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[Darvi]

Also give it twenny bucks.

[Graknorke]

I think it was a prank.

Any advice for dealing with Slenderman/Annoying pranksters/Serial killers?

Keep a camera of you at all times or maybe don't have a camera I'm not sure if it's a good or bad thing but having a camera definitely changes something/counter-prank and one-up them/hope that you don't fit their MO.

[Loud Whispers]

It was actually yesterday, but it was my first day sleeping up in the mountains, and I had to find my way back to the cabin at 10 PM, with nothing but a iPhone for a flashlight, and no warm clothes at all. Now, I'm not scared of the dark, but this is like horror movie dark out. Also, I found one of the pages from Slender taped to my door.

Find who did it and plaster the wall with posters of Agent Smith, naked.

[Orange Wizard]

It was actually yesterday, but it was my first day sleeping up in the mountains, and I had to find my way back to the cabin at 10 PM, with nothing but a iPhone for a flashlight, and no warm clothes at all. Now, I'm not scared of the dark, but this is like horror movie dark out. Also, I found one of the pages from Slender taped to my door.

Find who did it and plaster the wall with posters of Agent Smith, naked.

Is there any problem Naked Agent Smith can't solve?

[MaximumZero]

Any advice for dealing with Slenderman/Annoying pranksters/Serial killers?

Punch them in the face. Hard. Slenderman turns into Benderman if you hit him hard enough.

[Mech#4]

Any advice for dealing with Slenderman/Annoying pranksters/Serial killers?

Punch them in the face. Hard. Slenderman turns into Benderman if you hit him hard enough.

Poor guy. He only just got on the wagon too.

[Loud Whispers]

It was actually yesterday, but it was my first day sleeping up in the mountains, and I had to find my way back to the cabin at 10 PM, with nothing but a iPhone for a flashlight, and no warm clothes at all. Now, I'm not scared of the dark, but this is like horror movie dark out. Also, I found one of the pages from Slender taped to my door.

Find who did it and plaster the wall with posters of Agent Smith, naked.

Is there any problem Naked Agent Smith can't solve?

World hunger? I suppose you could replace money with naked agent Smith and buy food with it but that might be cheating.

[Playergamer]

Now then, the last couple of days have been mostly fine, but I've got a whole new terrified.

Google has won.

Google stood up to China. A large amount of the US Governments information is stored on Google databases, and Google is paid for this. Google has every account on the internet, thanks to password and username reuse. Google can buy out billion dollar businesses that even slightly compete with them. If it weren't for the people at Twitch taking a billion dollar offer from Google, I'd probably be back to browsing the internet, not even considering this.

This isn't me going "Wake up, sheeple!" I'm just saying that the whole "world ruled by mega corporations" setting might not be as far off as we thought.

Now, can someone please reassure me about this not being as bad as I think?

[Xantalos]

They're too big to give a shit beyond what they're obligated to.

[~Neri]

It's google, all I need to do is seduce one of the higher ups and I'm safe.

[Eric Blank]

Uh... They probably won't sell your information to someone who will use it to steal your money. Probably.

[Worldmaster27]

Now then, the last couple of days have been mostly fine, but I've got a whole new terrified.

Google has won.

Google stood up to China. A large amount of the US Governments information is stored on Google databases, and Google is paid for this. Google has every account on the internet, thanks to password and username reuse. Google can buy out billion dollar businesses that even slightly compete with them. If it weren't for the people at Twitch taking a billion dollar offer from Google, I'd probably be back to browsing the internet, not even considering this.

This isn't me going "Wake up, sheeple!" I'm just saying that the whole "world ruled by mega corporations" setting might not be as far off as we thought.

Now, can someone please reassure me about this not being as bad as I think?

Do not worry. It is not as bad as you think. Your fears are unfounded. Please report to the nearest Google Thought Reassignment^tm station so that you may once again be a happy and productive citizen of this great Google.

It's google, all I need to do is seduce one of the higher ups and I'm safe.

Google Estimates^tm says that this is 99 percent true.

[Lightningfalcon]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[Yoink]

I'm just saying that the whole "world ruled by mega corporations" setting might not be as far off as we thought.

So, uh... the present isn't as far off as we thought? Good to know.

[Playergamer]

Yoink, I mean when the countries stop being puppets and come out about it.

As for the xkcd comic, yes, that's a great one, that got a lot of laughs out of me. On an unrelated note, right after I put that post up, my Paypal account was emptied. I'm sure it's nothing!

PS: Let's be serious here. My reliable, never failed me before internet failed seconds after I put this up. Call me paranoid, but...

PPS: If I don't post within 24 hours, you know what happened. Again, probably paranoid, but...