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[Culise]

Someone had entirely too much fun designing the new zombie elite grenadiers since the last time I properly played this game a year or three back.  Manhacks are nasty.  Manhacks that hand-deliver flashbangs to your position are extra-nasty.  Manhacks that hand-deliver flashbangs to your position, then follow up with high-yield explosives while you're blinded and stumbling about are just not kosher.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Cataclysm: DDA

[Kagus]

Jesus Christ this game hates me.

I wandered into and O'Driscoll camp, and since O'Driscolls are all a bunch of no-good bastards I took them out. Not a big challenge, but I missed a couple shots due to them running behind some bullet-repellent canvas.

Then while I was looting their camp, a couple more O'Driscolls showed up and started shooting at me. I managed to take them out despite having been ambushed, but one shot flew high over the one dude's head and sailed over a nearby road.

WITNESS: Disturbing the Peace


Apparently someone was close enough to hear that shot, and decided to run back to town and tell everyone about the crazy person firing off shots in the middle of goddamn nowhere and killing off violent gang members. The cur!

Sure enough, a couple lawmen came snooping around trying to find out what kind of reckless maniac would fire off a shot in the hunting grounds more than a mile outside of town. Not wanting to get in trouble with the law, I left the camp and waited for them to conclude their investigation before going back to looting once the coast was clear.

Ah, finally! I could open up the lockbox and get that delicious can of beans they'd hidden away from me! I was just availing myself of their fire to cook a little meat when I heard a shout.

I was suddenly standing in the middle of a full posse of eight lawmen, who had appapparently spawned out of thin air.

They started shooting, I started running... But there were too many of them and they had horses, while I was on foot. I turned to fight, and just barely manage to take them down, with the help of two potent health tonics keeping me upright while surrounded and without any cover. Phew, at least that was over with...

Bounty: $130

Shit. The ghost of one of the dead lawmen had clearly lodged a formal haunting about my misdeeds in defending myself from death. That's more than 25% of my total stash at this point, and I don't feel like it was particularly deserved.

I headed into town and sold off a couple pelts while trying to wrap my head around paying off the bounty... I hopped into the saloon for some whiskey to refresh my cores, and I noticed the grizzled old asshole trapper dude sitting at one of the tables and calling everyone pathetic. Now, I'd heard from someone that you can get a cool hat by beating him up, but I wanted to finish my drink first before throwing knuckles.

While drinking, some random fop shows up and starts talking to my ass about the town's "curse" and what that's supposed to mean.  I try and give him a polite "that's nice dear", but apparently you can't talk while drinking whiskey. So I just stared at him for a bit, trying to see if the conversation prompt would light up once he was properly "finished".

"Hey, what're you staring at, buddy? You tryna start something?"

No, I was not trying to start something, but I couldn't get my words in order to tell him as much, so I just averted my gaze and went back to staring into the liquor.

Motherfucker blindsides me with a fist full of angry impotence. Oh it's on, bitch.

I press the melee button to swing a return strike and show him what a hand is supposed to taste like, but apparently the look in my eyes freaked him out a bit because he immediately turned around to reposition himself.

Y'know what happens when you press the melee button when standing directly behind someone? You perform an uninterruptible stealth kill.

When I got control of myself again, there was a dead fop on the ground, total chaos in the saloon, and someone running out the door to tell the sheriff about how I brutally murdered yet another innocent bystander. Then the mountain man stood up and started fighting with me, because he didn't want to miss out on a fistfight in his saloon.

Then the cops showed up and shot me to death while Ol' Jebediah Tyson was helping me floss by removing my teeth.

Bounty: $145

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Red Dead Redemption 2

[Nighthawk]

Someone had entirely too much fun designing the new zombie elite grenadiers since the last time I properly played this game a year or three back.  Manhacks are nasty.  Manhacks that hand-deliver flashbangs to your position are extra-nasty.  Manhacks that hand-deliver flashbangs to your position, then follow up with high-yield explosives while you're blinded and stumbling about are just not kosher.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Cataclysm: DDA

You're doing better than me. It had been a couple of years-ish since I booted up the game, and I can't even figure out how to access a lonely edge-of-city building without running into a shocker hulk and two-dozen other things that could easily tear me in half. If you have any advice for early game I'll happily take it.

[Steelmagic]

After a long, brutal war in America, Fengtian stabbed me in the back. While the war isn't going to go well for them on account of the fact that I am absolutely fucking loaded with factories and can make whatever I want now, their 8 ships are somehow avoiding the entire IJN, while still managing to intercept and destroy 23 divisions in transit.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Hearts of Iron IV Kaiserreich. Essentially they managed to wipe an army that was on the way from America using 8 ships from the 20s, despite the fact that I have endgame ships patrolling the area.

