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[lojban]

how do i tell if a girl i like likes me?
we're friends, not too close friends, but friends.
and there's a guy she hangs out with a lot, but i think they're just friends...

so, a couple of questions: the first one, and how do i tell if she and the guy are just friends or not?

[ChairmanPoo]

so, a couple of questions: the first one, and how do i tell if she and the guy are just friends or not?

I'd ask obliquely.

[Dasleah]

You ask.

[The Merchant Of Menace]

For 1 and 2
I'd say just ask.

[x2yzh9]

Sounds a lot like the situation I'm in now. Anyway, what I'd recommend doing is not so much asking(Makes you look as if you have no self-confidence, as far as I know) but rather ask her(casually) if she wants to go to the movies or hang out or whatever. If she says yes and you both have a good time, in maybe 2 weeks or a month ask her out again. Keep talking to her, get her phone number if you don't have it, call and text(don't overdo it. Don't want to look creepy) and make her laugh, I guess.

[Cthulhu]

Not the movies for a first date though, you should be getting to know her, not sitting in a dark room staring at a screen while she's next to you.

[x2yzh9]

Not the movies for a first date though, you should be getting to know her, not sitting in a dark room staring at a screen while she's next to you.

Then what the hell should a first date for him be?

[G-Flex]

You think that the movies is the only place to go with somebody? They could easily go grab lunch someplace, or something like that.

Situations where you can actually talk are good, but movies are useful too in the sense that you get used to simply being together and trying to be comfortable doing the same thing together without the necessity for conversation. Of course, that's assuming you don't just sit there and completely ignore the other person's existence.

[ChairmanPoo]

Of course, that's assuming you don't just sit there and completely ignore the other person's existence.

Yeah, don't do that. Particularily if you have let the girl pay the ticket. It kind of makes you look bad in front of her and (since she will talk) her friends. I should know

[Calhoun]

Of course, that's assuming you don't just sit there and completely ignore the other person's existence.

Yeah, don't do that. Particularily if you have let the girl pay the ticket. It kind of makes you look bad in front of her and (since she will talk) her friends. I should know

Why would you EVER let her pay?

[G-Flex]

Why would she let you pay? Same thing.

[Calhoun]

I disagree. I don't care if anyone wants to call it sexist. Traditionally a man pays for the woman on a date.

[G-Flex]

You disagree with what, exactly? It is sexist, tradition or not. Something being tradition doesn't mean it's good.


Obviously, paying for someone else on a date isn't a bad thing, but why does it have to be gender-specific?

[Calhoun]

Well I suppose it's sexist that one of my biggest scruples is to never hit a woman. I don't think it's wrong.

I'm not opposed to the idea of the woman paying, but there is no way I'm ever going to not put myself forward as the one to pay.

(Plus, if you are the one asking them out, you really ought to be paying)

[ChairmanPoo]

Why would you EVER let her pay?

I dont know man she just did.
Ah damn, she was hot. And over the years she has only gotten hotter.