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[Billy]

That pun made me squirm. Don't try to hook me

[Dunamisdeos]

Is this super common or what? I have never seen a plump helmet man monster slayer. He is literally made of food. The relative bravery, guile, and power of this crusader against evil must be staggering. I look forward to seeing what his deal is.

Spoiler: Zuglar Ishenvabok, Hero? (click to show/hide)

[Gentlefish]

Also worked Black Friday retail. Aside from opening half an hour early, and some coworkers possibly trying to sabotage my work(alternate explanation, they're goddamn incompetent), there wasn't anything happening. There was one incident where someone found a bottle labeled "holy water", and started splashing it around like they were sanctifying the place with it, and the room smelled like ashes for a while afterwards. I'm actually pretty irritated with that, there's a very good reason why nobody is supposed to be playing with liquids. I still remember the incident where someone found a bottle of pepper spray.

It was actually rather uneventful. There was a bunch of sales on gun safes, some truck boxes, and bird seed, but that's about it.  It was honesty busier last Saturday.

I'm curious if anyone got all three at once and if any of them were named "Wile E. Coyote".

Never attribute to malice what can be explained by incompetence.

I also had to work black Friday! At a library at tech support. So slow.

[smjjames]

Also worked Black Friday retail. Aside from opening half an hour early, and some coworkers possibly trying to sabotage my work(alternate explanation, they're goddamn incompetent), there wasn't anything happening. There was one incident where someone found a bottle labeled "holy water", and started splashing it around like they were sanctifying the place with it, and the room smelled like ashes for a while afterwards. I'm actually pretty irritated with that, there's a very good reason why nobody is supposed to be playing with liquids. I still remember the incident where someone found a bottle of pepper spray.

It was actually rather uneventful. There was a bunch of sales on gun safes, some truck boxes, and bird seed, but that's about it.  It was honesty busier last Saturday.

I'm curious if anyone got all three at once and if any of them were named "Wile E. Coyote".

Sounds like you have some real idiots at your workplace.

Is this super common or what? I have never seen a plump helmet man monster slayer. He is literally made of food. The relative bravery, guile, and power of this crusader against evil must be staggering. I look forward to seeing what his deal is.

Spoiler: Zuglar Ishenvabok, Hero? (click to show/hide)

Behold the DF story generator! It did spawn the likes of that famous elf, forget the name (yes, call me a heretic, lol), treebeard or something.

[Yoink]

So bloody tired today. Had too many dramatic dreams last night to get much sleep. I'm out of coffee. I actually went and bought some food from the supermarket but didn't remember my need for coffee until I was at the checkout and was already too sick of the shopping experience to be bothered going back for it. Anxious. Somehow my tiredness simultaneously is making me more anxious than usual, but also less likely to freak out completely about minor embarrassments. Still stressful though.

I have several things I am supposed to be doing today but I have accomplished none of them. Tried to buy a black collared workshirt but there are apparently so such shirts to be had around here. I thought I found one but it was really dark blue and I think I am maybe a little colourblind.

Hopefully I can at least make it to the gig I'm heading to tonight before 6pm to get a $10 jug of beer. I feel like cold beer is something I need right now.

It's not even very hot today compared to the weather we've been having, but the description of a swelteringly hot day in The Great Gatsby was so vivid that after reading it it feels ten degrees hotter than it really is.

[smjjames]

Don't drink the jug of beer all at once though. Unless it's not a gallon container as I'm imagining it.

Also, it's Australia, which is like 90%* arid and hot.

*Okay, yeah, I'll admit I'm exaggerating a bit for dramaticness. Though a huge amount of it really is desert and arid scrub.

[Lord Shonus]

There is something fundamentally absurd about 2 $35.00 concert tickets costing $96. There really needs to be some regulation of these "because we can" fees.

[Yoink]

Don't drink the jug of beer all at once though. Unless it's not a gallon container as I'm imagining it.

Nah, after a bit of a Google a jug is apparently less than half of a gallon.
[spoiler=See here.]

Now you've made me sad that our pubs don't sell beer by the gallon.
Also it's only 32 degrees, apparently! And it's not even overly sunny.
Just feels weirdly hot. Maybe I've a fever.

[Lord Shonus]

Don't drink the jug of beer all at once though. Unless it's not a gallon container as I'm imagining it.

Nah, after a bit of a Google a jug is apparently less than half of a gallon.

A 1.1 liter "jug" would be about a third of a US gallon or around a quarter of a British one.

[smjjames]

Humidity probably, humid heat can feel hotter than dry heat.

[Billy]

I'll take a gallon of apple juice sir.

[Reelya]

Australia has the best criminals (after USA of course)
http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/real-life/true-stories/perth-man-charged-over-alleged-45-minute-naked-solo-crime-spree/news-story/1f1b72877f0a98e536b9a10a22e2173a

A guy in Perth went on a naked home-invasion crime spree. I would have put this in the funny thread except the attacks including bricking a sleeping woman in the head, pitchfork attacks and trying to set people on fire with petrol.

[Helgoland]

Don't drink the jug of beer all at once though. Unless it's not a gallon container as I'm imagining it.

Nah, after a bit of a Google a jug is apparently less than half of a gallon.

A 1.1 liter "jug" would be about a third of a US gallon or around a quarter of a British one.

U so cray-cray

[Helgoland]

Is this super common or what? I have never seen a plump helmet man monster slayer. He is literally made of food. The relative bravery, guile, and power of this crusader against evil must be staggering. I look forward to seeing what his deal is.

Spoiler: Zuglar Ishenvabok, Hero? (click to show/hide)

Can someone draw this? Pwetty pwease?

[wierd]

Sitting here at work.

One of our residents is deciding to burn the midnight oil.  They are watching the history channel.

Naturally, It *has* to be "Ancient Aliens".  (because that is all History covers these days. For reasons I cannot fathom.)

Today's episode-- Transhumanism, drugs to extend human life, genetic engineering, et al--- YUP, all extraterrestrial, somehow.

Because

1) The desire to transcend your limitations via technology is not as old as human kind, and just as ubiquitous-- NO, aliens MUST be involved!
2) The cultural ubiquity of drugs to extend life in ancient myths does not stem from a universal fear of death in mankind-- NO, the aliens MUST have had a REAL THING!
3) Genetic engineering is totally us copying aliens! No other reason!

I can feel my brain shrinking from the passive exposure to this program.  Somebody should do a study to see if programs like this cause increased progression in elders with dementia, so we can have a legitimate reason to turn this shit off.

Edit

Oh gawd it is getting worse.  Now, they are yabbering about nanorobotics, and how "if we can master that, we can become more like our ancient alien ancestors," and then it doubled down on the stupid with "Ancient messopotamian tablets record the continued rule of ancient kings for thousands of years, giving strong proof that rulers in the past enjoyed tremendously long lifetimes."

Apparently the concept of religious cult of personality in establishing a dynastic mythos is lost on these people, even though they need look no further than the Kim dynasty in North Korea. No, clearly it is all the work of ancient aliens, because damnit, aliens.  ALIENS.

....  Urgh.  My brains reject this thing with such intensity!

Edit again

URGH-- NO, they are NOT true historical documents! NO!.  UNNGH...