[Culise]

Someone had entirely too much fun designing the new zombie elite grenadiers since the last time I properly played this game a year or three back.  Manhacks are nasty.  Manhacks that hand-deliver flashbangs to your position are extra-nasty.  Manhacks that hand-deliver flashbangs to your position, then follow up with high-yield explosives while you're blinded and stumbling about are just not kosher.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Cataclysm: DDA

You're doing better than me. It had been a couple of years-ish since I booted up the game, and I can't even figure out how to access a lonely edge-of-city building without running into a shocker hulk and two-dozen other things that could easily tear me in half. If you have any advice for early game I'll happily take it.

I'm not sure my advice is any good, since I die easily 10-20 times in the first 2-3 hours in-game for every time I survive.  I'm not sure if it's just that I lost my old feel for the primary threats or if it's just that they made the first day that much nastier.  Anyways...
1. Scouting is key to survival.  Key enemies to avoid in the early game are survivor zeds, brutes, hulks, and juggernauts.  Shockers of all sorts are even nastier in groups now.  Shocker hulks, as you note, are murderous; they will punch you through a wall, stun you with a lightning blast, and punch you through a wall again.  You can outrun most with the run (") toggle as long as you haven't depleted your stamina, but all types of feral zeds seem to be fast enough to catch you, something I (re)learned the hard way trying to outrun half a dozen ferals...

2. A good weapon is a top priority.  Cutting weapons can get stuck in an enemy at low skill levels, and they don't work well against skeletal enemies in either case.  Tearing down a curtain, beating up some wreckage with a stone hammer (rock-onna-stick) to make a metal spike, and combining the lot to make a knife spear used to be a viable option, especially since you can (f)ire it to hit an enemy two tiles away.  Baseball bats are still great; that game in question started because I found (a) a lucky early baseball bat and (b) a barbed wire fence, which I could combine. 

3. Note where working vehicles are, even if they don't have much fuel in them.  My early game lately tends to be a mad dash through a massive scenario-start horde to the nearest working vehicle, which I then use to play bumper-zeds.  I've used such vehicles also to take down zeds outside my weight class, though the mass disparity means they don't work quite as well against hulks or juggernauts. 

4. Taking on multiple zeds at once is even more suicidal than it used to be.  Grabs are even more dangerous now.  Combat apparently now drains your focus as well, making low morale far more dangerous; I may have discovered the negative effects of this fighting a horde of zombie kids in a rain storm. 

5. I think shady zombies have nightvision or something.  They've given me more than their fair share of pain when I try early night raids to sneak past zombies, unless I'm unlucky.  Mind their location if you plan any night raids.  Actually, I just looked them up.  They don't have night vision; they're just plain invisible at night unless you're right next to them.

6. Antibiotics don't seem to guarantee infection treatment anymore.  First aid kits don't treat infection anymore; they're now containers for various medical supplies that do not include antibiotics.  Infection was never good, but now it's even more important to avoid it.  I may also have learned this the hard way after screwing up cauterization because I was saving my first aid kits for infections...

7. Moose are secretly Internet debaters; if angered, they can theoretically be deterred by shouting loudly and nonsensically at them.  I haven't actually seen that many moose compared to the older versions, come to think.  That's not to say I miss the old days of psychotic wandering gangs of evil moose, mind...

8. Churches have braziers.  If you don't already have/haven't already built a fireplace, wood stove, or someplace else to cook, grab one by examining it and set it up in your safe house.  It seems to be much better about smoke nowadays than I recall it used to be, which makes it much better for burning fires. 
8a. Speaking of, shallow pits don't seem to contain fire as well anymore.  This I may have also also learned the hard way by setting up a shallow pit for a cookfire outside my house.  Dig 'em deep, and don't fall in.

9. If a house is all boarded up like a safehouse, it probably used to contain survivors; beware of survivor zeds and anti-zombie traps.  I may have learned this the hard way, but really, who in all the heavens sticks an armed land mine in a toilet?  It's a pretty drastic cure for constipation, to say the least...

[Yoink]

My bumbling teammates and I (not saying I'm not partial to a bit o' bumbling and/or bungling from time to time, but these gronks had it down to an art form. One of them had spent a few minutes driving in circles and stopping repeatedly before I stopped trusting him with vehicles) spotted red smoke going up from the bay ahead of us and, since we were running that way already, decided to go get whatever sort of supply drop it signified.

There was a boat almost immediately between us and our quarry. How convenient! I swam straight to it and fired it up. My comrades, however, swam straight past it for some bizarre reason and made the trip under their own power. Whatever, that meant I beat them to it and had first pick of the (mildly) phat loot within the crate. Then, after they had a bit of a rummage themselves and I repositioned the boat, expecting them to climb aboard, two things happened: one of them disconnected, just sitting there treading water, and the other one plunged below the surface and drowned himself.
WTF did they find in that crate?!

