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[Mathel]

The verdict is in! Four missions, six dead hands, a hefty loan from the future bank, and all the air explosively leaving my lungs in exasperation later, and i've learned this game isn't meant for mobile

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

X-Piratez. UFO might be slightly playable on android, but not having the ability to see the research tree (or enemy loadouts, or control my units efficiently) really fucked me over. Especially since, apparently, when I started playing the version on my desktop out of idle curiosity a few months ago, I din't realize it was a few years out of date.

Having bluetooth mouse and keyboard is really useful.

My deaths:
Died several times on the "maze" puzzles. They are timed and that makes me try to rush them.

Medieval cop: "How the Grump Stole Christmass!"

[Telgin]

And I had just learned that you can feed horses apples directly from your hand too.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Breath of the Wild. According to Malanya when I went to revive the horse, they died "bravely fighting a Guardian. A good death."

I don't think I've managed to get a horse killed yet, but mostly because I always run everywhere because I'm afraid I'll get a horse killed...

Anyway, last night I was stalking a moblin on a bridge when I died by randomly exploding and flying off into electrified water at the base of the tower that rose in the middle of the monster encampment.  After I respawned, I realized that a bokoblin had throw an explosive barrel at me from even higher up on the improvised tower than I was.  I only regret that I killed him by stabbing him a few times instead of setting him on fire with the fire rod I got from the wizzrobe right below him.

[nenjin]

Whole team has to defend a door while the C.A.T opens it. The last objective before we win the map.

They all die, right as the 2nd Broodlord shows up.

They shout at me to back myself into a tiny corner by the door, so the Broodlord can't get to me.

But everything else can.

Cue me shooting my Redepemption Bolter point blank into a horde of genestealers and hybrids. I manage to nuke several psykers and mow down dozens of other xenoforms before they take my gun arm.

I continue to punch with my power fist, and blast Warp Lightning, Combustion and Shockwave as soon as they're off cooldown, barely keeping everything at bay.

The door has seconds left before it opens.

Then ONE genestealer comes in and just starts blocking all my attacks. With no room to move, I don't have any space to back up and force him to move and therefore stop his blocking. He blocks once, twice, three times, four times, five times....then finally counterattacks and kills me. As my corpse slumps to the ground I watch the doors start to slide open.

The cries of my disappointed teammates are almost enough to drown out the shrieking genestealers doing a victory dance over my corpse.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Space Hulk: Deathwing

[Sirus]

How in space does one block a power fist? Aren't they supposed to be able to punch through tank armor?

[nenjin]

Yeah, it should be completely impossible for them to do that. But it's a game with game logic, and the logic is "there has to be something to prevent the player from just fisting their way through the game." So chitin gets to withstand multiple power fist strikes.

Ironically when you block a genestealer with your forearm, which is the arm that carries the power fist, you take damage to that arm, and eventually lose it. So I guess chitin is the true future material of 40k, forget ceramite.

To be fair though, on the highest difficulty they've dialed the challenge up to 11. You can shoot off half a genestealer's face and a couple of his arms and drop him to the floor....and the sonsofbitches will get BACK UP when you've turned your back to kill you with their remaining arms. Which is why when a genestealer goes down, I usually shoot them 4 or 5 more times until I see their corpse rag-dolling.

It plays very differently than Vermintide 2, but damn me if it's not fun and intense all the same. Just at a very different pace.

[Imic]

I was trying to find out who murdered a family in an area where people kept murdering each other because crime or something, and then my Internet started to fuck, the people I was eavesdropping froze, and ten minutes later, once the game de-freez-ifies I was very dead.
WoW

[MCreeper]

Noticed that there is a bunch of people playing X-piratez and decided to give it a try. In 3 work days of feverish grinding playing (and i don't remember how much in-game time, it's july 26 now), there were two moments that very much reminded me of one funny song:
"Trust me, i'm an engineer
What the hell just happened there!?
Trust me, i'm an engineer
And i'm getting out of here!"

