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Author Topic: Things that made you absolutely terrified today  (Read 2007220 times)

Tawa

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16620 on: August 15, 2016, 06:44:45 pm »

Welcome, mortal, to your DOOM.
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Rolan7

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16621 on: August 18, 2016, 11:36:13 pm »

Apparently my grandmother is having schizophrenic visions that sound *exactly* like my nightmares (which I've barely had recently, thankfully).  She sees imaginary people...  just staring at her.  In real life.  Apparently she's gotten used to it, and it doesn't bother her anymore.

I hope she's being honest, and they don't grab her when ignored (or scream static when addressed).
She died today.
I probably shouldn't be drinking all this tea after midnight right now, but I really don't want to go to sleep.

Throwing myself into work to avoid thinking about how rarely I saw her this year.  And how I don't actually feel sad yet.
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BorkBorkGoesTheCode

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16622 on: August 18, 2016, 11:40:49 pm »

What are you afraid of?
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Arx

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16623 on: August 18, 2016, 11:46:09 pm »

Deepest condolences, Rol.  Wish I could offer something more.
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BorkBorkGoesTheCode

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16624 on: August 18, 2016, 11:47:16 pm »

Deepest condolences, Rol.  Wish I could offer something more.
Basically this.
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Rolan7

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16625 on: August 18, 2016, 11:56:47 pm »

Thanks, I'll be fine...  I'm facing things head on now so they'll get better.

What are you afraid of?
When I feel particularly guilty (which I already was yesterday, and this is so much worse) it tends to manifest in my dreams as motionless, staring figures.  Sometimes they're me, sometimes they're family members, sometimes they're abstract mannequins.  They never move, just stare.  If I try to ignore them I end up panicking.  If I confront them they start whispering, them screaming inarticulately.

I haven't had any recently, but I was going to sleep tipsy most nights.  Which I'm not doing anymore.

They're especially on my mind because she had something similar - except as waking hallucinations.  Supposedly without the panic and screaming, except that she *was* panicking a lot for no visible reason.

I'm a little spiritual, specifically with regard to fey, so part of me is slightly worried that there could actually be something supernatural here...  But probably not, just mundane guilt-spawned nightmares I'm not looking forward to.
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She/they
No justice: no peace.
Quote from: Fallen London, one Unthinkable Hope
This one didn't want to be who they was. On the Surface – it was a dull, unconsidered sadness. But everything changed. Which implied everything could change.

BorkBorkGoesTheCode

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16626 on: August 19, 2016, 12:03:04 am »

Have you seen a Nightmare?
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Rolan7

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16627 on: August 19, 2016, 12:55:18 am »

I haven't seen any big black horses if that's what you mean :P
Dunno about creatures sitting on my chest as I sleep.  I do sleep a lot better on my side, but there are simple mundane reasons for that.

I mean, that's the thing about "sentient creatures who supernaturally defy scientific observation".  We can't really know anything about them.  (I have a theory that if a fey would leave significant evidence, they instead cease to be.  Literally untestable creatures of the gaps, only existing at the edge of human knowledge.  Playing their games and taking their victims in the remote places where mysteries go unsolved.  Such as the human mind.)

But all that aside, these really don't seem like fey to me.  Just my subconscious trying to make me confront things.
Probably.
Theorycrafting is relaxing, and I got some work done, I really do feel better now.  Ready to sleep.
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She/they
No justice: no peace.
Quote from: Fallen London, one Unthinkable Hope
This one didn't want to be who they was. On the Surface – it was a dull, unconsidered sadness. But everything changed. Which implied everything could change.

Lightningfalcon

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16628 on: August 22, 2016, 09:20:20 am »

We've finally started actually learning assembly in my computer organazation class. What the hell is all of this.
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ChairmanPoo

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16629 on: August 22, 2016, 09:37:47 am »

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Sirus

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SalmonGod

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16631 on: August 24, 2016, 04:43:15 pm »

So... don't know if I'm really terrified or not... but I think I've had my first experience(s) with sleep paralysis.  But I'm not really sure?

About a week ago, I was reminded of the pseudo-documentary about sleep paralysis coincidentally by two different sources on the same day, which I still haven't got around to watching.  Got me thinking about the subject, which I've found interesting since I first learned about it.

I'm not sure if it was that same night or the next... but I woke up in the middle of the night.  I was dreaming.  Nothing extraordinary.  Just a random dream about mundane stuff.  And suddenly realized that even though the dream was still running, I was conscious.  Fully awake.  Dream ended at that point, and I was laying there with my eyes closed awake.  This happens to me once in a while.  Usually, I never even open my eyes.  Just continue to lay there and fall back asleep in a few minutes. 

This time I realized after a couple minutes that my eyes were shut really tight, like my body was bracing for something.  Then suddenly I just knew... I was about to experience sleep paralysis for the first time.  Even though I wasn't experiencing anything, my body was already aware of it, and my conscious mind could tell 100% what was about to happen by observing my body's independent behavior. 

And I was definitely fully conscious.  Thinking clearly.  Didn't feel groggy or anything.  Breathing normally.  No weird sensations.  I began logically analyzing the situation as soon as realization set in, consciously thinking "This is actually really cool!  I'll finally get to see what this stuff is like, and I'm fully aware of what's going on, so it won't be a random terror event like for most people."  I knew that paralysis was part of the experience, so I confirmed I was able to move by wiggling my extremities and shifted my legs a bit... but I didn't want to throw off the experience, so I didn't dare move around too much.  I knew it was strange that I could move.

