (...) You're in the elevator, the shrapnel can't reach you.
• Frelock: (...) You quickly step out of the way of the flying shrapnel. It doesn't even graze you.
• monk12: (...)The energy shield effortlessly vaporizes the chunks of flying metal and lasers, and the arcing electricity begins to intensify! Massive bolts of electricity begin to strike the drones, causing even more shrapnel to fly in every direction! The lights in the hangar begin to flicker as the energy shield saps electricity from them and begins to crackle loudly. Finally, a bolt even bigger than the rest shoots across the room and with a deafening BANG strikes the force-field! You know, the only one separating you from the vacuum of space? The shield starts to drain energy at an alarming rate!
• HighEndNoob: (...) The shrapnel and lasers can't reach you in the elevator.
• bowdown2q: (...) You manage to crouch under the violently pulsating shield as shrapnel is annihilated around you!

21 Drones Remain

Status
Player: dermonster
Name: Derek L.
Occupation: Video game Developer/designer.
Currently: Riding the mecha-spider - he has no choice, really.
Inventory: Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Splint | Bottle of Painkillers | Metal Bar | Mecha-spider (commanding)
Wounds: Heavy Bleeding x2 | Light Bleeding
Abilities: Code Expert | Neckbeard | NERD RAEG
Player: Frelock
Name: Frederick Stephonavich
Occupation: Actuary (Knowing probabilities of things)
Currently: Standing in the hangar, dodging shrapnel.
Inventory: Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Medical Scalpel
Wounds: Missing Arm | Light Bleeding
Abilities: Uncanny Prediction | Actuary's Lament | Tweak the Odds
Player: monk12
Name: Monk
Occupation: Troper
Description: Characteristically wears nice hats. Top hats, pirate hats, fedoras, you name it. Hopefully still has one in his possession.
Currently: Struggling to hold the energy shield stable.
Inventory: Moist Top Hat | Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Frag Grenade x3 | Plasma Rifle | Energy Shield
Wounds: Broken Finger | Broken Leg x2
Abilities: Applied Phlebotinum | TV Tropes Will Ruin Your Life | MacGyvering
Player: HighEndNoob
Name: Kyle Hammers
Occupation: Janitor
Currently: Laying in the elevator.
Inventory: Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Mop | Floor Buffer | Rubber Gloves
Wounds: None
Abilities: That's The Power of Pinesol, Bitch! | Clean Freak | Custodial Might
Player: bowdown2q
Name: Paulie
Occupation: "Protection"
Description: My friend, it would be best... if you didn't know, capiche?
Currently: Crouching next to Monk.
Inventory: Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Hand Cast | Box o' Gauze | Stimpak
Wounds: Broken Hand
Abilities: Blackhand | Dumb Muscle | Go For Broke

Locations
Maintenance Deck 3
EARTH!
Elevator Controls
Interrogation Room 7E-365 (Deck M3): You were all shackled to chairs in here when you woke up. The door has been dropkicked off its hinges. There's circuitry on the walls, a row of monitors, and a row of 5 chairs.
Medical Bay (Deck M3): It's got a ton of medical supplies, a surgical table, and a medical robot.
Janitor's Closet (Deck M3): Full of precious cleaning supplies!
Central Medical Bay (Main Deck): The main medical bay.
Cryogenics and Prosthetics Lab (Main Deck): It's in the central medical bay. Sounds interesting.
Hangar (Hangar Bay): A huge room used to receive smaller ships. The drones have been scrambled!

Spoiler: INITIATING RTD ROUTINE (click to show/hide)

FANTASY TURN:

The guards are invading the manor! They're everywhere!

Goals
"KIDNAP THE MAYOR OF THIS TOWN AND ESCAPE"

Current Soundtrack
The Koan of Drums

Actions

FW: Rats grab key bring to me. Unlock door with key. (Why didn't I think of that...)

(...) The rats can't seem to find the keys, and one of them explodes for some reason. You have 2 left.

Fantasy: Stuff loot into my sack, grab a rope from one of the thieves, and repel down from the balcony.

(...) More guards begin running up the stairs, so you grab a rope from one of the thieves and tie it to the balcony railing. (...) None of the guards spot you as you rappel down the side of the building. You join Edgar and Artymir.

Fantasy: Get the Mayor to the boat!