1. Someone landed nearby, so of course i attacked them. Coming out of the bus to see a guy in black armor standing with his back to me. He then proceeds to seemingly no-sell all the bullets. First enemy to survive full old shotgun blast to the back! Okaaay... end turn. Guy turns around and mows down two gals. Savescummed.
Try two. Managed to stun him and see who it is. Government enforcer? Whoopsie, i'm not actually supposed to kill those. Anyways, i'm taking him to base for research. And his gun. Oh god, the gun! *Swiftly noped to death by three more* Okay, go your way, i'm out!
2. Yet another "scientific experiments" mission. The one that is "deal with cryssalid breakout", not "beat up and enslave some scientist girls", as it turned out. And, as it turned out, that single cryssalid needs to be shot by whole squad of 5, preferrably in the back, to be killed. And you need to kill him three times in a row (is this vanilla?), or else he will get back up properly snd murderbone everyone. Oh, and there are also zombies, which are just a bit less tough, have near-zero sight range, and there are a lot of them. And they may or may not also get back up when you are close. And you can't make a check with shotgun blast to the head before they do. Which is the reason i didn't killed off the last ones in a lab (not counting the fact that zombies in cramped spaces is nonono) on my last savescum attempt and just made off with unconscious zombie, zombie corpse and cryssalid corpse. And didn't even get any research from that. Damn.

Just random things.
1. Second attack on my base, this time dogs, bigger dogs and ratmen with incendiary\chem ammo. And since almost everyone who is going on missions is wounded, i got to defend with three peasants, one swabbie and one proper lokk narr soldier with tommy gun. Former inevitably died, but the latter (after multiple savescums) survived and managed to kill all ratmen in 50 damn turns, thus getting quite a list of titles.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

2. Mutant pogrom mission (it's mid-august already). I wonder if i would get better score if i skipped it altogether. Looted a lot of money and a flamethrower, though. And flamethrower made one of original 6(?) drop her weapon and run around screaming in one shot, so that's something.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

3. At first, i have thought "why shotguns are so precise?". Then "well, 116% chance of hitting is probably for a single pellet". Then "those things are broken". Because, while having 116% chance to hit the enemy on the adjacent tile they still miss left and right. As in, turn to the left, shoot squadmate in the face, turn to the right, do the same thing. Even funnier with minigun (rotagun). And i have thought that arse-shooting was new X-COM's unique feature, and old UFO have no such thing.
4. This picture is just amazing. I wonder where author got it. 

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[Rolan7]

Yeee glad you're enjoying it!
The picture's art seems really familiar but I can't quite place it.

In general the game is sooo much harder than I remembered, even starting out, but a couple specific pieces of advice I can offer:

Shotguns really are extremely deadly at close range, unless the enemy has enough armor to tank each of the pellets.  Firing at *literally melee range* usually doesn't work, though, the enemy gets an "evasion" roll which causes the shooter to aim completely at random.  It's kinda hilarious, but also tactically useful - If you get a gal next to an enemy, and the gal has some energy left, the enemy basically can't shoot without moving.  And the AI generally responds by spending the turn moving (not moving away then shooting, which is the correct response).

As for shooting the military police in the back, one of the most frustrating things in any X-COM is shooting someone in the back only for them to turn around and kill your character.  It's particularly common in X-Piratez since some enemies have a *lot* of armor, the countering of which is... complicated midgame stuff.  But just in case it was the first turn of combat:  Generally you don't actually want to leave the ship on the first turn.  All the enemies have full TU for reaction-fire.  Doing so during the daytime particularly can lead to a very bad day, as enemies across the map are effectively camping your door.

Zombies are fricken tanks, no joke.  Other mission types (like the watchtower) can semi-rarely be zombies instead, as you found.  IIRC they don't have exceptional armor though, just a crapton of HP.
There's one or more zombie type that explodes in poisonous gas on death, though.  I savescummed a first-month watchtower yesterday after I managed to bring one down with some melee gals X_X

I guess the last savescum was when my 4-gal undersea adventure was interrupted by three sharkmen.  After reloading the utter party-wipe, I took one down and skedaddled with the corpse
X-Piratez

[GiglameshDespair]

When I did the first mutant pogrom, I took down the black-armoured Military Police (I think that was their names?) pretty well using the sledgehammer. A decent melee girl seemed to one-shot them, and the benefits of a sledge is that you can bust down the wall next to them, step out, wallop them and the risk to your gal in minimal.

