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Author Topic: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O  (Read 14968082 times)

Dunamisdeos

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115755 on: December 23, 2016, 03:17:22 pm »

*slowly closes and locks door to secret monkey apocalypse research facility*
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Rolepgeek

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115756 on: December 23, 2016, 03:32:46 pm »

To be fair, I think if we found out monkeys had gotten their hands on nuclear launch codes we'd get pretty damn worried. Firstly because how the hell did they do that?
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Greiger

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115757 on: December 23, 2016, 03:38:35 pm »

« Last Edit: December 23, 2016, 03:44:53 pm by Greiger »
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martinuzz

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115758 on: December 23, 2016, 03:53:52 pm »

The only fear I have always had of dentists is that I will accidentally bite off their finger while not feeling it because of the novocaine.
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Kot

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115759 on: December 23, 2016, 03:57:00 pm »

The only fear I always have had of dentists was TAKE OUT YOUR FINGERS OUT OF MY FUCKING MOUTH THAT IS PRIVATE SPACE GODDAMNIT DO NOT TOUCH.
I get really uncomfortable when something I do not have control over gets in my mouth (or, honestly, ears, nose and I would suppose ass, but thankfully I've never had anyone go down there), which is why I always had trouble with those funny wooden sticks that various doctors put in your mouth to hold the tongue down so they can see better and such.
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MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115760 on: December 23, 2016, 04:10:16 pm »

Indoctrination theory also makes no sense, and also just shoots the series in the back of the head in the best of interpretations.

What really makes sense is the original dark energy plot, which was referenced as far back as ME1 and also makes the title of the series relevant.

You can't just mention a theory I've never heard of and then not explain it like that!
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

No, I've heard about the indoctrination theory. It is the dark energy plot I haven't heard about.
Essentially, the original overarching plot of ME before Bioware's acquisition by EA and the wholesale destruction of the development team had to do with a severe buildup of dark energy caused by the use of the mass effect.

The early mentions of this were in one of ME1's sidequests and the Haestrom mission in ME2. Haestrom shows the seriousness of it, as the planet's star has entered a dying phase billions of years early. That an early quarian colony is in the same system is no coincidence. When element zero is placed under an electric charge, you of course get the proportional reduction of mass that constitutes the mass effect. However, what everyone doesn't know is that this process also creates massive amounts of mostly-unnoticeable dark energy, which in abundance disrupts stellar fusion.

This is the true reason for the Reaper invasion. Eons ago, some ancestor race (would eventually be retooled as the Leviathans) figured out that this was happening. No stellar society would be willing to give it all up, but refusing to do so would ensure the destruction of not just their own society but the entire galaxy permanently. So, the Relays were constructed to efficiently funnel all intelligent life along a certain pathway of mass effect development and a literal pathway towards the Citadel, which for most cycles ended up a natural center of galactic governance as well. The Reapers would arrive every 50,000 years and be easily able to track down all civilizations that had uncovered the mass effect so that they could be processed into more Reapers. Part genocide, part archiving, and part immortality, but in the end it would mean that no civilization capable of using element zero could grow to such heights that it would set off an unstoppable cascade of star death. The Reapers, for their part, spent most of their time powered down outside the galactic rim. In the thousands of years in-between harvests, the dark energy content of the galaxy would be able to fall. An elegant solution to a universal problem, or as Sovereign put it "creating order from the chaos of organic evolution". The Reapers are not capricious murderers, but truly are our salvation through destruction.

How's that for a cosmic moral dilemma? Certainly better than "synthetics and organics fight all the time ikd". Not only is it just a better plot overall, but it does introduce the very clear consequence that even if Shepard does defeat the Reapers somehow, it will only result in the inevitable downfall of the current and all future civilizations through mass stellar acceleration. An act of truly supreme selfishness.

I believe there were some points about how the Crucible's original purpose was to be a giant eezo battery that could kick off the collapse immediately if used, and thus a meaningful threat to bargain against the Reapers with, but that's about the whole of it as far as the abandoned plot goes. It doesn't fully fix ME's problems, like the absurdity of ME2's entire plot being where it is, but it's a hell of a lot better than what we got.
« Last Edit: December 23, 2016, 04:16:47 pm by MetalSlimeHunt »
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Neonivek

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115761 on: December 23, 2016, 05:49:29 pm »

My theory is they originally planned for Shepherd not to be in the second game or AT LEAST not be the primary character... So a lot of the... bad stuff... in the second game is entirely due to marketing interfering with the design process.