(...) Frelock and Artymir heave the mayor into the air as you all run toward the boat. You see a group of guards arrive at the top of the balcony and swing your grappling hook at one! (...) The grappling hook wraps around the guard's waist and you pull him over the edge! He falls to the ground in a heap as the other guards begin to descend the rope. Your wounded arm leaves a thick trail of blood as you sprint toward the boat, and you feel faint.

Fantasy: Get off the roof and onto the ground.

(...) Well, you manage to get off of the roof. You slam into the balcony railing as you fall, breaking your ankle! You then land on a group of three guards below the balcony.

Fantasy: GTFO with the mayor and Monk. Make sure the mayor isnt, like, DEAD.

(...) You slip, causing Frelock to drop the mayor! It feels familiar somehow. The mayor doesn't appear to be dead.

Status
Player: dermonster
Name: Derm Hell-binder
Occupation: Elemental Mage/Summoner.
Currently: In the barracks prison, being bored.
Inventory: Robes | Spiffy Hat | Left Upper Canine Tooth | Rats x2 (commanding)
Wounds: Missing Tooth
Abilities: Gift of the Magi (...) | Squishy Wizard | Summoner (...) | Water Blast
Player: Frelock
Name: Frelock Von-Heisenberg
Occupation: Luck-o-mancer (Manipulating probabilities of things)
Currently: Running to the boat.
Inventory: Gold Coin | Peasant Robes | Golden Pocket Watch | Sack o' Gold | Map of Westport | Long Sword x3 | Chain Mail x3 | Helmet x3
Wounds: None
Abilities: Smooth Criminal | Accident Waiting to Happen | Befuddlement
Player: monk12
Name: Edgar
Occupation: Sky Pirate
Currently: Running toward the sloop.
Inventory: Sleeveless Long Coat | Grappling Hook | Harpoon Gun
Wounds: Right Forearm Missing | Heavy Bleeding
Abilities: Booze Power | Terraphobia | Side-quest Radar
Player: HighEndNoob
Name: HighEndNoob
Occupation: Ninja Sniper
Currently: Laying under the balcony in a daze.
Inventory: Robe | Throwing Star x1 | Mask | Pebble | Throwing Dagger x20
Wounds: Broken Ankle
Abilities: Immaculate Aim | Clumsy Fighter | 'Splode On Impact
Player: bowdown2q
Name: Artymir
Occupation: !!SCIENCE!!
Description: Being a scientist means never having to say you know what you're doing. Being a RUSSIAN scientist means never having a budget unless it can go HORRIBLY WRONG.
Inventory: Lab Coat | Monocle | Spring Shoes | Slingshot
Currently: Running to the boat.
Wounds: Face Scar
Abilities: Menace | Before I Kill You, Mr. Bond | Mad Scientist

Locations
Westport Map

Tavern: Generic-looking. It's midnight now, the tavern is closed.
Thieves' Guild: The now-abandoned weapon shop basement.
Prison: It's in the barracks. The female warrior from the tavern is locked in one of the cells.

[Dermonster]

RW: Pop another painkiller and pull bar out of leg. Use more rags to patch up the hole. Spider: Drag monk to elevator

FW: Rats: Get keys.

[RedWarrior0]

I'm present. Had a temporary suspension of rights, though.

[Frelock]

Meta: Yell at everyone to get back into the elevator, run back there myself, then prepare to push the door close button at the appropriate time again.

Fantasy: Pick up the mayor again and get to the ship!

[monk12]

Crap crap crap... WWMD?

Meta: Make a space helmet out of anything within reach. Repent sins.

Fantasy: Try not to pass out on the way to the boat. Time permitting, attempt to heal self.

[HighEndNoob]

Oh carp
Meta: try to turn my rubber gloves into air-tanks
Fantasy: Get up and run to the docks.

[bowdown2q]

Meta: flee to elevator

Fantasy: let the guy with the mayor go ahead, the follow a few steps behind so I donlt nat'l 1 my way into our collective failure.

[Gatleos]

You might be screwed, Monk. No one wants to help you.
EDIT: Oh, the mecha-spider is coming.

[Darvi]

You might be screwed, Monk. No one wants to help you.

I don't think nobody would want to help him. Merely nobody participating in the game. And the Random number god.

[Gatleos]

Will the band of kidnappers escape from the town guard? Will Monk be spared from the vacuum of space?! Tune in next time to find out; same meta-time, same meta-channel!
Or, y'know, right now in this thread.

**********~
Turn 15
**********~

META TURN:

The force-field will implode any second!

