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Author Topic: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O  (Read 14887601 times)

Rolan7

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151500 on: May 17, 2020, 12:02:36 am »

I appreciate using "they" for people by default, I do that too.  It's almost like it's weird to emphasize someone's gender with every pronoun and many adverbs (or much more often in other Romance languages).

Not thinking about this issue is a privilege something that's natural when you roughly conform to the gender expected of your sex.  Which is true of most people.  There's nothing at all wrong with that.

(Though heck, there was a time when I was against the gender binary altogether, for anyone- I see that like my angry atheist phase:  Burned and lashing out, angry at the system that kept hurting me.  I was wrong.)

"Don't worry about it" doesn't work for some people, because it's actually pretty complicated to be non-cis.  It's like telling a homosexual high schooler not to worry about their sexuality - "labels are unimportant", "just be yourself", etc.  That doesn't actually work out, because being different is... different.  Even in a utopian school where nobody is outright hostile, every social interaction is slightly different.  And dating is entirely so.

But the message that such a condition is fine and okay - that's sweet and appreciated, at least by me.  Thank you.
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LordBaal

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151501 on: May 17, 2020, 01:35:00 am »

As you said Rolan, romance languages use a gender orientated pronoun for EVERYTHING, in fact there's people around trying to change this, which honestly I'm against because we also have neutral ways to address people (and no, changing the last letter for things, which also denote gender "a" for female, "o" for male doesn't work either).

Despite being rather conservative am also respectful of others, and I restrict that conservationism for myself only and let people alone as long no real harm is caused, and in this case we have a saying here which roughly translates to "each can make a flower vase of his ass". So sorry if sometimes I come across as rude, sometimes I have a hard time getting into other people's shoes.

At any rathe I will accept any of you guys and most people however you want to perceive yourselves, be it across a computer monitor or across a table sharing a coffee. In fact I would love for all of us to have the first Dwarf Fortress convention (if such thing doesn't already exists) Anyway, I digress, but not all people have this mindset, so you'll have to grow a bigger hide to deflect some other people opinions and get used to people simply not acknowledging your self perception be it by custome (most people use gender pronoums and that will probably will be keep as the norm because in a big percentage of conversations it's more practical), mistake or simply not knowing you before hand.
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scriver

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151502 on: May 17, 2020, 02:49:41 am »

Also, since you mentiomed anxiety over it: I am myself a pretty feminine man, both in body and nature. And that's entirely okay. Sure, there's a bunch of people who'll probably never want to be my friends me, but I probably don't want to be friends with them either.

And you know. As I've grown up I've felt people caring about that less and less, and I've grown to care about it less myself. As a kid I grew up being treated with contempt by my peers for being less masculine, and I got a bunch of issues because of that (including most of my homophobia (as well as my theories of homophobia ;) )being rooted in it), but you know, kids are cruel. But as I got older people, well, matured. I often think of my gymnasium years as the best ones of my life simply because I felt I could be more like myself and be accepted among my school mates.

I know there's probably a lot of difference in macho culture between Sweden and Brazil. I also don't know how correct my impression of Brazil is, but as I've understood it there is a lot of hypersexualisation of bodies in your country, and the male body being pushed is the overmusculatured, gym-bro one. I can see how being feminine or non-masculine (I will hold to my death that there is a difference ;) ) man in those circumstances might lead one to ponder or doubt one's gender. But what that culture hype isn't what's normal. Hell, even non-hyper-macho standard machismo culture is pushing something that's at the far end of the range of "normalcy", not what is centre of it. And there's nothing wrong with deviating from their dislocated standard.

So you do you. I'll call you by whatever you want (but not DeathSword though, never DeathSword ;), whatever conclusion your introspection takes you to. I just don't want you to draw conclusions about yourself because your embarrassed by yourself, or because cultural pressure has shamed you into thinking you're not "enough of a man".

I'm thinking of all this now because just the other day I saw an interview with one Sweden's foremost trans-culture personalities. They came out earlier this year as somebody who felt they probably weren't transsexual at all, and probably wouldn't have transitioned today if they had the choice. They said that when they were younger they just couldn't come to terms with their attraction to men and their own homophobia. And it struck me (who still vividly remember the shame of my childhood over ) very close that still in this day and age, which as far as I feel our society has come, somebody can feel such shame and guilt over themselves that they would rather go through such large changes than accept themselves as they are. I don't wish that shame and guilt on anyone, that kind of shame is a wound in your soul, an infection in how you think of yourself. They ended the interview with her saying that they hoped they would have been accepted as a feminine, gay man just as they hope for acceptance as the woman they are today. And I hope the same. So basically what I am trying yo say win this mess of scrivened thoughts is that when you think and feel this through and find out where you feel best about yourself, consider also that it feels good because that is where you feel you are, and not just because it takes you away from being someplace else.
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Yoink

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151503 on: May 17, 2020, 03:09:45 am »

I just don't understand why people are so quick to assign themselves specific labels rather than just, y'know, being themselves.   
I'm a fairly "girly" dude, myself. I enjoy poetry, I (used to) take meticulous care of my hair and general appearance, I appreciate the occasional sappy romance and I will happily spend hours cooing over an adorable cat or other little critter. That doesn't make me any less of a man. Oh, you think it does, cunno? Fight me then!   

