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[monk12]

Eat the tasty gloop!

Appraise creatures for loot potential.

[KaguroDraven]

It must be devil witchery! Remove the goggles as they are tainted by the devil and will bring us bad luck!
Fun Fact:Most sailers, even today, are incredibly supersticious and religious.

[Fniff]

Why are you picking up goggles? They obviously don't do anything.

Apart from allow you to see everything, but that's kinda useless, right?

It must be devil witchery! Remove the goggles as they are tainted by the devil and will bring us bad luck!
Fun Fact:Most sailers, even today, are incredibly supersticious and religious.

You scream as the devil goggles don't get off! Magic! Witchery! Devil Worship! MY LORD! You start praying for your soul.

Eat the tasty gloop!

Appraise creatures for loot potential.

You eat the tasty gloop on your nose. Hey, your nose healed. That's probably destroyed your soul. You go to the outside.

Whoa. What in the name of God are you looking at?

It appears to be a creature that an insane god would design as a side project. It stands on two very long legs, with insect like hairs covering it. It is incredibly insect like, really. It doesn't have any eyes, just goggles. It is amazingly creepy.

"Stand and deliver!" You shout and pull out your pistols. They both hit their mark in a puff of smoke. You look for stuff in the alien's...Organic pouches.

You find a very weird looking device that reads "Crafter" and a pistol that looks incredible advanced. You can fit your pistols and the pistol into the crafter. Should you?

[Ricky]

only put the flintlocks into the crafter.

test the new high-tech pistol on something... interesting...


put some gloop in your trusty canteen, which you never, ever let leave your side

[Fniff]

only put the flintlocks into the crafter.

test the new high-tech pistol on something... interesting...


put some gloop in your trusty canteen, which you never, ever let leave your side

But there is whiskey in it!

You look around. Hey, an alien creature. You shoot it with the advanced pistol. It explodes in gore.

Pros: It's perfect for your situation.

Cons: It's looks awful. Your flintlocks look more cool.

The crafter thing should help.

[Ricky]

drink the whiskey. put gloop in the canteen

put one flintlock in the crafter to see what it does, if there it is a one- time use put the hightech pistol in it


go see if there  is anything cool about the alien gore

[Fniff]

drink the whiskey. put gloop in the canteen

put one flintlock in the crafter to see what it does, if there it is a one- time use put the hightech pistol in it


go see if there  is anything cool about the alien gore

You have a status aliment! You are now: Insanely drunk.

You put the, duh uhh, thiggy in the, errr, craffy diggy 'n get a huge pistol! Doihh, COOL! It's one shot, uh, dough. DOIHH!So you put de adbassd diggy in the, errr, craffy diggy 'n get two behy cool lookigg flintlocks! Huh huh!

Less stupid version: You put the pistol in the crafter and get a arge pistol! It's one shot, though. So you put the advanced pistol in the crafter and get two very cool looking plasma flintlocks! They aren't one shot, too.

You look at de gore 'n laugh.

[Demantiae]

This running around naked thing simply won't do. Crazy drunken idea #1: put some chunks of the blasted insect alien into the crafter and hope to get a suit of chitin armour. Chitin armour would look awesome on a duel plasma flintlock wielding space pirate YAR! At least hope for something to cover up the John Thomas...

[Megaman]

Go into a fit of laughing insanity and kiss the corpse.
Start singing like a fool

[Fniff]

This running around naked thing simply won't do. Crazy drunken idea #1: put some chunks of the blasted insect alien into the crafter and hope to get a suit of chitin armour. Chitin armour would look awesome on a duel plasma flintlock wielding space pirate YAR! At least hope for something to cover up the John Thomas...

You already have your clothes on, but what the heeeeeeeeellll.

You vomit. Ewww. Well, you are sober now, somehow.

[quip]

Mourn soberiety.

[Fniff]

Mourn soberiety.

You sing a slow ballad about how you got really drunk and now you are hungover. You almost complete it, but suddenly the ship shakes. Something just exploded!

[quip]

Curse these alien devils and their highly volotile ships! Head towards the souce of the exsplosion to shout at those fools how ships are supposed to be made and where they are supposed to go! If God had wanted them to be in the sky He would of given them wings!

[Fniff]

Curse these alien devils and their highly volotile ships! Head towards the souce of the exsplosion to shout at those fools how ships are supposed to be made and where they are supposed to go! If God had wanted them to be in the sky He would of given them wings!

You walk over to the source of the explosion (The Aliens are scattering around) and explain loudly how a ship should be made, where you should put the things and how to defend against pirates properly. You are halfway when a Norwegian-ish looking guy comes in and starts cutting aliens up with battleaxes.

"Hey, you there. What are you doing?" You ask.

"Hello sir. I was just cutting up people for Odin!" He shouts.

"Odin? Hey, wait. You look like a viking! Why are you speaking the king's english?" You shout.

"Why are you speaking my language so perfectly if you are a foreigner?" Hey, looks like these goggles do loads of things. They are still devil's work, though.

[quip]

Ask him if he wants to wait until after the aliens have learnt why their shipbuilding sucks before sending them to Valhalah(?). Continue lecture regardless.