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[MetalSlimeHunt]

Sexocracy: You have two cows. The government orders-OHGODOHGODNOONONONNONONNNOTGOINGTHERE!!!!!!! BAD METAPHOR IS BAD! VERY, VERY BAD!

[Askot Bokbondeler]

what? that you indulge in acts of bestiality? sounds like an utopy 

[Argembarger]

Sexocracy: You have two cows. The government orders-OHGODOHGODNOONONONNONONNNOTGOINGTHERE!!!!!!! BAD METAPHOR IS BAD! VERY, VERY BAD!

I'd be pretty impressed if this was gonna be even worse than my Lolita implications earlier

[MetalSlimeHunt]

I think I traumatized myself there. *cries in dark corner* Why, Mind? Why do you do these things to me!?

[Argembarger]

Candlejackocracy: You have two co

[Aklyon]

Sexocracy: You sell 1 cow, buy 1 bull, and leave the bovines alone.

[Askot Bokbondeler]

...those sweet, tender thighs ...the irresistible appeal of an udder

[MetalSlimeHunt]

EMPEROCRACY: All Hail The God-Emperor of Mankind! Crush the Xeno Cow Filth! Burn The Heritic Cows!  Shoot the Traitor Cows! Extermanatus All The Cows!

[fqllve]

Surrealism - you have (are) two giraffes. the two giraffes who are you who are giraffes begin to melt. their skin slops off into milk on the ground.

[Aklyon]

DUNEOCRACY: You kill the cows, then use the money from selling their water to become Rich with spice mining.

[mainiac]

Dictatorial Meritocracy: You have two cows.  You shoot the one with less milk.

Benevolent Meritocracy: You have two cows.  You are given an award for having twice as many cows as your neighbor, then his cow is given to you.

Irish Traditional Government: You have two cows.  Your neighbor steals your cows and declares himself king.  You steal his cows and declare yourself king.  You other neighbor steal all the cows in the neighborhood and declares himself high king.  The first king steals the high kings cows and now he's high king.  Then you and the previous high king steal the new high king's herd and split it between you two just in time for the king across the river to show up and...

Latin Traditional Government: You have two cows and no women.  You barbecue one cow and invite the next door family over for diner then date rape their daughter.

Democracy (in action): You have two cows.  Everybody has one vote.  You don't vote.  You now have one cow.

[Aqizzar]

MERCANTILISM: Home Country - You have two cows.  The government taxes your sale of the milk, to fund the Colonial Marines.

MERCANTILISM: Colonial Edition - You have two cows.  The Colonial Marines shoot them.

MAFIAISM - You have two cows.  One cow gets sick.  You fail to pay your neighborhood protection.  You now have one healthy cow, one sick cow, and two broken legs.

GECKOISM - You have two cows.  Your broker convinces you to buy into a larger farm network.  The incorporated farm turns out to be massively short on cows and long on debts, right as the network's president and your broker disappear.  The FCC promises to get right on finding out what happened, ten to twenty years from now.

OTHER MAFIAISM - Two people in the room are cows.  You don't know who they are.  They might even be you.

IMPERIUMISM - You have two groxes.  Milking them is an arduous affair worthy of legend.  But not nearly as arduous as all these crappy cybernetic limbs, that really threatening guy with the pistol, and the robotic space zombies you've been conscripted to fight.  The groxes are a pretty small affair, really.

The more I learn about feudalism, the better it sounds. This is remarkable, since the opposite is true of every other system of government or economical theory.

I keep saying these things, and nobody ever listens to me.

[Realmfighter]

DICTATORSHIP - Best Korea - You have two cows.  The Government straps rockets onto one, the other being fitted with a launcher platform. You get shot for having cows.

[inteuniso]

Conspiracracy-You have two cows. Overnight, one of your cows was taken by the Government. Or maybe it was the Russians? Or the Mafia? Or terrorists? Maybe even Aliens! OH GOD THEY'RE COMING FOR ME

[Aklyon]

Conspiracracy-You have two cows. Overnight, one of your cows was taken by the Government. Or maybe it was the Russians? Or the Mafia? Or terrorists? Maybe even Aliens! OH GOD THEY'RE COMING FOR ME

It was the other cow! Shoot it before it steals the barn away too!