Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  
Pages: [1] 2 3

Author Topic: You suck at being god.  (Read 3879 times)

Karnewarrior

  • Bay Watcher
  • That guy who used to be here all the time
    • View Profile
You suck at being god.
« on: October 29, 2010, 07:48:18 pm »

You really do. Most everything you try fails horribly. You have a empty universe to work with.

What do you do?
Logged
Thou art I, I art Thou.
The trust you have bestowed upon thy comrade is now reciprocated in turn.
Thou shall be blessed when calling upon personae of the Hangman Arcana.
May this tie bind thee to a brighter future!​
Ikusaba Quest! - Fistfighting space robots for the benefit of your familial bonds to Satan is passe, so you call Sherlock Holmes and ask her to pop by.

Lillipad

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #1 on: October 29, 2010, 07:49:31 pm »

It's too dark in this joint, make it brighter!
Logged
Quote from: BaerTaffy
If Adele covered Aerosmith, that would be my life right now.

Jerick

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #2 on: October 29, 2010, 07:49:48 pm »

I make a machine that makes solar systems and set it to auto pilot
Logged

Karnewarrior

  • Bay Watcher
  • That guy who used to be here all the time
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #3 on: October 29, 2010, 07:53:11 pm »

It's too dark in this joint, make it brighter!
You create a gigantic lightbulb. It explodes in your face.

I make a machine that makes solar systems and set it to auto pilot
You create a machine that makes solar syatems. Unfortunately, you not only forgot to hook the autopilot button up to the right connector, but you flipped it with the self destruct button! Luckily, the self destruct button doesn't work, because that would be retarded. But the machine is slow and clunky, and in a fit of anger you kick it.

You now have a painfully stubbed toe.
Logged
Thou art I, I art Thou.
The trust you have bestowed upon thy comrade is now reciprocated in turn.
Thou shall be blessed when calling upon personae of the Hangman Arcana.
May this tie bind thee to a brighter future!​
Ikusaba Quest! - Fistfighting space robots for the benefit of your familial bonds to Satan is passe, so you call Sherlock Holmes and ask her to pop by.

Lillipad

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #4 on: October 29, 2010, 07:56:22 pm »

Hire Voltron to fix the accursed solar system maker so we can focus on fixing our toe.
Logged
Quote from: BaerTaffy
If Adele covered Aerosmith, that would be my life right now.

Jerick

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #5 on: October 29, 2010, 07:57:13 pm »

I know we're going to regret this but I make lots and lots of fire contained in a single point.
Logged

The Doctor

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #6 on: October 29, 2010, 08:04:46 pm »

Make a salamander?


Then poke it!~
Logged

RAM

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #7 on: October 29, 2010, 09:00:03 pm »

Create a garbage dump to throw all your failures into, make its contents invisible so that you don't have to look at it.
Logged
Vote (1) for the Urist scale!
I shall be eternally happy. I shall be able to construct elf hunting giant mecha. Which can pour magma.
Urist has been forced to use a friend as fertilizer lately.
Read the First Post!

Furtuka

  • Bay Watcher
  • High Priest of Mecha
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #8 on: October 29, 2010, 09:00:59 pm »

Make a planet out of adamantite
Logged
It's FEF, not FEOF

CJ1145

  • Bay Watcher
  • *Insert Meme Here*
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #9 on: October 29, 2010, 09:04:30 pm »

Set out to fail at everything you do.
Logged
This being Homestuck, I'm not sure whether that's post-scratch Rose or Vriska with a wig.

KaguroDraven

  • Bay Watcher
  • Forward!
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #10 on: October 29, 2010, 11:11:21 pm »

Try to create zombies to roam the universe.
Logged
"Those who guard their back encounter death from the front." - Drow Proverb.
I will punch you in the soul if you do that again.
"I'm going to kill another dragon and then see if I can't DUAL-WIELD DRAGONS!
Because I can"-WolfTengu

Karnewarrior

  • Bay Watcher
  • That guy who used to be here all the time
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #11 on: October 29, 2010, 11:26:59 pm »

Hire Voltron to fix the accursed solar system maker so we can focus on fixing our toe.
Unfortunately, Voltron does not exist, except in your imagination. No amount of godly energy can call Voltron into existance. None.

I know we're going to regret this but I make lots and lots of fire contained in a single point.
You focus alot of fire into a single point, and then you make a couch to hide behind. To your surprise, the point of fire does not explode or fizzle or pop bacon grease onto your bare arms. The couch does though. You sustain minor burns all over your body. But now you have a sun!

Make a salamander?


Then poke it!~
You do so. This is a stupid idea, with obvious repercussions.

Create a garbage dump to throw all your failures into, make its contents invisible so that you don't have to look at it.
You create a invisible garbage dump. Unfortunately you don't like the look of it and in a fit of stupidity attempt to trash the trash.

The resulting paradox eats your little finger.

You are now bleeding. Since you're god, this means nothing.

Make a planet out of adamantite
You do so, but the planet lacks gravity, and all your pretty flowers float out into space and get in your eyes and make them itch. It is highly uncomfortable.

Set out to fail at everything you do.
You succeed admirably.

Try to create zombies to roam the universe.
You create a zombie. It immediately explodes due to lack of atmosphere. any atmosphere at all. Like, not even a atom per mile or something crazy like that.
Logged
Thou art I, I art Thou.
The trust you have bestowed upon thy comrade is now reciprocated in turn.
Thou shall be blessed when calling upon personae of the Hangman Arcana.
May this tie bind thee to a brighter future!​
Ikusaba Quest! - Fistfighting space robots for the benefit of your familial bonds to Satan is passe, so you call Sherlock Holmes and ask her to pop by.

Lillipad

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #12 on: October 29, 2010, 11:31:35 pm »

Make dust so we can start making some doomed planets.
Logged
Quote from: BaerTaffy
If Adele covered Aerosmith, that would be my life right now.

Megaman

  • Bay Watcher
  • What is love?
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #13 on: October 29, 2010, 11:36:52 pm »

Add gravity and atmosphere into planet.
Logged
Hello Hunam

RAM

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: You suck at being god.
« Reply #14 on: October 29, 2010, 11:49:36 pm »

Get flowers in your face and sneeze out a galaxy.
Logged
Vote (1) for the Urist scale!
I shall be eternally happy. I shall be able to construct elf hunting giant mecha. Which can pour magma.
Urist has been forced to use a friend as fertilizer lately.
Read the First Post!
Pages: [1] 2 3