I was a bit nonplussed by this. I waited around to see if the other guy was coming back. I tried giving him a few nudges with the boat to see if I could maybe push him to shore, but with no luck. Since he still hadn't reconnected I ploughed my boat back onto the beach and jumped out, almost immediately coming under fire from somewhere up ahead to the left.
Now, I was in just about the worst possible position here. Not only was the beach devoid of any cover (well, apart from the boat), the slope upwards from it was covered in tall grass which made it hard to spot whoever was shooting me from that direction.
Instead I just huddled behind the boat and looked around, quickly spotting another enemy coming along the beach from the opposite direction, possibly attracted by the crate in the water. He was easy fodder for my trusty LMG.

Then, as I was reloading, the friggin' boat blew up after being shot so many times. Near death, I was somehow able to take the five seconds or so and bump myself up to full health with a medkit. Then I crawled away from the boat towards the nearest patch of grass, and managed to take out two more twerps who I saw on the beach to the left of where I landed - I think they may have been the ones who'd been shooting me to start with, but who knows.
I made it to the long grass only to take fire from behind me. I whipped around, spotting the vague brown speck that I believe was my assailant, frantically jabbed a finger at the screen trying to bring up my 4x scope before giving up and opening fire without it - - and dead. Dang.

Well, at least I got an unprecedented three or four kills after making it back to land, on my own and pinned down on the beach.
That was my first time using an LMG, they're actually pretty dang nifty! I think I'll probably try and stick to my usual, boring AR and shotgun combo, though.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

PuBG mobile.

   

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Jesus Christ this game hates me.

I wandered into and O'Driscoll camp, and since O'Driscolls are all a bunch of no-good bastards I took them out. Not a big challenge, but I missed a couple shots due to them running behind some bullet-repellent canvas.

Then while I was looting their camp, a couple more O'Driscolls showed up and started shooting at me. I managed to take them out despite having been ambushed, but one shot flew high over the one dude's head and sailed over a nearby road.

WITNESS: Disturbing the Peace


Apparently someone was close enough to hear that shot, and decided to run back to town and tell everyone about the crazy person firing off shots in the middle of goddamn nowhere and killing off violent gang members. The cur!

Sure enough, a couple lawmen came snooping around trying to find out what kind of reckless maniac would fire off a shot in the hunting grounds more than a mile outside of town. Not wanting to get in trouble with the law, I left the camp and waited for them to conclude their investigation before going back to looting once the coast was clear.

Ah, finally! I could open up the lockbox and get that delicious can of beans they'd hidden away from me! I was just availing myself of their fire to cook a little meat when I heard a shout.

I was suddenly standing in the middle of a full posse of eight lawmen, who had appapparently spawned out of thin air.

They started shooting, I started running... But there were too many of them and they had horses, while I was on foot. I turned to fight, and just barely manage to take them down, with the help of two potent health tonics keeping me upright while surrounded and without any cover. Phew, at least that was over with...

Bounty: $130

Shit. The ghost of one of the dead lawmen had clearly lodged a formal haunting about my misdeeds in defending myself from death. That's more than 25% of my total stash at this point, and I don't feel like it was particularly deserved.

I headed into town and sold off a couple pelts while trying to wrap my head around paying off the bounty... I hopped into the saloon for some whiskey to refresh my cores, and I noticed the grizzled old asshole trapper dude sitting at one of the tables and calling everyone pathetic. Now, I'd heard from someone that you can get a cool hat by beating him up, but I wanted to finish my drink first before throwing knuckles.

While drinking, some random fop shows up and starts talking to my ass about the town's "curse" and what that's supposed to mean.  I try and give him a polite "that's nice dear", but apparently you can't talk while drinking whiskey. So I just stared at him for a bit, trying to see if the conversation prompt would light up once he was properly "finished".

"Hey, what're you staring at, buddy? You tryna start something?"

No, I was not trying to start something, but I couldn't get my words in order to tell him as much, so I just averted my gaze and went back to staring into the liquor.

Motherfucker blindsides me with a fist full of angry impotence. Oh it's on, bitch.

I press the melee button to swing a return strike and show him what a hand is supposed to taste like, but apparently the look in my eyes freaked him out a bit because he immediately turned around to reposition himself.

Y'know what happens when you press the melee button when standing directly behind someone? You perform an uninterruptible stealth kill.

When I got control of myself again, there was a dead fop on the ground, total chaos in the saloon, and someone running out the door to tell the sheriff about how I brutally murdered yet another innocent bystander. Then the mountain man stood up and started fighting with me, because he didn't want to miss out on a fistfight in his saloon.

Then the cops showed up and shot me to death while Ol' Jebediah Tyson was helping me floss by removing my teeth.