Also humanity is REALLY odd in Mass Effect... They started out as sort of losers (well ok... we are a young race), but second game it is revealed that actually we are one of the primary races.
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TD1

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115762 on: December 23, 2016, 05:55:07 pm »

Dentists: The injection is my most feared part. Anything to do with needles makes me dizzy.
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Shadowlord

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115763 on: December 23, 2016, 06:03:27 pm »

It was especially noticeable in me3 that
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Shep was alive at the end of the first game, neo. I'm just saying.
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Taricus

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115764 on: December 23, 2016, 06:04:47 pm »

Also humanity is REALLY odd in Mass Effect... They started out as sort of losers (well ok... we are a young race), but second game it is revealed that actually we are one of the primary races.
Yeah that's always struck me as very peculiar. Then again, it can be somewhat chalked up to the hegemony and various terminus nations just being N/A on any relevent comparisons. And it only calls humanity fourth, there's not much hard data to see how close or far it is from number three on that list.
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Neonivek

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115765 on: December 23, 2016, 06:18:39 pm »

It is funny that Humanity's major export in the ME universe is villainy :P
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Kot

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115766 on: December 23, 2016, 06:19:40 pm »

It is funny that Humanity's major export everywhere is villainy :P
ftfy
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MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115767 on: December 23, 2016, 06:28:59 pm »

My theory is they originally planned for Shepherd not to be in the second game or AT LEAST not be the primary character... So a lot of the... bad stuff... in the second game is entirely due to marketing interfering with the design process.
That's not the problem with Mass Effect 2. The problem with Mass Effect 2 is that it makes no sense in any version of the plot to give a shit about the Collectors or for Shepard to help Cerberus. At this point the Reaper invasion is already impending. The only reasonable thing to do is to direct any and all efforts towards waking up the galaxy, i.e. everything that happens in ME3 but not in the middle of the war. A couple thousand humans being abducted by aliens is literally sidequest-tier.

I personally think that the writers ironically ended up with a far more severe version of what Ashely brings up in ME1: how does a soldier with a rifle have any meaningful impact on something like the Reapers existing? The answer is for Shepard to make themselves into a symbol and effect change at critical points, which they did to some degree, but 90% of everything that happens after Ilos in the series is either worthless or should have happened earlier.

The one good version of ME2's plot I heard was the idea that it should switch places with ME1. It's a proportional reason for Shepard to become a Spectre, and all the Reaper shit gets hinted at but never explained throughout the whole game, including the absolute what-the-fuck of the Human Reaper. Even so, at the end you still don't have anything confirming that it's anything more than a bunch of screwed up aliens living at the galactic core who might have once been Protheans.

Then, post-credits, show Saren (introduced before as antagonistic and ruthless but not necessarily evil) discovering Sovereign. Then the plot of ME1.
Also humanity is REALLY odd in Mass Effect... They started out as sort of losers (well ok... we are a young race), but second game it is revealed that actually we are one of the primary races.
Yeah that's always struck me as very peculiar. Then again, it can be somewhat chalked up to the hegemony and various terminus nations just being N/A on any relevent comparisons. And it only calls humanity fourth, there's not much hard data to see how close or far it is from number three on that list.
There is a good answer to this, and it's the Reaper's social engineering. The whole galactic system they established for the races of the Milky Way to live in is designed from the ground up to stifle innovation and permanently halt their cultural and military advancement, especially regarding things like the Mass Relays. The Asari and the Salarians have been around for literal thousands of years without substantial change, and the Turians are close as well. The only times the galaxy undergoes significant development after finding the Citadel is during mass crisis or when a new race appears. Humanity are but the latest in a chain of "innovative newcomers" who in time all fall into line with galactic norms and have that reputation forgotten. The Reapers invade before that has a chance to happen.
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Neonivek

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115768 on: December 23, 2016, 06:33:23 pm »

Is it wrong that Mass Effect is reminding me a lot about Captain Planet?
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Akura

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #115769 on: December 23, 2016, 06:37:16 pm »

A few months ago, my parents demanded that I unplug my router and such every time I left the house. Now, they're demanding that I NOT unplug it, saying it uses more electricity than is saved in the 9-10 hours(at work) that it's unplugged to start it back up.

Is it wrong that Mass Effect is reminding me a lot about Captain Planet?

I want off this planet.
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