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[MetalSlimeHunt]

I'm just gonna go ahead and start some preemptive blood sacrifices. That might be the only way to get out of this year alive.

Now, which patron to bank on...

[Gentlefish]

Edit: ...I Miss the good lsp shitposts

i miss the old B12, straight from the meme B12
chop up the elf B12, colonize hell B12
i hate the new B12, the banned dude B12
the always srs B12, feels in the threads B12
i miss the sweet B12, bash in the skull B12

i gotta say, at that time id like to post on B12
see i frequented B12, it wasn't any forums
and now i look and look around and there's so many posters
i used to love B12, i used to love B12
i even had the dwarf beard, i thought I was B12
what if B12 made a thread about B12
called "i miss the old B12," man that would be so B12
that's all it was B12, we still love B12
and i love you like B12 loves B12, hahaha

Man, no one makes Gaston references like cali over here.

[hops]

I now feel bad because I thought that meme originated with Genji from Overwatch getting nerfed.

[Egan_BW]

I'm just gonna go ahead and start some preemptive blood sacrifices. That might be the only way to get out of this year alive.

Now, which patron to bank on...

Repent and praise The Railgun before it's too late.

[Tack]

I thought it was an original... something...

[Edmus]

My life just had a soap opera moment.
On the phone with my boyfriend, he tells me he's out of moisturiser.
"Oh, that's okay, just steal some from [guy who owns the house]!"
I was on loud speaker.
Close friends to [guy who owns the house] were nearby heard me say this.
They have no idea I meant 'borrow some moisturiser from him.'
So now they have reason to believe the boyfriend may steal something and that I am a terrible person.
Substituting 'steal' instead of 'borrow' is ill advised. Don't do it.

[misko27]

I'm just gonna go ahead and start some preemptive blood sacrifices. That might be the only way to get out of this year alive.

That's definitely not the word I would use. I'm just hoping the end isn't too painful.

My life just had a soap opera moment.

The word here is "sitcom". You get really worried and get to wacky hijinks trying to smooth things over and making the worse, only to finally explain everything at the end of the episode. Big hearty group laugh, roll credits.

Substituting 'steal' instead of 'borrow' is ill advised. Don't do it.

This only confirms my paranoia about these things. I never joke about stuff like that. I say pretty ridiculous shit sometimes, but if you actually look at my words I'm extremely careful to watch the implications; even when it's obviously a joke everyone is in on and it would be funny to do so, I still have some strong sense of unease holding me back. I'd be a great politician, or at least a decent diplomat.

[Edmus]

The word here is "sitcom". You get really worried and get to wacky hijinks trying to smooth things over and making the worse, only to finally explain everything at the end of the episode. Big hearty group laugh, roll credits.

Yeah true, were it a soap opera moment this would result in finding my evil twin brother, breaking up with my boyfriend, changing my gender, being framed for a murder, and then dying off screen when my actor quit.

This only confirms my paranoia about these things. I never joke about stuff like that. I say pretty ridiculous shit sometimes, but if you actually look at my words I'm extremely careful to watch the implications; even when it's obviously a joke everyone is in on and it would be funny to do so, I still have some strong sense of unease holding me back. I'd be a great politician, or at least a decent diplomat.

I just learned a lesson there I suppose.
Wish it were only at my own expense though.

[Neonivek]

Goodness television sure often has fast acting poisons.

This guy takes one gulp and before it even has time to get into his stomach he is already dying... a few seconds later and he is spitting up blood.

Are we sure this was poison and not, like, a acid or a bowl of razor blade soup?

Dead in a single minute... Dear goodness...

---

Why ohhh why do I try to find the actual poisons used in this fictional TV show?

Ok... it is fast enough to be Cyanide but the symptoms don't match up.

Let me see... Bloody spit (possibly either from the mouth, lungs, or stomach), foaming at the mouth, Red esasperated eyes... likely from trouble breathing... Fast acting, hard hitting, death in a minute (or so).

As well as being a poison one can sneak into food, one with a powder.

It can't be the same poison as the "Magic Arsenic" because that was a slow acting poison.

[Loud Whispers]

At least this is a lesson you'll never forget. Maybe apologize to your bf's landlord and buy him some moisturizer as an apology gift

[martinuzz]

Edit: ...I Miss the good lsp shitposts

i miss the old B12, straight from the meme B12
chop up the elf B12, colonize hell B12
i hate the new B12, the banned dude B12
the always srs B12, feels in the threads B12
i miss the sweet B12, bash in the skull B12

i gotta say, at that time id like to post on B12
see i frequented B12, it wasn't any forums
and now i look and look around and there's so many posters
i used to love B12, i used to love B12
i even had the dwarf beard, i thought I was B12
what if B12 made a thread about B12
called "i miss the old B12," man that would be so B12
that's all it was B12, we still love B12
and i love you like B12 loves B12, hahaha

Perhaps you are spending too much time in the general discussion subforum. The things you say you miss can all still be found in the DF subforums.

[Neonivek]

Huh I am getting mixed messages about the Voodoo doll.

One source suggests that it is pure marketing and is thusly fake.

Another says it exists but the idea that it is a "curse doll" is the fake part (It is a remembrance doll so to speak)

Then I found stuff that suggests that the IDEA of creating a doll or effigy of a person to curse them is... waaaaaaaaaay older then Voodoo and might have been part of many cultures.

World is too complicated.

[Yoink]

I was on loud speaker.

Ugh, why the heck were you on loud speaker without your knowledge/knowledge of who was nearby?
I think the blame rests on him, there. So many jokes and in-jokes can be strange and/or horrifying to those who aren't familiar with the style of comedy favoured by any particular person/couple/group. I really dislike finding out I'm on speakerphone halfway through a conversation... or being on it at all, for that matter.

[overseer05-15]

I was on loud speaker.

Ugh, why the heck were you on loud speaker without your knowledge/knowledge of who was nearby?
I think the blame rests on him, there. So many jokes and in-jokes can be strange and/or horrifying to those who aren't familiar with the style of comedy favoured by any particular person/couple/group. I really dislike finding out I'm on speakerphone halfway through a conversation... or being on it at all, for that matter.

I can testify to this as one family in-joke once got the police called on me.
Another time it was an exorcism.

[misko27]

16 hours ago, I thought "I should probably do my work for databases so I'm not late".

Now, having spent much of that time working, my mental state could be accurately descibed by this, or possibly this, or perhaps this.

Spoiler: For those of you who don't open videos (click to show/hide)

"Do you hear the voices too?"
"Sanity... is for the weak!"
"I feel the warp overtaking me... It is a good pain!"

Put another way: this is my mind right now.

What have I been doing? The short answer is that PHP is Satan's language of choice, and SQL is the tool of the Four Horsemen.