Goals
Find the keycard stations.

Current Soundtrack
Final Flight

Actions

RW: Pop another painkiller and pull bar out of leg. Use more rags to patch up the hole. Spider: Drag monk to elevator

(...) You take a pain pill, summon all of your strength and yank the bar out of your leg! You're bleeding a lot more now, so you rip off more jumpsuit to use as a bandage. You get it mostly patched up, but the bleeding won't stop and it's an open wound. You order the mecha-spider to save Monk. It gallops back into the hangar, and...

Meta: Yell at everyone to get back into the elevator, run back there myself, then prepare to push the door close button at the appropriate time again.

(...) "Everybody back to the elevator now!" you yell as the force-field begins to pulsate violently. You run back into the elevator and hover your finger over the door close button.

Meta: Make a space helmet out of anything within reach. Repent sins.

(...) You quickly reach for a fallen ceiling light and shape the warped glass into the form of a space helmet by hovering it over the scorching hot energy shield. Now you have a glass fish-bowl which will in no way help you survive in space, but it's a start. You see your inevitable fate and repent your sins all over your jumpsuit. (...) Suddenly, the mecha-spider grabs you by the collar and begins to drag you toward the elevator! An arc of electricity shoots out of the shield and the mecha-spider begins to slow down about halfway to the door as the energy shield saps its energy. The force-field is highly unstable now!

Meta: try to turn my rubber gloves into air-tanks

(...) You blow into your rubber gloves, only to realize that you can't breathe carbon dioxide.

Meta: flee to elevator

(...) You get out from under the energy shield and run screaming toward the elevator! You're almost there...

Shrapnel Everywhere!

• dermonster: (...) You're in the elevator, the shrapnel can't reach you.
• Frelock: (...) The shrapnel can't get to you in the elevator.
• monk12: (...) You can't hold the shield steady anymore, and have to lower it for a moment. A piece of burning metal grazes your arm!
• HighEndNoob: (...) The shrapnel and lasers can't reach you in the elevator.
• bowdown2q: (...) A piece of metal lands in front of you and you trip! Luckily you're uninjured.

12 Drones Remain

Status
Player: dermonster
Name: Derek L.
Occupation: Video game Developer/designer.
Currently: Tending to wounds.
Inventory: Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Splint | Bottle of Painkillers | Metal Bar | Mecha-spider (commanding)
Wounds: Heavy Bleeding x2 | Light Bleeding
Abilities: Code Expert | Neckbeard | NERD RAEG
Player: Frelock
Name: Frederick Stephonavich
Occupation: Actuary (Knowing probabilities of things)
Currently: Standing in the elevator, preparing to close the door.
Inventory: Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Medical Scalpel
Wounds: Missing Arm | Light Bleeding
Abilities: Uncanny Prediction | Actuary's Lament | Tweak the Odds
Player: monk12
Name: Monk
Occupation: Troper
Description: Characteristically wears nice hats. Top hats, pirate hats, fedoras, you name it. Hopefully still has one in his possession.
Currently: Struggling to hold the energy shield stable.
Inventory: Moist Top Hat | Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Frag Grenade x3 | Plasma Rifle | Energy Shield
Wounds: Broken Finger | Broken Leg x2 | Light Bleeding
Abilities: Applied Phlebotinum | TV Tropes Will Ruin Your Life | MacGyvering
Player: HighEndNoob
Name: Kyle Hammers
Occupation: Janitor
Currently: Laying in the elevator.
Inventory: Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Mop | Floor Buffer | Rubber Gloves
Wounds: None
Abilities: That's The Power of Pinesol, Bitch! | Clean Freak | Custodial Might
Player: bowdown2q
Name: Paulie
Occupation: "Protection"
Description: My friend, it would be best... if you didn't know, capiche?
Currently: Struggling toward the elevator.
Inventory: Explosive Collar | Jumpsuit | Hand Cast | Box o' Gauze | Stimpak
Wounds: Broken Hand
Abilities: Blackhand | Dumb Muscle | Go For Broke

Locations
Maintenance Deck 3
EARTH!
Elevator Controls
Interrogation Room 7E-365 (Deck M3): You were all shackled to chairs in here when you woke up. The door has been dropkicked off its hinges. There's circuitry on the walls, a row of monitors, and a row of 5 chairs.
Medical Bay (Deck M3): It's got a ton of medical supplies, a surgical table, and a medical robot.
Janitor's Closet (Deck M3): Full of precious cleaning supplies!
Central Medical Bay (Main Deck): The main medical bay.
Cryogenics and Prosthetics Lab (Main Deck): It's in the central medical bay. Sounds interesting.
Hangar (Hangar Bay): A huge room used to receive smaller ships. The drones have been scrambled!

