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[Trapezohedron]

No matter how lucrative the item across you appears, if there's a sign saying that there's a trap ahead, and you see that there is indeed a trap ahead with a very ominous name, NEVER take a step forward to see if you can get that item.

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Dungeons of Dredmor: Conquest of The Wizardlands

[Mephisto]

"An army is gathering outside our city! Plz save us heroes!"

Eh, sure.

Then I find out that the army is made up of one large (possibly undead) war dragon and six groups of various eldritch horrors. In total, there are at least fifteen enemies. I'm Battle Rank 10. My active party can only have up to nine people.

Yeah, I died. In possibly the most insulting manner. The dragon hit my main party for ~1400 HP, leaving me at 30 (for scale, I later found that the dragon has ~77000 HP). Then this axe-bird thing pecks me for a pitiful amount, taking that group out. After that, it's a war of attrition with my only other group quickly getting dispatched.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

The Last Remnant

It's partly my fault - the quest giver gave multiple indications that it would be tough and we might not be up for it and gave several chances to back out.

Luckily, this is a Square game. As long as I'm not actively participating in the quest, they will kindly wait until I get to a high enough rank to curbstomp their asses.

[Lightningfalcon]

Kat.  Tip of the Spear.  Rocket Hog.

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Halo Reach.

[Mr Space Cat]

Kat.  Tip of the Spear.  Rocket Hog.

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Halo Reach.

Oh man, I remember that. "Pick your poison: have Kat drive or have Kat shoot rawkets in the vague direction of everything that moves."

[Lightningfalcon]

Kat.  Tip of the Spear.  Rocket Hog.

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Halo Reach.

Oh man, I remember that. "Pick your poison: have Kat drive or have Kat shoot rawkets in the vague direction of everything that moves."

I was killed both ways.  Have the explosion from Kat's inept firing skills tip you over the edge, AND have Kat drove right over the edge.  It is so, so clear how Spartans were abducted before they were old enough to get a driver's license. 

[Akura]

Not dead, but probably getting there. Thanks to a combination of Weak Stomach and toilet water, I'm vomiting up pretty much my entire food and (toilet) water supply. It's late at night and I can't see well enough to hunt, and have little material to start a fire to cook with.

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Cataclysm: Dark Days Ahead.

NEVER drink unpurified water.  It never ends up well.  Wait until the next day, and then get something.

Figures. I go outside of my nice, safe church with a flashlight to get a hammer from my truck in order to disassemble one of the pews for firewood(more efficiently than smashing) so I can purify some toilet water, and I get torn apart by a wolf spider. My longbow, it does nothing.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Cataclyms again.

[Lightningfalcon]

Not dead, but probably getting there. Thanks to a combination of Weak Stomach and toilet water, I'm vomiting up pretty much my entire food and (toilet) water supply. It's late at night and I can't see well enough to hunt, and have little material to start a fire to cook with.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Cataclysm: Dark Days Ahead.

NEVER drink unpurified water.  It never ends up well.  Wait until the next day, and then get something.

Figures. I go outside of my nice, safe church with a flashlight to get a hammer from my truck in order to disassemble one of the pews for firewood(more efficiently than smashing) so I can purify some toilet water, and I get torn apart by a wolf spider. My longbow, it does nothing.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Cataclyms again.

I think I've posted a few times here are about wolf spiders and longbows, so I feel your pain.  The solution is gunpowder.  Only time I use it. 

[pisskop]

Shaka decided that Arabia and the path to Austrailia would look better yellow.   He and Ghengis and Loius and Mao and Monti and Catherine and Julius and that traitorous Isabella declared at once.   Asmy neighbors,  they shredded me for my iron., which I had 4 of.   Several gems and copper too.

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CIV on my modified Earth map.  Randomly generated but has distinct regions.

[Greiger]

Decided to see how far I could get without my lawnmower.  So I eject at the first ramp, hopping my fat ass out while mid jump.

I manage to catch an airborne wrecking ball at just the right angle to not kill me while flinging me farward at high speed.  I fly over one building and decide to tuck into a ball when I think I'm near the ground.

I land safely .patrially thanks to the now horribly maimed old man I landed on, and manage to roll forward a bit farther thanks to some boosters and come to rest at the base of a wooden ramp with only a few crossbow wounds to show for the ordeal.  Awesome distance and I lived!

Then of course my lawnmower caught up to me, doing a very unfortunate riderless wheelie and I get caught in the cutting blades as it tries to fly by at 70mph.  I'm having a very bad time as my back and legs are slowly being puree'd.  Then the combine from the start of the level mercifully catches up, reducing the ramp, my lawnmower, and me into nothing but bloody gibs.

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Happy Wheels  The Combine v2.1

[itisnotlogical]

In the final moments of the Shipyard level, Rainbow is tasked to run a gauntlet of terrorists lying in ambush to reach a ticking time bomb with only a minute and thirty seconds to spare (the timer doesn't start until you reach a certain point in the level after you get the objective, but whatever).

Chucking grenades and dropping foes like nobody's business, the team finally makes it to the final room despite the loss of Eddie Price to a machine gun-toting tango. After an intense dash for cover followed by a brief and lethal firefight, three Rainbow team members stand victorious.

I completely blanked about what I had come there to do. I heard the beeps, saw the timer at ten seconds and realized that something was nearby, but the dots weren't connecting in my head. When I finally remembered the bomb, I only had six seconds left to deactivate it. I ran up to it and started disarming it. I wasn't even halfway done when it exploded, killing myself and all members of my team instantly.

Rainbow Six 3 on Xbox. The explosion was actually pretty neat since RS3 has extremely solid ragdoll physics, probably tied for the best I've seen with DE:HR. It's a shame that the underlying game is relatively bland in single player.

[Satarus]

Drop podded onto an enemy Vanguard Main Battle Tank.  I drop my tank mines and pull out my pistol to quickly shoot them before the tank drives off.  Good news is that I blew up the tank.

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Planetside 2

[gigaraptor487]

Torn Limb from limb by a Bear, my Nail Board lodged in it and my MAC-10 out of ammo

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Cataclysm: Dark Days Ahead

[Rolan7]

Needed to climb a fairly far-off radio tower.  Found a hanglider lying unattended with a good view of said tower.

To be fair, I did reach the top.  At high velocity.

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Far Cry 3.  After playing through Blood Dragon *twice*, I finally gave in and bought it yesterday.  6 in-game hours later and no regrets at all!

[itisnotlogical]

The Krakeren dreadnought USS Stuart exploded as soon as it entered combat because I messed up the code that checks for health. Instead of checking self.shipType.health like it should, I had accidentally left it as self.health from last week's attempt to define the various class objects. self.health was last hard-coded to 0 for checking the game-over code, thus the Stuart went kablooey.

shipgame.py, coming eventually to my Google Drive where it will collect dust because compiling Python for use on computers that don't have IDLE installed is a pain in the butt and I always procrastinate on doing it.

[Tidal]

Killed by a fed Jax thanks to my team feeding him enough to get ridiculously tanky.

Every fight, he would just do nothing but jump on my face and slap it with a lamppost. He wasn't building damage but dang was he tough to take down.

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League of Legends