Doesn't really matter what gender you were born as, you're allowed to just be yourself.   
Sexual orientation is obviously a separate issue from "gender identity" or whatever y'all are calling it these days.   
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KittyTac

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151504 on: May 17, 2020, 04:26:17 am »

I'm quite tolerant of homosexuality or non-binary genders, despite living in a highly conservative society and being a straight white male. Honestly it doesn't matter to me, just be yourself.
« Last Edit: May 17, 2020, 04:30:13 am by KittyTac »
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Akura

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151505 on: May 17, 2020, 08:00:25 am »

Broke my keyboard, the zxcvm,. keys stopped working. Using on-screen keyboard to type. Tried fixing, but the little plastic bits don't line up with the circuit membrane now, or even stay in place. So now, nothing but qweruio and few numpad keys work. On the plus side, that might have been the original problem; the contacts coming loose. There was damage to the paper backing behind the circuit membrane, but I don't think that I did that. Looks more like poor manufacturing workmanship.

I did look up replacement keyboards, but I can't find one where the Fn key is on the left. And yes, that is more important than it sounds. Also, many are marketed with a specific kind of contact that is designed to make a loud clicking sound as you type. Like, being as obnoxiously loud as possible is advertised as a selling point.
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pisskop

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151506 on: May 17, 2020, 08:08:16 am »

I have a spare keyboard I keep for just such occasions.  And also because I own laptops, not desktops.  sometimes a physical keyboard is better than the reduced ones on my laptops.

Either way, though, bummer.
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Akura

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151507 on: May 17, 2020, 08:26:35 am »

There's a small chance I have one too, but I probably abandoned it at my old house.
Might've found a winner to replace it though. Depends on how hard it would be to swap the Windows and Fn keys.
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King Zultan

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151508 on: May 17, 2020, 09:20:39 am »

Broke my keyboard, the zxcvm,. keys stopped working. Using on-screen keyboard to type. Tried fixing, but the little plastic bits don't line up with the circuit membrane now, or even stay in place. So now, nothing but qweruio and few numpad keys work. On the plus side, that might have been the original problem; the contacts coming loose. There was damage to the paper backing behind the circuit membrane, but I don't think that I did that. Looks more like poor manufacturing workmanship.
My last laptop did that every now and then, so if your lucky it might start working again.
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Akura

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151509 on: May 17, 2020, 10:06:34 am »

Another attempt, and I've gotten some keys back. The ones that definitely don't work are space, gh'zxcvbnm,./ as well as a few numpad keys. The reason so many contacts fell out last time was because the keyboard was flat on the desk, pressing all of them. I had some temporary function in a few of the broken ones, so I know they're possibly fixable.
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Rose

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151510 on: May 17, 2020, 10:49:34 am »

I just don't understand why people are so quick to assign themselves specific labels rather than just, y'know, being themselves.   
I'm a fairly "girly" dude, myself. I enjoy poetry, I (used to) take meticulous care of my hair and general appearance, I appreciate the occasional sappy romance and I will happily spend hours cooing over an adorable cat or other little critter. That doesn't make me any less of a man. Oh, you think it does, cunno? Fight me then!   

Doesn't really matter what gender you were born as, you're allowed to just be yourself.   
Sexual orientation is obviously a separate issue from "gender identity" or whatever y'all are calling it these days.   
Interests and gender are totally different things, though.
Like, there's a difference between an effeminate man and a woman, same like there's a difference between a butch woman and a man.
Also, labels are useful. They're how we describe things. Without labels, language just plain doesn't exist.
I describe myself as a woman, because that's what I am, some birth defects not withstanding.
Knowing a label to call yourself is comforting. It says "There are enough other people that feel the same way as me that there's a name for it."
Im an atheist. That's a label. I'm a dwarf fortress player. That's also a, label. Both are useful and descriptive.
Personally, I have very little of any feminine interests. That doesn't make me feel like any less of a woman though.
There are some surgeries that I want to get that no man would ever possibly want, so that's a, good indicator too, though in all fairness, is not actually a requirement at all.
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Mathel

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151511 on: May 17, 2020, 11:36:34 am »

My view is similar to Rose's.
I consider myself a man not because of interests, but because I have a Y chromosome.
I see gender to be given by genetics, not by mind.
I also consider ascribing gender to a person's mind, rather than their body, pointless. Since every person's mind probably different, that we would have to have at least as many words for them, as there are people.

However, there appear to be enough people not feeling comfortable with their gender, that there should be such considerations.

In the end, I call people based on their physical gender or gender I can guess based on other details. (Such as King Zultan calling himself "King"). If I can't make a guess, I usually use "he/she" or "they". But I mean it as what a person is, not who.
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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151512 on: May 17, 2020, 12:05:33 pm »

-snip-
When the fuck did you change your username and how am I only noticing it now?
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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151513 on: May 17, 2020, 12:22:52 pm »

It's been within like the last day. That wasn't their username last time I looked at this thread :P
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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #151514 on: May 17, 2020, 12:26:48 pm »

-snip-
When the fuck did you change your username and how am I only noticing it now?
What was their username earlier?
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