And then it happened.  That overwhelming sense of an evil presence flew in behind me, with a feeling of tangible pressure and a raspy female voice that just said "Well....." and trailed off.  Not a hag-like voice.  A whispery sinister vocal style similar to Evelynn from League of Legends.  Following the voice was several seconds of what could best be described as dozens of soft bubbles of evil throwing themselves against the back of my neck, accompanied by a deep droning sound.  And that was it.

I laid there for a few more minutes thinking about how cool that was.  Proud of myself that I could calmly lay there and let all that happen without any real fear.  Then got up and walked around for a bit, because I knew I still wouldn't be able to get back to sleep unless I did something to shake off that experience.

Now... every night since then, I have woken up exactly once in the middle of the night.  Every time, I wonder "wait... is it going to happen again?"  And it takes me longer than normal to get back to sleep.

Lastnight, I woke up again... and without any physical cues, I had that sense of certainty that it was going to happen again.  So I laid there, waiting.  Opened my eyes and looked around.  Tossed and turned.  Not sure how long I waited, but it felt like a really long time.  Definitely fully conscious and moving freely.  When something finally happened, it was much different from before.  I was just laying there thinking about mundane unrelated stuff while waiting to either fall back asleep or experience something, and before any feeling of anything began to approach, I noticed my heart rate elevating and breathing getting more intense.  And as this happened, I felt that same presence... but approaching slowly from further away.  I felt like my body's reaction was directly inviting the thing and I did not like the physical panic response that was going on that had not been a feature before.  So I thought, "I'm going to mental discipline the shit out of this and learn to control it."  So I began forcing myself to focus my thoughts on unrelated things (work, family, texture of the blanket, scenes from a show, etc) and slow my heartbeat.  I did this quite successfully, and the sense of presence receded... for a while... but it didn't completely disappear and soon I felt it begin to fight and push harder towards me. 

And thus began what felt like an epic battle of wills with some evil presence trying to force itself on me.  I would re-double my focus on a specific thought and slow my breathing and heartbeat way down... and then I'd get comfortable, and it would take advantage of that drop in guard to force itself towards me even harder.  At a few points, I felt like it was straining and reaching out to lightly touch the back of my neck with its fingers, and it felt like a huge physical effort that had me gushing with sweat to get control of my breathing, heartbeat, and thought focus to push it away again.  This felt like it went on for like half an hour.  And again, I could definitely move, and did so a fair amount through the whole thing... but I didn't dare to open my eyes and turn around to potentially face whatever it was, because I felt like I would lose control of the fight if I did so.  Finally, it faded away.  I got up for a bit again, and it was really hard to get back to sleep.  I never looked at the time, but I feel like I was up for a couple hours.

This is going to kill me if it starts happening every night.  And I'm weirded out that both these experiences really seem like they've happened not when I'm falling asleep or waking up... but when I've been awake for a while and my body is not shut down and paralyzed for sleep.  Need to put something by my bed that I can check the time on, so I can see if my wake-ups are always at the same time.  I feel like they probably are.
« Last Edit: August 24, 2016, 04:47:54 pm by SalmonGod »
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SalmonGod

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16632 on: August 24, 2016, 05:09:30 pm »

Quote
How can you tell the presence is 'evil'? Or is it pure gut feeling?

Like a physical manifestation of sinister intent.  Don't know how else to describe it.  An "evil presence" is how pretty much all accounts of sleep paralysis describe it - The Intruder.  Most accounts describe a sense of impending evil or doom preceding any sensory experience.

Quote
I noticed you compared the voice to something you'd already heard--are there any other parts of the experience that could possibly be related to memories/stories you've heard/etc.?

It's just a game character.  Nothing significant.  Just the closest thing I could compare it, too.  I wanted to describe the thing as vividly as possible, in case I'm not the only person who enjoys reading stuff like this from other people.  I've always felt a natural interest towards both twisted, macabre horror stuff, and understanding how our minds function.  These stories are like a perfect combination of both.  It's like reading a creepypasta, but knowing that someone actually experienced this because of a bizarre quirk in our neurobiology that everyone has.

Quote
Also, in what position do you sleep?

Usually on my side.  I actually do this weird thing where I pull one knee up to my chest and stretch the other leg way out.  That was my position for both these experiences.  I've read that sleep paralysis is far more likely when sleeping on your back.

Quote
If you try to picture the presence in your mind, do you immediately come up with someing or not?

Umm... I've got nothing.  Just a sensation.

Quote
Also, an idea- if you keep waking up at the same time, maybe try setting an alarm an hour beforehand to wake you up, then going back to sleep again and see if you can sleep through the time you woke up.

Nice idea.  I'll keep it in mind.
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In the land of twilight, under the moon
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In the land of twilight

Maybe people should love for the sake of loving, and not with all of these optimization conditions.

Yoink

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16633 on: August 24, 2016, 05:10:41 pm »

Urgh. I need to do some serious diplomacy today.
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BlackHeartKabal

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Re: Things that made you absolutely terrified today
« Reply #16634 on: August 24, 2016, 05:49:28 pm »

Holy shit, I forgot to take my medicine about two nights ago and got literally sleep, just every time I tried to sleep it was a chain of sleep paralysis and forcing myself awake to keep some thing from dragging me away. And then I had an amazingly surreal dream that I can barely remember, something involving a gauntlet of going through every depressing memory in my life, culminating in running through reality itself tearing apart at the seams, and just trying to outrun all of the destruction, and the noises I heard, just, eeh. That was the worst night of my life.
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