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[Insanegame27]

Wait, who beat him up?

The girl he said the pickup line to.

So you could get suspended if you were to, let's say, quote Weird Al? "I wanna be your love torpedo, are you picking up the subtle innuendo here?" 

No idea who Weird Al is. Some kid jizzed on another boy's sandwich and got expelled though.

[BlackFlyme]

Weird Al Yankovic is a musician specializing in parody music and what the Hell was that about a sandwich? How? Why?

[NJW2000]

So... wait, what counts as sexual?

Can people have relationships in your school at all? Like, what happens if some couple starts snogging in the classroom? Detention?

RE; the sandwich thing: [Insert David Cameron BLT joke here]

[Insanegame27]

A kid jizzed in another kid's sandwich and the kid ended up eating the sandwich not knowing it had been jizzed in. The kid who did the jizzing got expelled.


The ONLY time males and females are allowed to even touch each other at our school is handshakes and when we did dance class that year.

[Orange Wizard]

A kid jizzed in another kid's sandwich and the kid ended up eating the sandwich not knowing it had been jizzed in. The kid who did the jizzing got expelled.

Ew. Yeah, that's a reasonable thing to be expelled for.

But... no touching, at all? What even is the point of banning that?

[ChairmanPoo]

A kid jizzed in another kid's sandwich and the kid ended up eating the sandwich not knowing it had been jizzed in. The kid who did the jizzing got expelled.

Ew. Yeah, that's a reasonable thing to be expelled for.

But... no touching, at all? What even is the point of banning that?

We shall abolish the orgasm. Our neurologists are at work upon it now. There will be no loyalty, except loyalty towards Apple. There will be no love, except the love of Jobs. There will be no laughter, except the laugh of triumph over a defeated enemy. There will be no art, no literature, no science. There will be no curiosity, no enjoyment of the process of life. All competing pleasures will be destroyed. But always — do not forget this, Winston — always there will be the intoxication of power, constantly increasing and constantly growing subtler. Always, at every moment, there will be the thrill of victory, the sensation of trampling on an enemy who is helpless.

If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face — forever.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[Insanegame27]

It's moments like this I wish SMF had a 'like post' function

WTF: SMF has no like post function

[Tawa]

You'll never succeed, Kellogg!

[Akura]

We shall abolish the orgasm. Our neurologists are at work upon it now.

You are Kellog? EDIT: Damn, Tawa ninja'd me.

What kind of school is this? Some heavily religion-themed one with a total lack of knowledge of human reproduction?


I remember one time where a kid punched me in the face in class. They tried to suspend me for twice as long as the other kid. Why? He claimed I hit him first. Thing is, nobody saw that, but everyone saw him punch me. And before that, he grabbed me from behind, which I may or may not have thrown my arm back to shake him off, which may or may not have struck him(but nowhere near the force he hit me with), but I don't remember(it got forgotten in the whole facepunch bit) and not a single person saw me do anything(including the teacher). My parents managed to convince them to reduce my suspension.

The worst part of it was the school cop who escorted us to the office repeatedly threatening me with arrest if I tried to attack him again despite me standing still and being silent while the other kid continued to threaten me right in front of the cop. By the way, the kid was black, and the cop was a black/hispanic mix. Said cop, during a previous incident, illegally searched an entire classroom(including myself) looking for a lost pair a of sunglasses that the substitute teacher had in fact dropped in the back of the class.

[Insanegame27]

It's a Christian School, even with all the rules it has, it is much better than my last one.


Oh, One thing I do like about my school is that fights happen and the teachers can dismiss it as the whole Boys will be boys thing so long as everyone involved in the fight says that's what it was.


My not-really-a-friend got in huge amounts of trouble for hitting the school flyweight boxing champion (or something like that... damn that kid hits hard) because he should have known better was how the principal put it. My not-a-friend hit the boxer in the back of the head (bruising his fist in the process... he hits like a little girl) and the boxer destroyed him.


And wait... school cops?

[Akura]

Yes, school cops. Just about every school in America now has uniformed, badge-wearing, gun-carrying police officers assigned to them as security. The school near where I live also has a fence surrounding it and guard posts at most of the gates.

[Bouchart]

I never had cops in school, though the schools I went to were in the middle of suburbia and the student population was 99% white.

[KingofstarrySkies]

We've got like, a security officer. I think they have a taser? They're pretty chill though.

[Orange Wizard]

What the hell? Yes, America, the way to make schools safer is more guns.

And here I was thinking the big metal fence around the local primary school was excessive.

[Insanegame27]

Well... Why? Australia does well enough without school cops. Wow...


We had cops AT school a couple of times... mostly recruitment drives and the like but once we had a false alarm.


He have had paramedics at school many, many times before as a result of the boys will be boys policy.

FAKEEDIT: Ninja'd four times. OW, I thought they were to keep the kids IN