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[FearfulJesuit]

Yes, I know it's more or less nonsensical. Everything in it is in it for a reason. It's actually the first part of what I want to be a larger poem.
---------------------






I. Cride

Raheł er Raheli
ἐκ Ραχέλην venerunt
then three and one and another are two and one
or to hope
that one IS three and one
      2
      is
   d'où qu'elle est
   I and she is not.
   o ha ha
   its so irrational
drain the river elves fill up the river
filler
filling with filler
heart filler
in the river where we drown
we drown, we drown
all of us drown together
i do not
drown
with her
and where SHE is from SHE is not.

Reason assigned
and reason believed
and believed too is passion
to the assigner of reason
destroing reason
the passion unknown
and the reason exalted
are one
is or nída?
biid
7ace to Face
and Face to 7ace
Drang drang
to fall
      fall   
         fall
arms      her      arms
      
      assigner
      assigneress
      an dhun dhin
      dhun, dhin
      dhin, dhun
one ago on two
the cookie said to me
and she smiled
and none ago on twenty and something born
(or twenty and something ago nothing born)
at hug it is hard to remember
5 in one and 3 on 1 and 2 and 1 on 2
then the blood
out out
whyi deed ye
the back the back
wherein what is conceived after twenty and something then it does not conceive and still is wanted
and we
that is i
picked the violets
of (and or) hwæt we ate there there is no more
there there
there, there? hie is he and then hie new is born scæ and scæ is neither he nor hie are
or (and of) what we wish to eat
we may not touch

the king may not
may not
king of nothing
         fall      fall
            





                   fall
         me
         me

(her)          her       
         


         AIRCHINN

[Supermikhail]

Which reminds me that a teacher curating a class (I don't know what that's called in English) that I've assigned myself to talked to me today about a peculiar student that wrote horrific Gothic poetry last year and this year has apparently turned autistic.

Er. I perceive a lot of sexual imagery, otherwise, I don't read Greek and my knowledge of French is very limited, my guess is that meant "Where is she from?"

Are grammar and typos intentional, too?

[Argembarger]

What grammar?

No, but really, nice poem. I enjoy Avant stuff like this.

[FearfulJesuit]

Here's part II, which is probably even more nonsensical.
II. Ingen
Dhin dhun
airchinn?
I is yesterday and II is now
to walk in
that we may eat what we want
and what we want
we may not eat
dhun dhin
first we go
and then we eat
and second we go
take the cookie
V cookie
a budget cookie
or i say
a stale cookie
open broken
shattered cookie
☺                                              ☺
       people are attracted
       by your delicate features
softly ṡoftly
smile ṡmile
                     eyebrow









eyebrow        eyes
rosca caéna
walk in
(have) walked in
here's the birthday girl!
is related to me
what to get her
what together
hug                       her                     hug
yes a hug
you need a hug (i love you)
then the turtle
the turtle flies away

again the sunsetting

at ten a friday night

the lonesome
cuddle cuddle thru the window into the flat
ḫaaaa

wait wait
cannot wait
lobhaḥ lobhaḥ tvaṃ lubhyami

poke poke
and eyebrows raised confuse the heart
to say 'Rakhel sru ħu yeʔ mum ħwim ħaun'
we go to the field of battle
in war (a cridiu) can not be won
we
bahaha

2 fights and does not know and 1 fights but may not be known to fight
SO CHARGE
be slaughtered but by no army
CHARGE UP STAIRS
past many Cubas and the same-named clear mountain dyed red (to be continued)
but no be kicked out all is lost

die die die die
live? live? live? live?

and we long for those before us
for there is no more MORE! MORE! MORE! MORE!
Charge for the panda.
Cry "creepy" and let loose the panda of war

now for what panda is shouter live and where pandas are none are

but for whom no panda is there is no love and for whom panda is screamed there is and panda is not love
the music sent by umpteen is to think of umpeteen and some more used

μῆνιν  ἄειδε  θεὰ
μῆνιν, μῆνιν
ἔρως
ἔρως Ῥαχελῇ
Ῥαχελῆ
Rāśale
Reh₂ḱele!
Reh₂ḱele!
tewe reh₂ḱelos ne h₁esti
lewb^h-
lewb^h-
lewb^h-

----------------------

Er. I perceive a lot of sexual imagery, otherwise, I don't read Greek and my knowledge of French is very limited, my guess is that meant "Where is she from?"

Well, it is a love poem, so yeah, you can see that.

[Argembarger]

I personally liked the first part better. The first one is more surreal, it feels like you're making a coherent point but that it is sort of distant and faded. The second one just seems kind of... random, and silly, in my opinion.

It's really hard to critique avant-garde works, but those are my thoughts.

[FearfulJesuit]

I personally liked the first part better. The first one is more surreal, it feels like you're making a coherent point but that it is sort of distant and faded. The second one just seems kind of... random, and silly, in my opinion.

It's really hard to critique avant-garde works, but those are my thoughts.

Yeah, if you feel like that, sure. I'm going to put these through some editing after I finish, anyway.

[Vector]

I'd suggest that you stop writing odes to your history teacher and get on with your life.


At the moment, it seems more "precious" and incoherent than meaningful, so... maybe try practicing in English, first, before you move on to post-modernist surrealism?

