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[Toriad]

FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all of the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need.

BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and put them in a barn with everyone else's cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs as the regulations say you need.

FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them and sells you the milk.

PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.

RUSSIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.

CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The government takes both of them and shoots you.

DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.

PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.

REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.

BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

PURE ANARCHY: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.

LIBERTARIAN/ANARCHO-CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

DWARFISM: You have two cows. One drowns, the other boils in magma.

[Aklyon]

I vote for surrealism.

[Toriad]

Gotta love giraffes and harmonica lessons. Especially if the government forces you to take them 

[Creamcorn]

This is genius. If you came up with it, you are a damn genius.

Or in surrealism.

That are peanuts? He me built above as well they; he it the hoover melons!

[Argembarger]

Feudalism doesn't sound too bad at all here

I've read similarly formatted things, like one that described governments and worldviews based on how they view a "glass half full".

[Frajic]

This is genius. If you came up with it, you are a damn genius.

Or in surrealism.

That are peanuts? He me built above as well they; he it the hoover melons!

[insert chef brian pic here]

[Eugenitor]

Dwarfism: You have two cows. One drowns, the other boils in magma.

[Soadreqm]

The more I learn about feudalism, the better it sounds. This is remarkable, since the opposite is true of every other system of government or economical theory.

[AntiAntiMatter]

Absolutely brilliant.

[Toriad]

Dwarfism: You have two cows. One drowns, the other boils in magma.

Tis a good one, i'll add it!

[Askot Bokbondeler]

The more I learn about feudalism, the better it sounds. This is remarkable, since the opposite is true of every other system of government or economical theory.

if reading a humorous line on a joke about political ideologies counts as learning... let me teach you something then, in a religious fundamentalism you have two cows, god takes them from you and gives you fifty virgins and eternal bliss

[Leafsnail]

Feudalism also implies you're a slave to the lord though, heh.

I think there was one which ran something like: "Apathy: You have two cows.  Who cares?"

[Heron TSG]

This is astoundingly similar to a poster in my old U.S. History teacher's classroom, not to rain on your parade. The surrealism one is both new and hilarious, though.

[Eugenitor]

POST-SCARCITY: You have an enormous complex full of cows. The taking care of is mostly done by machines. There's enough milk for everybody.

[Eugenitor]

This is astoundingly similar to a poster in my old U.S. History teacher's classroom

It's really old copypasta.