Not to sound elitist or anything, but am I the only person in the world who didn't find this game "difficult" to learn? Granted, it's taken me since March this year to learn most of the ins-and-outs of the interface, what's possible/impossible, etc... But I was playing it all that time, doing fun (and !!Fun!!) and interesting things as I discovered more surprises in the game.
Derp, I see I'm definitely not the only one.
Yes, even to this day I still reference the wiki because it's useful and has a lot of good information, and I reference the boards for strategy discussions... But I was already playing the game. The fact that there is no "win" condition seems to really throw people off whereas for me, it liberated me and allows me to play freely without concern for my fortress turning into Hell.
I'm sorry if your fort died on its first year, or its third year, but it was going to fall at some point anyway. And you were playing the game that whole time and you probably learned something new about it in the process. You didn't do it wrong, and you didn't "fail," that's just the nature of the beast.
You can't lose anything because you didn't understand this-or-that feature, because there is nothing to lose. You were never going to "win" in the first place. Failure to REALLY understand this simple truth, I think, is what leads to a lot of (sorry for being indelicate here) whining about how hard the game is. It's probably the easiest game in existence since you set your own rules and goals, there aren't any externally imposed goals you need to hit. It may seem like it, because it may bother you that your dwarfs are lazy or unhappy without booze and beds you didn't know how to provide (like my first ever fortress), but there's nothing anywhere in the game that says your dwarfs must be happy. You don't have to satisfy nobles' whims. You don't have to establish a military. And, in the end, there's no credible way to objectively distinguish between a "successful" and "unsuccessful" fortress.
To a more relevant point, since the game is not even 1/3 done, and most of the features haven't been "locked in," it presents too much of a burden on Toady and Co. to update some internal help system every time the game changes drastically. Maybe once it's v1.00.00, we can start agitating for that (and try to make sense of exactly what kind of help people are asking for in the process, since it's almost always vague or nonsensical), but for now, bitterness about having to reference the extremely informative wiki that thousands have worked hard and collaborated on is misplaced, IMO.