Explosives and molotovs also seemed to work pretty decently. If they panic and drop their gun they're mostly harmless then even if they don't burn to death.

[MCreeper]

Are "govt. enforcers" and "Military police" actually the same thing? Anyways, didn't have trouble killing the latter when i first met them, since i got domestic shotguns and stuff at this point. Met the former muuuch earlier.

As for shooting the military police in the back, one of the most frustrating things in any X-COM is shooting someone in the back only for them to turn around and kill your character.  It's particularly common in X-Piratez since some enemies have a *lot* of armor, the countering of which is... complicated midgame stuff.  But just in case it was the first turn of combat:  Generally you don't actually want to leave the ship on the first turn.  All the enemies have full TU for reaction-fire.  Doing so during the daytime particularly can lead to a very bad day, as enemies across the map are effectively camping your door.

Not the first turn, and he did turn around on his.

Shotguns really are extremely deadly at close range, unless the enemy has enough armor to tank each of the pellets.  Firing at *literally melee range* usually doesn't work, though, the enemy gets an "evasion" roll which causes the shooter to aim completely at random.  It's kinda hilarious, but also tactically useful - If you get a gal next to an enemy, and the gal has some energy left, the enemy basically can't shoot without moving.  And the AI generally responds by spending the turn moving (not moving away then shooting, which is the correct response).
X-Piratez

I beginned to suspect that shooting in melee is useless, but now i have confirmation. 

[ggamer]

That explains a lot! I was wondering why people were matrix dodging point blank bullets...

E: Didn't learn my lesson the first time! Another new game led to a flawless first "gank the nurses" mission, followed by... okay, who the fuck are these dang bloodborne dudes? What felt like about a dozen hits with a baseball bat and a handle from two gals double teaming fucking Gerhman let me knock one guy out, and a molly and two (!!!!!) full hits with a shotgun brought down the second. Unfortunately, my parrot died, so one of my gals understandably went insane for three consecutive turns, followed by Djura and his best buddy 360 no scoping two of my gals with muskets from the opposite end of the map. Not being able to figure out beforehand if i'm going to be fighting the car town dudes from mad max or the fucking healing church really throws me off 

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

x-piratez, obviously

[Robsoie]

I like that at melee range the auto evasion can make ranged weapons accuracy become very random, it makes melee weaponry fun and worth using.

About the mutant pogroms, you are not forced to do them (unlike the terror missions in old xcom that would destroy your score if you skipped them) as long as you have NOT researched the mutant alliance, in which case you must do those pogroms mission or be very sorry for the monthly score.

Oh and once you can always carry grenades on your Gals, super helpful against those ostron troopers when your shotguns aren't hurting them due to their high armor or you're too far to hope to reach them for some melee strike, those guys carry damaging weapons so better make sure you can kill them fast (and grenade are good for them )

[Akura]

I don't know what happens, but after a certain point the Heroes drop a group into my dungeon that completely erases whatever forces I have within seconds, regardless of my army's levels and composition. And it's not even a group of top-tier Heroes. I think only one of them was a T3 unit, the rest were T1-T2s. Even Crowley was wiped out in less than three seconds. And most of my troops were decently high levels - Crowley was at least level 8.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Dungeons 3.

[Rince Wind]

Melee dodge is basically the opponent wrestling for the gun barrel to point it another way.

Gov Enforcers and Military Police are not the same thing, but even the latter are hard so bring down with buckshot. Lots od projectile with low to decent damage each is great against lightly armored foes, but completly useless if they can't penetrate the armor.

Also look at the downed enemies. zzzz stands for sleeping enemies and unless they also took hitpoint damage they might wake up again. (really depending on the enemy in question how much HP damage is needed). If it is a ghost symbol that enemy (or gal) is dying from overstun. Blood drops mean they have a fatal injury.

Also remember that you can always run, nobody cares. You are pirates, not some paramilitary force trying to save the world at all costs. It is too late for that. 

Even after you are allied with the mutant alliance you can always look at the info for pogroms, some are still not mandatory.

[Mathel]

You forgot to mention that flame over fallen creature indicates it burning. I do not remember if it has higher or lower priority than bleeding though.

The mandatory pogroms helpfuly tell you in description how much points you will lose if you ignore them. That is how you can tell them apart.