Spoiler: INITIATING RTD ROUTINE (click to show/hide)

FANTASY TURN:

The guards are invading the manor! They're everywhere!

Goals
"KIDNAP THE MAYOR OF THIS TOWN AND ESCAPE"

Current Soundtrack
The Koan of Drums

Actions

FW: Rats: Get keys.

(...) One of the rats manages to find a key on one of the dead guards! Then it just... stands there with it. Out of reach.

Fantasy: Pick up the mayor again and get to the ship!

(...) Artymir steps back and you begin to drag the mayor toward the ship! You can hear more guards coming from the manor. You run along the eastern dock, find the sloop, and begin ascending the gangplank.

Fantasy: Try not to pass out on the way to the boat. Time permitting, attempt to heal self.

(...) You fight to stay conscious as Frelock carries the mayor off, but Artymir suddenly punches you in the face! You're out cold and losing a dangerous amount of blood!

Fantasy: Get up and run to the docks.

(...) Despite your broken ankle, you manage to struggle to your feet and hobble toward the docks. You can hear more guards coming!

Fantasy: let the guy with the mayor go ahead, the follow a few steps behind so I donlt nat'l 1 my way into our collective failure.

(...) Frelock runs off with the mayor. In your panic, you begin mumbling about "donlt nat'l" or some other nonsense, trip AGAIN, and accidentally punch Edgar in the face on the way down.

Status
Player: dermonster
Name: Derm Hell-binder
Occupation: Elemental Mage/Summoner.
Currently: "I hate you, rats."
Inventory: Robes | Spiffy Hat | Left Upper Canine Tooth | Rats x2 (commanding)
Wounds: Missing Tooth
Abilities: Gift of the Magi (...) | Squishy Wizard | Summoner (...) | Water Blast
Player: Frelock
Name: Frelock Von-Heisenberg
Occupation: Luck-o-mancer (Manipulating probabilities of things)
Currently: Running to the boat.
Inventory: Gold Coin | Peasant Robes | Golden Pocket Watch | Sack o' Gold | Map of Westport | Long Sword x3 | Chain Mail x3 | Helmet x3
Wounds: None
Abilities: Smooth Criminal | Accident Waiting to Happen | Befuddlement
Player: monk12
Name: Edgar
Occupation: Sky Pirate
Currently: Out cold.
Inventory: Sleeveless Long Coat | Grappling Hook | Harpoon Gun
Wounds: Facial Bruise | Faint | Right Forearm Missing | Heavy Bleeding
Abilities: Booze Power | Terraphobia | Side-quest Radar
Player: HighEndNoob
Name: HighEndNoob
Occupation: Ninja Sniper
Currently: Hobbling toward the boat.
Inventory: Robe | Throwing Star x1 | Mask | Pebble | Throwing Dagger x20
Wounds: Broken Ankle
Abilities: Immaculate Aim | Clumsy Fighter | 'Splode On Impact
Player: bowdown2q
Name: Artymir
Occupation: !!SCIENCE!!
Description: Being a scientist means never having to say you know what you're doing. Being a RUSSIAN scientist means never having a budget unless it can go HORRIBLY WRONG.
Inventory: Lab Coat | Monocle | Spring Shoes | Slingshot
Currently: Wallowing in FAILURE.
Wounds: Face Scar
Abilities: Menace | Before I Kill You, Mr. Bond | Mad Scientist

Locations

Mayor's Manor
Tavern: Generic-looking. It's midnight now, the tavern is closed.
Thieves' Guild: The now-abandoned weapon shop basement.
Prison: It's in the barracks. The female warrior from the tavern is locked in one of the cells.

[Dermonster]

RW: Order spider to shut down all nonessential systems and focus on returning to me.

FW: RATS. COME TO ME.

[Gatleos]

In case you were wondering, the force-field will go out on the next turn. You're cutting it close!

[Frelock]

META:Shout encouragement to my companions, encouraging them to get in the freaking elevator!  Push button so the door closes just before the force-field goes down, regardless of the location of comrades.  Bemoan lost comrades, if necessary.

Fantasy:Make ready to sail.