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Author Topic: Things that made you absolutely terrified today  (Read 2018521 times)

hops

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17715 on: May 09, 2017, 02:42:56 pm »

According to my wife, I twitch and start in my sleep often. I suspect I've dealt myself some neurological damage with all the drug abuse. Which would explain the anxiety attack I recently got from smoking weed again for the first time in a long time.
Maybe you're just a newborn puppy developing your nerve tissues.
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Hanslanda

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17716 on: May 09, 2017, 02:46:29 pm »

I suspect it only fucked me up this last time because I have something to lose now. Before I was fearless because the worst that could happen was death and I don't fear death. I respect death and danger and I'd rather die old, but I am not afraid of it. Now I can imagine worse things than death. For example, that last high, I was cooking and suddenly became aware of how inebriated I was and how dangerous the stove was. Not to me, but my family. My lover and our way of life. It was deeply unsettling.
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Well, we could put two and two together and write a book: "The Shit that Hans and Max Did: You Won't Believe This Shit."
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Descan

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17717 on: May 10, 2017, 01:34:41 am »

the obvious answer is to get high again in a psychiatrically controlled setting where you form good associations instead of "o hey i can burn everyone to death"

...

i'm only half joking
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Yoink

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17718 on: May 10, 2017, 04:49:08 am »

I suspect it only fucked me up this last time because I have something to lose now. Before I was fearless because the worst that could happen was death and I don't fear death.
Man, I think I know this feeling, albeit on a smaller scale.
Actually caring about things all of a sudden (as opposed to general, irrational anxiety) is fucking weird.
And yes, LSD is something to be extremely careful with. Ideally one should only take it when one's mind is calm, and free of worries or fears that might be amplified to terrifying proportions. Given my pre-existing anxiety condition I have always been especially cautious. Not really sure what advice would be best for your situation, honestly, especially since everyone is affected differently by such things anyway, but I wish you the best of luck in getting better. Just smash some pingaz to cheer yourself up, she'll be right m8!    


It's still a good idea not to do drugs, though.
Truly, spoken like one who has never taken drugs.   
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Rolan7

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17719 on: May 10, 2017, 11:14:29 am »

I worry about the residual amounts that apparently stick around in your spine, potentially triggering years later.  Bit too permanent for me, no matter how rare or slight.  A shame, though, I hope a safe version gets developed someday.
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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17720 on: May 10, 2017, 11:16:01 am »

"Don't bathe in magma."

"Spoken like someone who has never bathed in magma!"

 ;)
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Hanslanda

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17721 on: May 10, 2017, 11:23:14 am »

It's still a good idea not to do drugs, though.
Truly, spoken like one who has never taken drugs.   


This. I wouldn't trade my drug-times away for anything, because I learned a whole lot more about the true face of the world than I would have without them. I also learned a lot about myself. Particularly the 'calm' thing. I have anxiety now, but when a crisis happens, I'm cold and methodical. I think and act quickly. I don't freeze up in fear, I just do what I need to do to survive. Amongst other lessons, most less pleasing.

I suspect it only fucked me up this last time because I have something to lose now. Before I was fearless because the worst that could happen was death and I don't fear death.
Man, I think I know this feeling, albeit on a smaller scale.
Actually caring about things all of a sudden (as opposed to general, irrational anxiety) is fucking weird.
And yes, LSD is something to be extremely careful with. Ideally one should only take it when one's mind is calm, and free of worries or fears that might be amplified to terrifying proportions. Given my pre-existing anxiety condition I have always been especially cautious. Not really sure what advice would be best for your situation, honestly, especially since everyone is affected differently by such things anyway, but I wish you the best of luck in getting better. Just smash some pingaz to cheer yourself up, she'll be right m8!    


In the time before I quit, I probably did LSD almost 200 different times. I literally spent a year high on it every other day or so. I've taken 11.5 grams of mushrooms and two hits of acid at one time. I've done bath salts, research chemicals, every drug on the list but heroin, meth, and mescaline. I once took 15+ hits of acid at once (not entirely sure how many) and got raided by the cops that day. Didn't have a bad trip, even then. I was seriously the calmest person on earth til about 2 years ago. I will be okay, it's just surprising to me how my brain changed just from falling in love.

I worry about the residual amounts that apparently stick around in your spine, potentially triggering years later.  Bit too permanent for me, no matter how rare or slight.  A shame, though, I hope a safe version gets developed someday.


I've had flashbacks, and they can be disconcerting. (Especially when it happened while being booked into jail for drug court violations, and whilst in rehab, consistently every time I entered on particular room with purple walls. I could see auras and shit in that room.) But they aren't like people make them sound.
« Last Edit: May 10, 2017, 11:25:10 am by Hanslanda »
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Well, we could put two and two together and write a book: "The Shit that Hans and Max Did: You Won't Believe This Shit."
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hops

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17722 on: May 10, 2017, 02:05:27 pm »

Weed Spine
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Yoink

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17723 on: May 16, 2017, 09:31:41 pm »

Earlier, as I walked down the street on a mission to acquire a pie, I was pondering the need to get myself a new wallet, to replace the card folder I lost recently. Of course I wouldn't want a leather one, and I wondered where I might acquire a vegan wallet. At first I considered buying one online, but then the shipping costs and wait involved occurred to me and I figured I'd probably be better off finding one in a store.

I just got home and ate my (delicious) pie whilst doing a bit of idle browsing of the internet, then I logged into Facebook and the first advertisement I notice is for cruelty-free, vegan wallets made from cork. O____O
Get out of my mind, Zuckerberg!
...Although on second thoughts these do look pretty nice. Hmmmm.   
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Booze is Life for Yoink

To deprive him of Drink is to steal divinity from God.
you need to reconsider your life
If there's any cause worth dying for, it's memes.

hops

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17724 on: May 17, 2017, 01:41:49 am »

I thought most leather wallets are synthetic anyways?
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Rolan7

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17725 on: May 17, 2017, 01:52:25 am »

I had a leather wallet in high school, off some flea market, but it started falling apart.  So I bought a polyester one, uh...  nigh 14 years ago? 
It holds my cards and my cash just great
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itisnotlogical

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17726 on: May 17, 2017, 03:17:44 am »

I want one of those metal wallets that's closer to a cigarette case, but I can't find any of those with a chain or spot to attach one (in local shops, haven't tried internet). I always wear a wallet with a chain since my old chainless one slid off my lap in a parking lot, never to be seen again.
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misko27

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17727 on: May 18, 2017, 12:11:08 am »

My tendency to play around with small-to-medium sized objects in my mouth very nearly led me to stab myself in the throat/head/something by accident. It did, in fact, move hard/fast enough to just barely cut the far end of my mouth/throat (something), but was short enough that it stopped there.

Not doing that again.
« Last Edit: May 18, 2017, 12:13:16 am by misko27 »
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George_Chickens

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17728 on: May 18, 2017, 12:52:56 am »

Why the fuck are you putting knives in your mouth
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misko27

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #17729 on: May 18, 2017, 03:34:36 am »

Not knives. I've never been quite that Just... plastic. Plastic can be really sharp when you chew on it, incidentally.
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