[Supermikhail]

Seconded. Because funny.

Also, because... aren't you supposed to be able to read poetry to appreciate it?... and nobody can read smileys, and "lewb to the h's power" doesn't sound too nice? Or maybe you're supposed to appreciate the visual style? But then for the most part it's kind of regular same-y.

Thoughts of a layman.

[Enzo]

You should give these to this Rachel girl, I hear chicks dig romantic poetry something fierce.

[Supermikhail]

Some chicks probably do. But some chicks are polite.

[Dwarf]

I'd suggest that you stop writing odes to your history teacher and get on with your life.


At the moment, it seems more "precious" and incoherent than meaningful, so... maybe try practicing in English, first, before you move on to post-modernist surrealism?

I wanted to point this out, but Vector was faster.

[FearfulJesuit]

Part III.
---------
III. The hies and the scæ

In the
In the beginning
Hibernia wæs. Native Hibernia
Nay- ere Hibernia *waz the country road
Sister of the assigneress the road
And now we wander down.
Then native Hibernia blonde and prickly
I the great mathematician and advice was given be not.
Then on against York in true Hereford wæs.
True Hereford I say, and there was truth.
Truth Cymrian as did they run away to join true Hereford.
And he veered off the course to say what did I think and he was right
but there was man
Later did I write but nay hie said (the hie rational) nay taken.
And on Ulawa and Sa'apo and when hie wæs those the bēc used
And nay again.
And then scæ not hie is met had been hired but scæ is not THAT scæ yet
nay yet
nay yet we scæl get to scæ!
ḫaḫa will hie we will
then do we to nine come as should be eight for eight is twice and four and five are one and zero is zero.
There hie wæs o o pretty and smart no?
and the group in the hūs of bēc and the pretty eyes i to dinner took and dance but did not dance.
HIE seized hie in fedora
but o non sumus sororēs
but then HE seized hie in fedora
o i forget myself
well then þæt?
this hie wæs with karel and not carl no other hie with carl wæs.
nothing in nine remember I
the summer
the summer the summer there are two
first from ængland
but hie yelled and hated
second- oh why do i say
hie is scæ in my mind
but gone
i dance i dance i cannot say
fall sick, and she is gone away
gone gone o gone
note written written write again
ic lufie þē
and said hie lied to me

o why?
and then dekm then dekm

but first after dekm

ah yah i loved dinner that the only dinner (perhaps i might have paid) ĀC
let's remain friends
then (diediediedielivelivelivelive!) i love you
i am not sure that i do
PROKIO, PROKIO, VLERË?
kai mikrophthalmaporne m'eromais but she is far
far far they are all far
and now sarai sarae
first the many camps o i know you not
now ice mountain ah sorry i've someone else
oh and hai i'm a quiz bowl girl
my teammate says you're scary
perhaps. have tea.

reh2ḱele?
o hai!
and notice what may not be, wish what may not be wanted
were YOU my competition
fighting me for the right
to run your fingers through her hair
and look into her eyes?
non. je suis seul en ça.
beauty appreciated by what cannot appreciate it
no better than beauty appreciated not
what are you crazy 
you don't want to
run your fingers through her shining hair and stare into her eyes
crazy call
do you are you

night night
im nočen sonai dy ilat žiraču
climb into the window and say
"je suis ton amor, venu pour te tenir"

řo, řo! i write i write eř lübao notcharaimm twe lubhyemi EI ŽINA ESË.
night
night
and maybe on the morrow
the morrow the morrow
there is no morrow there is only now
et tē credō ut sit
credō credō

eh3 reh2ḱele
i offer up my innocence
i am repaid with scorn
a hug a hug aye a hug
the turtle the turtle
the awkward turtle to my mind and there it lays its eggs

pay attention pay attention
say yes say yes yes ma'am
o but i was looking
your eyes your eyes
you can't she's not your age
what's age what's age
eyes have no age love no age...

o you know those carnations of february i shall send one
you cannot they do not work that way
what's love that's not expressed?
i don't care you can't have it
i'll die if i cannot
die! sayeth friends
die! sayeth the law
die! sayeth good advice
die! do i hope scæ scæl not say

hwæt doth scæ say? think?

on chnleqde jarthththththththththththththththththththththththththththththththththth mbbôth

on nlîth xôp mbbôthsh qôch li on ndud

pax sedet in corda illae
o corda cordam illae volo nunc
non possum habere.

non possum
non possum
non possum

mors amori
mors amoris
mors amore

[sonerohi]

Oh wait, is this the same guy that was reciting his teachers name? I'm going to hope Grakelin stumbles across this in his roflcopter.

[Vector]

Oh wait, is this the same guy that was reciting his teachers name? I'm going to hope Grakelin stumbles across this in his roflcopter.

Yes.  It is.  If you're familiar with a number of languages, you can see her name is repeated over and over again throughout the poem.

[Supermikhail]

Oh. Oh. Vector. Vector. Are you familiar with some of them to some degree of competency? If so, I after some thought I figured out a part of the Greek sentence, but what the suffix or the preposition (?) mean I don't know. Any help? Also, after that it's supposed to be Latin, probably, but for some reason I don't care for this language enough to be interested in the word's meaning. Would be cool, though, if it was actually Quenya or something.