Bounty: $145

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Red Dead Redemption 2

Hahahahaha. Oh man. That whole thing is glorious. xD

Reminds me of the time in Fallout 4 where my hideously strong melee-based character was called upon to participate in some stupid mock-fight and wound up brutally snapping the neck of one of the thugs hired to participate in this supposedly staged brawl. Whoopsies.   

[Nighthawk]

Someone had entirely too much fun designing the new zombie elite grenadiers since the last time I properly played this game a year or three back.  Manhacks are nasty.  Manhacks that hand-deliver flashbangs to your position are extra-nasty.  Manhacks that hand-deliver flashbangs to your position, then follow up with high-yield explosives while you're blinded and stumbling about are just not kosher.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Cataclysm: DDA

You're doing better than me. It had been a couple of years-ish since I booted up the game, and I can't even figure out how to access a lonely edge-of-city building without running into a shocker hulk and two-dozen other things that could easily tear me in half. If you have any advice for early game I'll happily take it.

I may have learned this the hard way, but really, who in all the heavens sticks an armed land mine in a toilet?  It's a pretty drastic cure for constipation, to say the least...

I lost it at this. Figures the procedural generation would pull just this kinda stunt.

Anywho, this is all great advice. It's clear I'm hesitating too much, and I had honestly completely forgotten about the sprint function (I stopped playing shortly after it was added, I think). Gonna hop back on, get myself a good ol' rock-onna-stick and and try using cars and buildings to troll zed movement. Wish me luck!

[Rolan7]

"Nuzlocke is awful, and doing it in Crystal Clear is uniquely awful"
Well I wasn't wrong, but I'm not quite right.

Vriskam, Spinarak, 13:  Stomped by a wild Stantler around Christmas
Oconeechee, Larvitar, 29: Fire trainer's Koffing used self-destruct
Rolan, Golem, 48: Brock used Kabutops, which used Surf.
BigRed, Rapidash, 72 (starter): A trainer Heracross in Bugsy's gym.  Tanked flamethrower, used reversal.  UGHHH
KidRadd, Electabuzz, 66: Janine has Blastoise, which has Earthquake.

Most of those were my hubris for rechallenging gyms to grind...  Kinda necessary, though.  The new Elite 4+1 have up to level 65, and have painfully intelligent movesets.  I'm running out of good backups...  I'm levelling up a cheesy toxic-Shuckle, and now a freakin clefairy.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Pokemon Crystal Clear romhack

WTF did they find in that crate?!

Just some books.  The Book of Vile Darkness, The Necronomicon, The Fallout 76 DLC catalog...

[AzyWng]

I started up a new world.

A new character.

As soon as I'm beginning to build a house, a pair of giant queen bees (These things) zoom in.

Yeah. Not the best first impression ever (and I even chose the default difficulty, too).

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Terraria.

[CABL]

I didn't find any warm clothing, so I froze to death.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

NEO Scavenger

[heydude6]

I started up a new world.

A new character.

As soon as I'm beginning to build a house, a pair of giant queen bees (These things) zoom in.

Yeah. Not the best first impression ever (and I even chose the default difficulty, too).

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Terraria.

That... isn't supposed to happen. Bosses in Terraria are deliberately summoned, with only a few exceptions. Even then, I don't think two queen bees are ever supposed to be alive at once. That is a very strange bug you got there.

[Rolan7]

That is a very strange bug you got there.

Two of them, even

[Kagus]

I didn't find any warm clothing, so I froze to death.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

NEO Scavenger

Hopefully it's been changed since the old days when I used to play the demo, but taking the "Tough" feat or whatever it's called (bonus health and recovery) made you effectively just glare nature into obedience. I ended up testing a few times, and discovered that you could exclusively drink stagnant bog water for weeks and suffer no ill effects, thanks to your immune system growing a massive and intimidating beard. Pretty sure you also shrugged off a lot of the cold as well, especially when combined with the "Fast Metabolism" perk, which hilariously was listed as a penalty so you got an extra perk point for taking it.

There's also the combo where taking two physical combat perks lets you annihilate the intro dogman in the lab, which you can then skin and turn into a fashionable cloak (I believe you need trapper to do the skinning thing).

[EnigmaticHat]

Last time I played I died repeatedly until finally making a combat build, accidentally eating human meat in an event, and then kinda shrugging and becoming a cannibal bandit.  Only way I could figure out to feed myself consistently.

[Kagus]

Trapper is a big one for fighting hunger (I once made the squirrel pimpcape, I'll have you know), both because of the extra squirrel flesh income and also letting you preserve meat for longer by apparently misunderstanding how cold smoking works and just rubbing soot on raw meat instead.

Botanist gives you a little extra in the way of mushrooms and the one berry type you can't just guess at otherwise, and also gives you access to delicious twig juice for relaxing during a cold night in or used topically to disinfect wounds.