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[Flying Dice]

It probably also helps to be driving a two-ton brick of Detroit steel.

[Frumple]

... not if you're actually vaguely aware of wreck statistics, no. Give frumple crumple zones and significant statistical drop in fatalities and debilitating injury. Not actually sure where my own '95 station wagon falls on that spectrum, but it's purple so I don't give a damn.

Though yeah, most people stop being nerve-wracked after a while. I still haven't entirely after... seven years and some change? But at least the shakes have stopped. Usually. Bright side, the chance of falling asleep at the wheel is basically nonexistent.

My first unsupervised drive (and, well, my... third? Total. On the road. With the second being when I got my license, and the first the literal only instruction I ever got.) was around 180 miles through freeway and city traffic, though. Three hour drive. It took... something like four hours before I stopped shaking entirely? Something like that. Wasn't fun, haha!

[Spehss _]

_{^{And traffic isn't awful or the road is not a mess.}}

Wait... that's actually possible?

Sometimes, on highways where it's just a straight drive for a while and the road isn't under construction for the umpteenth time, the planets align juuust right and there isn't a total fustercluck of cars, trucks, and terribad drivers, and the radio is playing good music, it can actually be a nice joyride.

[Frumple]

Best time for that's around three or four in the morning, in my experience. In the right place, you can go five or ten minutes without seeing any other vehicles. It's actually kinda' nice.*

And bugger the radio -- get an MP3 player and a radio hijacker (the latter is even relatively cheap, from what I've seen), if you can't just plug into your machine.

*Until you run over a drive shaft that was in the the road and come about an inch from taking off your lower leg. Then, uh. You drive less at night. And get the hole in the bottom of your car patched.

[Gamerlord]

There's a bushfire about seven minutes away and the next suburb (Golden Grove) over has been put on high alert for possible evacuation.

[Spehss _]

And bugger the radio -- get an MP3 player and a radio hijacker (the latter is even relatively cheap, from what I've seen), if you can't just plug into your machine.

Obviously the output quality of radio depends on your location and the quality of radio stations near your location. Personally I've got 3~4 good ones I can switch between to avoid commercial breaks fairly consistently. If I go somewhere far out where I can't hear those stations, I'd probably use CDs.

[Yoink]

There's a bushfire about seven minutes away and the next suburb (Golden Grove) over has been put on high alert for possible evacuation.

Stay safe, dude.
I'm assuming you have steps to take in bushfire-related emergencies, and you most likely know far more about such things than I do, but be careful.

[GiglameshDespair]

Wrap yourself in asbestos and be safe from fire forever.

[smeeprocket]

I can't even drive. Last time I tried I almost drove off a bridge. I have failed the test twice and eventually just gave up. Too much of a fear driver with tunnel vision.

[Sirus]

I should become a chauffeur and cart around forumites who can't drive for a living :v

[IcyTea31]

Should you brave up and decide to keep trying, here's some tips, smeeprocket: your eyes and brains are for observation, not for driving. Try driving with your eyes closed (in an open lot so nobody gets hurt). Get a feel of the car, drive with your spine and muscle memory. Once you can do that, open your eyes to look at the road, other road users, traffic signs, speedometer, etc., and think about those and what you should do about them. You also don't have to drive any faster than you dare, so slow down if it's still too hard.

Basically, the cliché Zen phrase, adapted: don't think. Drive.

[smeeprocket]

That's what my personal manservant... er boyfriend, is for.

I tried to learn to drive for awhile, but my tunnel vision hearkens back from being picked on in elementary school (if I noticed it I was going to say something, so my brain just started blocking it out.) It's not something I can easily get rid of, my situational awareness is awful.

[SalmonGod]

Driving is really just a matter of knowing the rules and controlling your speed.  That's it.  Barring very bad weather or other drivers not following rules, you will be safe.  You're just a little blip of data running along a bunch of wires according to algorithmically pre-determined protocols.  Follow the algorithm, and everything works like it's supposed to.  And those rules really aren't that complicated.  Card games get 1000x more complicated.

[Orange Wizard]

Having a car and being able to drive it is an essential skill here in NZ, because our public transport system is unbelievably shit.
This means that there are loads of idiots on the road (most of them cyclists) and driving is one of the most dangerous things you can do here.

[Graknorke]

Spoiler: first one is my favorite (click to show/hide)

Fuck it, it's going straight here. I'm not even going to reply to it on any other thread. Because this is where it belongs.