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Troll on Fire is the best meme ever.

Troll on Fire is terrible, FORE is much better.

I'm still waiting for my dragons!

[KaguroDraven]

Pull the cleaver out of my armor before putting with the rest of my weapons in my *Dog Skin Backpack*

[Zako]

Pull the cleaver out of my armor before putting with the rest of my weapons in my *Dog Skin Backpack*

You mean tying it to your back using your own hair?

[quip]

Consider mocking Krath before joining in his moonwalking since Tarran Terran'll probably kill me as soon as he finds me I should make the most of my short Gobbo life.

[Tarran]

Consider mocking Krath before joining in his moonwalking since Tarran Terran'll probably kill me as soon as he finds me I should make the most of my short Gobbo life.

I wouldn't kill you if you didn't intentionally get my name wrong. Since you did, I will maim and kill you as soon as I see you.

[quip]

Consider mocking Krath before joining in his moonwalking since Tarran Terran'll probably kill me as soon as he finds me I should make the most of my short Gobbo life.

I wouldn't kill you if you didn't intentionally get my name wrong. Since you did, I will maim and kill you as soon as I see you.

Wait, I wasn't on a kill on site list already? I'm hurt!

[FuzzyZergling]

Tarran:
You walk away, because you are entirely too awesome to be dealing with all this goblin shit.
[4] The goblins notice you, and one begins giving chase!
Krath:
You walk back to the prison, but you do it backwards because you are Just. That. Cool.
One of the guards comes barreling down the hall! Shit, you really thought that the whole "goblins want to kill you" thing would just kind of blow over.
MetalSlimeHunt:
You ready your halberd, but the human decides to take the opposite doorway, which is not being guarded by a man with a halberd.
Luckily, Gottric hits him in the head with a hammer. Good work, that.
HighEndNoob:
You bash at the goblin, [1-2] doing pretty much nothing!
[1] The goblin keeps up the pressure, but suddenly he slips and stumbles, and his lock is released!
Hamal has regained the use of his right arm.
kilakan:
You do a flying Elven Kick, [4-2] managing to leap half a meter before collapsing on the ground.
They make it look so easy at the theater.
SeriousConcentrate:
Calling upon the power of some God you heard about in history class once, you throw your hammer!
[6] It strikes him in the head, and he hits the ground unconscious!
You then retrieve your hammer.
Cook is unconscious.
KaguroDraven:
You pull at the cleaver [4-1] and it pops out easily, though it leaves a rather large cut in the copper plating.
You try to put your newfound weapon in your backpack, but you don't have one. [3-2] A nearby potato sack remedies that.
Rikishak now has a potato sack backpack, and is no longer stunned.
quip:
You join the dwarf in his walking-backwards-ness. Sooo coool.
It's a good thing you were facing in that direction, or you would have never noticed the guard heading towards you!

Spoiler: Notes (click to show/hide)

Kaguro/Riki has no modifiers.
Tarran has no modifiers.
Serious/Gottric has -1 to hit (lost eye), -1 to attack (broken hand).
Krath/Urist has -1 to dodge (broken leg), no weapon or armor.
kilikan/Kilikan has -2 to all actions (severe wounds). No proper weapon.
HEN/Hamal has -1 to shield use (battle wound), -2 to hit (blood loss), and is in pain. No armor.
MSH has no armor.
quip/Gump has no modifiers.

Goblin 2 is winded and in pain.

Cook has no weapon or armor. Unconscious.

Aaand I'm back! I assume that your lives were of incredibly lesser quality without me.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

Tie up the Cook and prepare to extract information.

[kilakan]

Attempt to improvise medical supplies out of kitchen items, and heal myself with them.

[Tarran]

Spin-smash the guard in the head.

[Krath]

Do the Thriller and hope the guard joins me.

[quip]

Also do the Thriller while edging away frim Krath.

[HighEndNoob]

Try to end this by shooting the goblin in the head.

[SeriousConcentrate]

Hang out in the background looking menacing while the others deal with Cook.

[TolyK]

I would like to join.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Me: Kobold Female (just dodging lol I wanna not die) with a war axe

[KaguroDraven]

Look for food while they interrigate the human.