"HE'S FUCKING NUTS!" cried a markata in the jungle.
Back in the less civilized parts of Lanka proper, L.Ron Hubbard was embarking on a carpet-flight with his wife Mary Sue. Mary Sue was openly disturbed:
-"But dear, are you 100% sure that PalazzoDiesThisTime is Xenu? Would our greatest enemy run from our advancing crusaders rather than stand and fight, or at least send a squadron or two of DC-10s to steal our thetans and deposit them in a volcano for exploding? Perhaps our cryptologist made a mistake?"
-"Shut your mouth woman! I know that you and that Abysian prophet have been exchanging passionate letters while I was gone. Don't you dare defending them now. But, however misguided you might be, there is a sliver of truth in your words, and being endlessly compassionate on Thursdays I will explain it to you. I have been following the decryption effort very closely, and have noticed that there were more than one possible explanations of the cryptic messages hidden in my own book! The conflicting messages include not only that PalazzoDiesThisTime is Xenu, but also that Fhionnuisce is Xenu, the Horned Prince is Xenu, that Cassette is Xenu, One Eyed Pete is Xenu, and Your Mother is Xenu."
-"But... which one is the real Xenu then?" Asked confused Mary Sue.
-"Why, all of them of course(especially your mother). I have already ordered my faithful servants to prepare for an all-out war with the evil Xenus of Middle Earth. They march as we speak."
"HE'S FUCKING NUTS!" cried a markata in the jungle, but there was no one to hear it.