I have no clue what the hell my sexuality even is right now. Like, I get crushes on boys and girls (which has mostly been biased towards boys recently, oddly enough), but I only feel sexual desire towards girls. Stranger still, I've noticed that if I have a crush on someone, I don't feel much of an urge to have sex with them. If I'm sexually attracted to someone, I wouldn't want to be in a romantic relationship with them. I don't know why romance and sex are mutually exclusive in my head, but it is.
I'm not even sure if my sexuality qualifies as one, or if it's just a mishmash of preferences glued together into this fucking black box of a system. Sometimes I give it data about people, and sometimes it says "you like them" and sometimes it says "you don't like them, not in that way". Well gee, sexuality, what do I do with that information? Do I analyze it for months on end? Should I remind myself that I like this person? Do I throw it off a cliff?
The thing that's getting me so worked up about it is that I don't know how to use it. I can feed some random bullshit to it, and maybe it'll print something out, but I don't think it's particularly useful the way I'm doing it. I don't know how to operate this thing, nor do I understand its output.
And all of this because I listened to a song. Must be a pretty good song if it makes me philosophize on the nature of my sexuality.