I think my perception of time's been buggered by Paradox games.
See, ten years ago I was still a teenager. Me being a teenager feels like a lifetime ago. I'm really not the same person as I was back then, my dad was alive, I knew almost nobody I'm friends with now, none of them were at university because we were all still in school, it's not even been a decade since I last saw some of the people in my year.
And yet, ten years also feels like absolutely no time in the grand scheme of things. Despite how long a decade feels, if I was told I had a decade to live I'd think that's far, far, far too short. Nothing happens in a decade, people don't change much. And I think it's because Paradox games actually anchor stuff to a date and timespan that vanishes in front of your eyes that my brain's thinking like that. It's not some arbitrary turn system, or "X years" in some system that's too divorced from reality to make sense like the Civilization games.
Ultimately I'm hoping for some life-extension technology at least. I mean, I want to be able to do everything I want and leave this universe on my own terms, but more time will do me.
You know, I think my depression, recovery and trans-ness has done something to me. It's like I'm experiencing or have experienced a severe psychological shift in how I see the world and my own life. I don't know if this is good or bad, guess I'll just have to see.